I’ve found the best relationship fosters the greatest freedom. The best relationship therefore is the one I have with me. My Personal Trinity.
Relationships with other people can’t match it.
But when I prioritize my relationship with my Inner Being, all other relationships get better. Or they disappear from my life experience. Or they’re replaced by better versions of themselves.
It’s hard describing with accuracy how great my relationship with me feels. Like the feeling of love or bliss, it defies description.
I can say prioritizing my Inner Being relationship required owning parts of me I avoided. Like how powerful I am. Like knowing I created the life experience I’ve had, including the people in it. And knowing I can create any reality I want. No matter my current reality.
It also required accepting other parts of me. Authentic parts. Accepting them fully.
- That I prefer being free. Meaning, preferring something other than constraints marriage brings.
- That I find transgender women smart, beautiful and extraordinary.
- That the mainstream binary spectrum doesn’t define me.
Making my relationship with me my priority blew up my marriage. That’s right. I knew for a while it was coming. It was not ever intending to last. It was temporary as all things are. She filed for divorce a few weeks ago. I’m sure it’s final now. We’re both moving forward. And that’s great. It was a learning experience for both parties.
I know divorce happened because my relationship with me became more important than my marriage. Examined from a Positively Focused perspective my marriage played its part in my unmarriedness.
It offered so much authenticity I realized what I wanted. And marriage was not it.
I also realized how deep, fulfilling and rewarding my relationship with me is. So marriage served a glorious purpose.
As all life experience does.
My new, post-marriage life already has brought monumental evidence. Evidence supporting prioritizing my me/me relationship. It comes like a slow motion avalanche. In quantities sufficient to astound but not overwhelm.
- I manifested paying work as soon as I needed it
- I manifested an awesome living place. It’s beautifully furnished and owned by landlords aligned with Positive Focus.
- I live within biking distance of every grocer I like shopping at. I’m also walking distance to many places I enjoy visiting. Including parks, water spots, and tea shops.
- I have all I need to move forward with my projects including my 1:1 Spiritual Mentoring. There’s ample space to make videos, and blazing fast internet (included in the rent). Most of my mentoring I do online.
- And, several people, bringing differing levels of intimacy have replaced my marriage. That’s a far better fit to what and who I am than being tied to one person.
I know beliefs I hold create my life experience. The more Positively Focused I become the better my life goes.
When it comes to people relationships, Seth describes what happens when a person makes their me/me relationship a top priority:
People with like ideas reinforce each other’s beliefs. You may meet with some misunderstanding when you suddenly decide to change your reality by changing your beliefs—according to the circumstances, you may be going in a completely different direction than [your spouse]. The others may feel it necessary to defend ideas that both of you previously took for granted. In such cases your beliefs merged. Each individual has his or her own ideas about reality for reasons that seem valid. Needs are met. When you abruptly change your beliefs, then in the [marriage] you no longer have the same position—you are not playing that game any longer…you may suddenly cease to provide for [your spouse] a need that you satisfied earlier. This affects both intimate behavior and, say, social interactions. Others, sharing your new beliefs, will gravitate toward you and you to them.
The quote is playing out in my life.
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One belief we humans share is relationships with other people complete us somehow. Like without a relationship, we’re not whole.
It’s a strong belief.
What I’ve learned is, that yearning is real.
But as I try filling it with another person I’m asking for trouble. Because people aren’t here to satisfy that yearning. They have their own path. Their own experience. Their own reality.
That yearning is natural. It’s normal. And it’s meant to direct me to the relationship that brings everything I want. Including, ironically, fulfilling relationships with other people.
That relationship is the one I have with my Broader Perspective.
I prioritize that relationship because my Inner Being not only knows what I want. It knows the “where” the “when” and the “how” to get those things. That leaves me worry-free. It leaves me not needing any of those answers about anything I want.
When I follow my intuition, which is how my Inner Being communicates, I get those things. It handles the “where” the “when” and the “how”.
My job: finding ways to synchronize with my Inner Being focus. When I do that, what I want happens in delightful ways, yes. But also with little effort, struggle and sacrifice.
When I’m not synchronized with my Inner Being, life happens how it does for most people. With a lot of blame, judgement, demanding, frustration, annoyance, impatience, pain, hard work, struggle, sacrifice, anxiety and more. Absent all that, I find continual freedom, joy and happiness.
And, yes, everything else I want too. Including great relationships, and material things, including money.
I think it’s worth giving up yearning for human relationships.
Besides, what human-to-human relationship can match what my Inner Being brings? When I get that relationship right, right relationships come into my life.
That’s why I call my relationship with my Inner Being the best relationship.
Because it is.