Mind-Blowing Sex Comes Easily By Being Positively Focused 😄

Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash Positively Focused
Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

Sex is fun. Sex is more fun when you love yourself. Being Positively Focused creates self-love that knows no bounds. There, sex, even solo-sex, leaves knees weak, and libido highly satisfied.

My best sex ever happens when I’m by myself. Although I’m not by myself. My Broader Perspective is with me loving me as I love myself. When I have sex with myself, my entire Personal Trinity is there too. So it’s really an orgy 😂. An orgy of ecstasy.

The last time I had sex with myself, it left me weak for hours. The passion, the joy, the LOVE was so abundant…sex with others just can’t compare.

It seems weird that our society considers self-pleasure sinful or weird or even secondary to giving one’s self to another. Often times we give ourselves in casual situations, as if giving ourselves means little. I used to think sex wasn’t sex if it happened alone. That’s “masturbation”…a very unsexy word if you ask me. Where’s the romance in “masturbation”?

“Masturbation”: society says: “Don’t touch that!”. They’re wrong! Touch it! (Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash)

In my experience, joy of sex is off-the-charts when performed solo. That’s because through being Positively Focused, I’ve come to love my self.

My self-love knows no bounds. Why wouldn’t I be at the top of my list of people I want to have sex with? What’s more, knowing what I know, with weak-in-the-knees solo-sexual experiences part of my life now, why would I share myself with someone I hardly know, someone who likely is no where near as connected to themself as I am to me?

The tyranny of no connection

I get how desperation leads people to fucking almost anyone. So many people have no real connection with another. It’s rarer still that a person has a deep, real connection with themselves. Desperate to find connection, they look for it through the penis or vagina or other body parts of another, rather than finding the only source of unconditional, unbridled and ecstatic connection: with themselves.

It’s no surprise when sex amounts to “getting one’s rocks off”, or it gets stale after having sex with the same person over and over. Even someone you really (think you) love.

I’ve been there. I’ve done that.

And there I usually felt post-orgasm dissatisfaction. The more causal the experience, the more unsatisfying it was after the fact. It was fun during. But the aftermath…well, it was emotional aftermath.

Now I know better.

Casual sex with no connection gives momentary pleasure, but connection is better. Especially self-connection. (Photo by We-Vibe WOW Tech on Unsplash)

Fully accepting me and feeling good

Loving me means knowing me and accepting me. That means knowing and accepting what I like. I enjoy what I enjoy and the more I do it, and accept that I’m doing it and enjoying it, the more joy I get from it.

So many stories out there say what feels good is bad.

It’s the opposite people!

What’s good is good. What’s good leads you to more good. Follow that good-trail and before you know it, you’re in bliss…in bed, by yourself, yes, but also out in the world. Here’s the fringe bennie: when you’re chronically in bliss, you can’t help but meet blissful people. All those assholes? They can’t find you!

Why on earth do we have positive feelings for?

A client describes how being blissful causes old beliefs creating old realities to pale in comparison.

It’s deliciously mind-blowing

Accepting me happened over many years. Being Positively Focused helped a lot. I’m glad I’m here, loving myself in bed and while moving through my day. Nothing compares to that. No one else’s attention matters more to me than attention I pay to myself.

And in that selfishness, I discover doing things I want to do, having things I want to have and being happy…all come easily. Joyful ecstasy of the Charmed Life. It’s available to everyone. And it will make anyone weak in the knees.

How Great Life Gets When I Let Universe Life Me

Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash

It’s fun watching my life shape to my Positively Focused thoughts. It feels wonderful seeing my positive thoughts legitimize themselves by creating realities consistent with them.

I know all thoughts do that, of course. Any thought thought long enough will draw to the thinker evidence proving the thought “true”. When enough evidence gets created, the thought no longer is a thought. It becomes reality, then a belief. The belief fades into the background of my awareness. Life then becomes “how it is.”

That’s accurate to say for any thought that has become a belief. Which is why I don’t concern myself with people who disagree with me about what I share through Positively Focused.

Plenty of people out there think “you create your reality through your thoughts” is a bunch of hogwash. But they don’t understand the preceding paragraphs. They don’t know their thought “it’s hogwash” became a belief long ago and is out of their awareness now that it has become a belief, and attracts evidence of its “truth”.

That’s why I don’t spend time trying to convince someone “you create your reality through your thoughts”…unless they’re a client. 😊

Clients are different

A client is open. They’re willing to consider new possibilities. They want to believe. That makes seeing around existing beliefs more likely.

What I love about what I do with my clients is this: It’s easy for me to say “you create your reality through your thoughts” and point to my life, as full of evidence as it is. It’s also easy for people to dismiss such evidence.

But as more clients come to Positively Focused, create extraordinary lives as my current clients are, it gets harder and harder to deny that something different is happening.

Nearly all my clients are extraordinarily excited about their lives. They’re engaged and happy. They’re having fun discovering what I’ve discovered. And in their discovery I find joy too.

Client work then becomes play. It’s a win-win for both parties. My clients enjoy Charmed Lives. I enjoy watching that. And I grow a larger and larger, undeniable body of evidence that Universe loves us all and gives us all for that which we ask.

Evidence like this from a client session:

It’s The Most Perfect Manifestation Technique

I’ve added yet another running series “Q/A” to my Positively Focused blog. It’s…well…about answering questions I get through the internets and sharing those answers with others as they may help others feel inspired and more connected to the God they are.

Question: Is this correct for manifestation? I’d light colored candles assigned in each day while I meditate, script my manifestations, do a novena until the (small) candle melts. Novena is for my wish too and protection in case evil spirit is around my candle.

Answer: In short, you’re trying too hard. But if this way you describe conjures positive feelings in you, keep it up.

That said, there is a “correct way” for manifestation. It’s any way that feels good.

You see, you are a manifesting machine. Your body is a manifestation you’re manifesting on an ongoing basis. Do you have to “do a novena until the candle melts.” to keep your body here?

Your thoughts are manifestations flowing to you incessantly. Do you have to meditate and script manifestations for the thoughts that come to you?

When you moved your fingers to write your question, you were manifesting. Did you need to worry about evil spirits while creating that question?

You can’t help but manifest!

The reason why you do your body and your thoughts (as examples) so easily that you don’t know you are doing these things is because you pay them no mind and in doing so you don’t get in the way of your own, eternal, powerful ability.

When you walk through your created reality and put your attention on something, that, alone gets the manifestation process going. Looking at something, you know whether you like what you’re looking at or you not, right?

The moment you know, whether you’re aware of knowing or not aware of it, you create innumerable probable future and alternate realities, existing “out there” in your future nows.

Which one becomes your present now (in the future) depends on what you do between the time you choose and the time what you choose shows up. Most people don’t understand this, so they think they have to do processes and meditations and lighting candles and performing magic.

Do them if they feel good

You can do those things, and if they feel good keep doing them.

By the way, “evil” is not a thing. Neither are “evil spirits”. But if you believe they are, then they are. Why? Because you create your reality….ALL OF IT.

Here’s a simple, accurate template for creation:

  1. You decide what you want by realizing what you don’t want. This happens automatically
  2. Immediately after step one, what you want becomes a reality.
  3. You must find a way to line up with what you’ve created. When you do…
  4. You’ll have it.

That’s it. 

The problem is, most people spend all their time in step one, trying to make it happen. While doing that they are creating reality….it just keeps looking like their present reality, with nothing really changing, because they don’t move on to the rest of the steps!

But you don’t need me or anyone else telling you all this. Life can be fun, rewarding and fulfilling. You can have a life where it fills in with everything you want. Be easy and don’t take “manifesting” so seriously. It’s supposed to be fun.

Positively Focused probable realities
Click here to learn about probable realities, how you form them and how they relate to belief constellations.

Why Spiritual Journeys Are Hard For Some People

Positively Focused is the way to go. Anguish can be good.
Photo by Armin Lotfi on Unsplash

All clients starting a Positively Focused path experience life falling apart. That’s because recalibrations happen almost at once.

Those recalibrations happen any time one begins a spiritual path true to universal premises. So “life falling apart” is a good thing, an indicator the path works, a indicator the path contains accurate wisdom.

Still, such recalibrations can be so frightful for some, without a mentor, they will abandon the path. Some even give up even while having someone guiding them.

One such client came to me in great pain. Her living situation sucks. She lives in a strong, patriarchal, Middle Eastern country. Her father sexually abuses this client, who is in her 20s. Neither her mother nor her siblings intervene.

At her wits end, she found Positively Focused, reached out and asked for guidance, which I gladly gave. She began the work with me three weeks ago.

After her second session, she bailed.

Her belief constellations pushed back so hard, she couldn’t handle tension existing between her strong existing beliefs about immediate reality, and her equally strong existing desire for more and better, aka a Charmed Life.

An early-stage client’s belief constellations trigger, just before she gives up.

Good news is, “giving up” always is temporary. One way or another, suffering ends. For everyone, death ends suffering. At death we give up resistance to what is and return to pure positive awareness, bliss and unconditional love, which is what we all are.

But for that rare number, suffering ends the moment they take charge of how they create reality. In other words, we need not wait until death to experience overflowing love.

But first one must learn

Tension between existing belief and existing desire is common. Such tension indicates realities one is creating are going to stay the same for a while, rather than become more and better. So it’s important knowing when one has both existing belief and existing desire simultaneously. This is the main reason why physical reality changes so slowly.

Eliminating this tension creates faster realize-ation.

Knowing this becomes obvious once one knows how to see the signs, practices, then witnesses obvious results.

Until then, spiritual seekers will shoot themselves in the feet by attracting thoughts that distract their attention, then express thoughts accurately reflecting their beliefs AND their desire…while not realizing that’s what is going on.

For example, a different client bemoaned his progress because he didn’t experience it as progress. His existing beliefs, the way he sees the world, and his existing desire, wanting more and better according to his circumstances, were in tension. The tension he felt, felt like pain.

What he said (via text) accurately expressed this pain:

A client clues into his obvious progress forward, after not seeing it at all.

But notice how he described his state of “slipping”. He expressed it so accurately and yet, totally missed the clue.

When I showed him the obvious sign, it broke through his resistance. He instantly felt better. Instant emotional improvement indicates massive progress.

Progress is always right in front of your face

Notice his statement’s accuracy. Notice he didn’t say “1 step forward, 2 steps back.” That would have told a different story, one where he was slipping.

But he wasn’t slipping. He was moving forward. He just didn’t see the obvious sign, until I pointed it out.

That’s funny because that happens a lot with people on spiritual paths. They can’t see evidence, even when it’s right in front of them.

It’s hard…until it’s not

A new client gets it.

Many clients tell me being Positively Focused is hard. It can be, but it doesn’t have to be. Having someone who knows the path helps a lot.

Walking the path without someone showing the way is possible. Some don’t need assistance. But most usually do, which is why I offer what I offer.

It’s painful at first recalibrating to one’s Inner Being, one’s Broader Perspective, rather than being aligned to old stories creating current reality. That pain is optional for those who assiduously use built-in indicators existing for exactly that purpose: making the path not only easy, but fun.

It gets easy for everyone though after momentum builds.

In spiritual practices, early on it can feel like things are going backwards. But even when it feels that way, it’s progress. Knowing that will bring needed relief when feeling frustrated.

I know this from personal experience. So do my clients. Well…most of them 😃.

The Sweet Spot Feels Sweet And Creates Better Nows

positively focused

It’s so fun being Positively Focused. I’m playing more, working less, enjoying more complaining less and the more I do this the better my life gets!

Just woke from a wonderful nap. It was a choice between that, going out for a walk in the cold, cloudless, sunny day, or making cookies. All good, fun things. Or I could have done worked on my projects.

I sat and felt how each felt, listening and feeling each idea for the best combination of alignment and pleasure.

The nap felt best. My dreams and how delightful I feel post-nap show me I made a great choice. My Broader Perspective loves it.

And so do I.

And I woke with plenty of time for my next client. With no alarm clock, or reminder chime waking me or anything!

And…LOL…I created this blog post effortlessly! So napping rendezvoused me with a perfect thing to write about, thus enabling me to work effortlessly! LOL. So fun!

The Positive Value Of Negative Feelings

Photo by AH NP on Unsplash

The power of being Positively Focused shows up most when feeling negative emotions. The following true story shows what to do when one feels such emotions.

I woke Sunday morning to powerful, clear dreams, but also felt negative emotion. It doesn’t matter what the emotions were about. What matters is what I did.

Here’s what I wrote in my journal in response to this realization. Doing something like this anytime negative emotion shows up makes a ton of difference:

Right this moment I am at the same time present to my powerful expanding self and my currently active beliefs.

I know the more I lean toward the first, not only do I create more of that, but the second soothes into its rightful place: subordinate to my dominant powerful desire. I appreciate therefore the combination, because in the combination I get to choose.

  • I get to choose leaning toward my desires
  • I get to choose focus, deliberate focus
  • I get to create a reality consistent with what I want
  • I know focusing feels really good as it does now
  • I know focusing on my desires is the gift the negative emotion brings
  • Therefore I appreciate the negative emotion
  • I know negative emotion was once positive belief
  • I can appreciate the negative emotion
  • I know the negative emotion is indicating beliefs I still hold are active
  • This is purposeful and good
  • I know those beliefs once served me
  • I can appreciate the negative emotion
  • I can appreciate the beliefs too

And as I sit here in my bed, first thing in the morning, I feel the power of my focus. I feel the shifting of the balance of my belief and desire.

  • I like what I’ve just done
  • It feels subtle but sure
  • I feel the shift from slight dominant negative focus to slight dominant positive focus
  • I appreciate that my positively focused practice allows me to recognize the subtle distinction
  • For now I can shift my entire reality experience toward more and better
  • This feels really good
  • This feels like positive emotion
  • “I’m feeling happier”
  • But that statement still contains a little bit of negative emotion
  • My happiness is relative to my previous negative feelings
  • “I feel happy”, feels better
  • It is focused specifically in the now, with no relation to the past
  • This is the work and I love it
  • My happiness now has turned to appreciation
  • Now my appreciation has turned into eagerness and passion
  • I love feeling eagerness and passion
  • Now my eagerness and passion has turned to love
  • I love feeling love.

So in this process I just went through, I received inspiration from previous awarenesses, which allowed me to know that the combination of negative belief and positive expectation will always be. For the combination allows an eternal being ensconced in the body, which is what I am, to choose.

To choose what? To choose what’s next.

So much happened in the last four minutes doing this practice. I love how much better I feel now just by speaking these words

  • I love how good I’m feeling
  • It feels really really good
  • It feels like joy
  • It feels like self transformation
  • If feels like fun
  • It feels like self love

I know the more I do this, the better my life gets. I also know the better my life gets, the better it can get, for there is no upper limit on how good things can be.

I feel so much better. I feel positively focused. I’ve literally changed my reality. I feel in love with life and in love with myself.

Positively Focused Makes Reality Better And More Fun

The power of being Positively Focused is undeniable. That’s why all my clients are in various stages of seeing evidence of their lives getting better and better, and more fun.

Here, a client fulfills a long-held desire: a wonderful experience with her daughter, the wonder of which even her daughter acknowledged. That acknowledgment surprised and delighted my client.

A mother re-creates her relationship with her daughter through being Positively Focused.

Not only that, but her grandchildren too got in on the act. They said “We wish you could stay with us all the time.”

How dear. 🥲

After months of struggle with her daughter, the client realizes the struggle is unnecessary. When she does, the struggle disappears. Where did the struggle come from? Where did it go?

It wasn’t always this way

Beliefs create reality. It’s undeniable. Not knowing this, people look out into physical reality, seeing their created reality as something objective, separate from them. They then draw conclusions about what they see.

These conclusions we call “thoughts”. Thought enough times, those thoughts become beliefs. In time, beliefs create realities consistent with them, then fade into the background. Beliefs are forgotten, yet they still exist in physical form, before our eyes as our personal, subjective reality. It’s the only reality a person has access to.

Everyone adopts beliefs from childhood onward. They do this while not knowing such beliefs create realities consistent with them. Before they realize it, a trajectory gets created where beliefs create realities continuously.

My client had entire belief constellations about her daughter formed in exactly this way. The constellation included beliefs adopted from her childhood, her experiences with her grandparents and parents, beliefs that created a version of her daughter consistent with them.

In only nine sessions this client transformed her relationship with her daughter. The struggle? Replaced with joy. You can see her happiness in her face, hear it in her tone and in her words. She ends the video with a statement that gets to the meat of the matter.

You create your reality. Learning how, then deliberately using that process makes everything possible. Including new relationships transformed from the toughest family situations.

Life can be fun and continuously better and better. Happiness, being Positively Focused, is the way.

Addendum: When I showed the clip and asked permission to use it from the client, she said: “Almost made me cry. You have my permission to use this. I hope someone might gain insight from my experience.”

Indeed, I know it will.

Mastering Life Mastery Creates Better Living Experiences

Positively Focused Journal entry branding

This is a positively focused series called “journal entries” for when I experience something I write about in my journal I think others might benefit from reading. This is a continuation of that series.

From my journal – Monday, January 25, 2021

Waking this morning to the cacophony that is my being. The more I focus into all that I am, I discover so much more of what I am. I know this will never end. Sometimes I feel limited in my ability to accept my reality.

It’s just so much happening, all now, at the same time.

But then things happen, things like this morning, things like what happened in my dreams last night, things that just work out, and things that I have experience that allow my consciousness to stretch forward toward exactly what I think is limited. And in that stretch forward the limits fall; I find myself in a new perspective with an even broader view than before.

I’m finding comfort in the combination of that which will always be: simultaneous awareness of positive awareness, indicating satisfaction and joy in the now, and a reaching for more of what humans called “negative emotion”.

When examined, that phenomenon “negative emotion”, feels more like stress, or tension, a combination of two realities that when combined propel me into the more. So that feeling is a good thing, not a “negative” one at all.

I can tell the more I see this combination this way, the easier it is to break through or move through limits thereby allowing broader perspective and the increased momentum of feeling desires.

This is the process of deliberate creation and life mastery. I’m wanting to master life mastery. I know I am on the way to doing so, because all desires are done deals. My job is lining up with the fulfilled desire by enjoying the process of allowing the fulfilled desire into my awareness.

That’s real-ization.

It’s subtle, yet a distinct and important differentiator.

How I Create My Ideal Other People

Being Positively Focused is a lot like being a Jedi in real life. I create my ideal versions of other people who then give me what I want when they realize what I want is what they want.

Nutshelling it: When I work through my Broader Perspective, my Inner Being talks to their Inner Being so that what I want occurs to them as what they want too.

A true story showing how this works.

I live in a house I share with three others. When I first moved in, the other three people were quiet and kept to themselves. The landlord showed me my space, “the basement suite” they called it.

Of course, it was perfect. It represented a fulfilled desire coming in perfect timing, as I wanted a new, quiet living space after my ex and I split.

Over several months these original three housemates moved out. Three new people replaced them. People I didn’t enjoy as housemates.

The first was a party boy. He enjoyed drinking, playing loud music and having people over for loud conversations.

The next person was an “adult child”. He had family of origin issues that showed up as screaming at the top of his lungs for no reason, using other people’s property without asking, getting offended at the slightest provocation and not cleaning up after himself. Oh, he also peed in the backyard!

The third person was even worse. He was an Adult Child of Alcoholics, muttered to himself and didn’t respect the landlord’s established norms for living there.

His replacement oddly enough, expected others to clean up behind him. He left things all over the house, let his food get moldy in the fridge, and would leave dishes and utensils on the front porch instead of taking them to the kitchen and washing them.

What’s interesting was each of these people reflected a dimension of my ex. While living with her I developed strong co-creative momentum with her. So strong a momentum, housemates who moved in after I did reflected that momentum. In other words, my Moment of Becoming and momentum brought housemates after me matching experiences I had with my ex.

My ex is from a family of alcoholics. Slight provocations triggered her too. She enjoyed playing her music loud while ignoring other people’s interests. Occasionally she cleaned up behind herself, but often would leave things right where she had them last. I tried a lot of things to change her (not a good idea at all I realize now). All my attempts made things worse.

I’m happier no longer there.

Obviously though my Belief Constellation still included thoughts about her. I know this because each house mate brought experiences and behaviors matching my ex, or rather matching beliefs I still had active about my ex. Were my experiences with my ex less active in my Belief Constellation, different people would show up. These new housemates were not random coincidence.

I know everything in my reality reflects back to me Belief Constellation content. That’s helpful knowing because I can do something with that knowledge. Not knowing what I know, life seems random and separate. It never is though. My thoughts and my reality always match.

So every housemate served me: Each showed me I still had beliefs worth changing. In changing them, I could get a better reality.

Before that though…

At first, I let myself get annoyed about my new housemates’ behaviors. I know emotional reactions are never about what’s happening in my physical reality, they’re always only about my connection with my Inner Being and that is all.

Saying “each new housemate was annoying” or “my new housemates made me annoyed” are complete, inaccurate distortions.

I also know what to do when I feel annoyance. I didn’t do that at first though.

At first I tried coaxing different behaviors out of them. I tried asking the slob to clean up after himself, which, of course, he refused. I asked the ACA dude to stick to the house norms. He told me to fuck off. I asked the party guy to be more quiet. He complained about me to the other housemates, which exacerbated my relationships with them. I asked the backyard pee-er to stop doing a lot of stuff. He got better, but still did things I didn’t like. The other housemates didn’t like it either.

Since direct action didn’t work, and my frustration was getting unbearable, I did the only thing under my control. I changed what I paid attention to, I let go, I surrendered.

It was a radical choice, an interesting sociological experiment. The only recent experience I had creating new people from existing people was with my ex. But that was indeliberate creation. Now, life presented me a huge learning opportunity: Learn to create people you want in life experience deliberately, it said.

So that’s what I did.

Surrender isn’t giving up. It’s realizing where power exists. Real effortless power comes through allowing Universe to bring me what I want instead of trying to make it happen myself.

People always reflect back to me what I believe. I’m creating them for my benefit. I know whatever thoughts I’m thinking that I’m ignoring for some reason will come clear through how people both show up and how they treat me. My expansion never ends, so learning opportunities never end either.

Life is best when I follow the inner knowing of my Broader Perspective. When doing that I realize people always reflect back to me my beliefs. (See the full illustrated post here).

So people in my life experience all are helpers, giving me feedback, as does everything else in my physical reality. This feedback tells me “Universe will bring me what I want when I let it.”

I let it through being Positively Focused.

I am feedback for others as well. With many years Positively Focused practice, I feel the pull of other people’s focus. Feeling that pull, sometimes it’s hard maintaining my own focus. I end up being someone less than I want to be. But I know when that happens, I’m matching that other person’s reality, and doing so, give them what they’re wanting to know, even if they don’t know that.

These days it’s easier being authentic, loving me while feeling others’ pulls. My Positively Focused practice has perpetual momentum now. Most of the time these days, I set the tone of an interaction. People shape to my pull instead of me shaping to theirs.

Not so when I was with my ex. Back then, when out in the world, I found it easy staying positive and excited about life. But then I’d come home and almost instantly feel my mood shift when I re-entered the persistent negative atmosphere she and I co-created.

I benefitted a ton from that marriage. She did too. For me, marriage helped me prioritize my Inner Being relationship. As a result, I’m living even more of a Charmed Life than I lived before.

I love how all relationships have that potential: they can amplify one’s focus on the one place unconditional love comes from: the relationship between one’s self and one’s Inner Being.

Things got interesting

So instead of trying to cajole my housemates into compliance, instead of trying to get them to stop doing what I didn’t like. I did what I show my clients: I focused instead on what I wanted. Then I let my Personal Trinity coordinate a new reality. One which included versions of my housemates that matched what I wanted.

What I wanted was a calm, quiet, peaceful place where people subordinated their behavior to the goals of a mutually beneficial, peaceful living space.

I knew, and know even more today, that through my Inner Being relationship, I can be, do and have anything I want. I knew I already created probable versions of my housemates, versions matching what I want. I knew my Inner Being held for me a living situation filled with such housemates.

My job: tune myself to that probable reality alive in my Belief Constellation, so it would emerge through my Moment of Becoming in to my physical reality.

Here’s what I did.

  • First I clarified in my mind what I wanted. I knew it was there in my belief constellation. I just had more momentum behind what I didn’t want (experiences similar to living with my ex) as a result of still thinking about my ex.
  • I thought thoughts about what it would look like living in my ideal living situation.
  • I thought about how my ideal housemates moved through the house and…
  • I thought about and focused on how peaceful, harmonious and quiet it was in my minds-eye version of my living situation.

By envisioning these, I knew I cued up that probable reality matching my ideal, my Charmed Life. But I needed something more. Something critical.

Early in Positively Focused practice, the practitioner strengthens their perceptive skills through feeling emotion. People feel emotions easier than vibration. Emotions let me know what vibration I’m tuned to. Vibration is early-stage manifestation. I needed to tune my vibration via my thoughts to my desired reality.

So while thinking about my ideal living situation, I focused more and more on how that situation felt. Then I amped up those feelings by focusing on them and riffing on emotions in the same vicinity:

  • It feels nice living in this ideal situation
  • It feels peaceful living here
  • It feels like harmony
  • It feels like peace
  • It feels satisfying
  • It feels like home
  • It feels joyful
  • It feels right
  • It feels good…

Next, I completely ignored what my current housemates did. When Slob left his dishes in the living room, or on the porch outside, I ignored it. When Family-of-origin peed in the backyard, or screamed “FUCK!” in the middle of the day, I ignored that too.

Then I took it up a notch. I ignored my housemates. Whenever they were in the common areas – the living room, the kitchen – I stayed in my room. If I was in the kitchen and one came in, I made sure I had my headphones in and listened to a podcast or music.

Then I amped it up further. This is a bit hard to explain. I lived in the house as though my ideal housemates already lived with me. I felt how good that felt. I reveled in their presence. I focused on how great the place would feel with them with me.

How I create other people in five easy steps.

Then awesome happened

The fist thing that happened was ACA moved out. Unbeknowst to me, he contacted the landlord saying he needed to move out ASAP. He said his counselor said living alone would be a better living situation for him.

Next, Slob and Family of Origin started getting on each others’ nerves. Family of Origin started enjoying the house being clean and tidy. He also improved around cleaning up after himself.

Problem (for him) was, Slob’s living habits started getting on his nerves. So Family of Origin pointed out more often things Slob was doing. Exasperated, Slob started looking for someplace else to live. In a month, he was gone!

Perhaps you’ve seen my pictures on my website, so you know I’m brown-skinned. All my housemates up to this point were of the dominant culture. So you can imagine my surprise when my landlord introduced me to ACA’s replacement, another person of color. Let’s call him Andre.

Not surprisingly, Andre told me and the landlord he was looking for a cleaner, quieter and more peaceful living situation, which was NOT where he lived before. He said he liked keeping to himself and was super-respectful. Having toured the house, he already recommended ideas on improving the living situation.

After he moved in, the whole character of the living situation changed. Andre shared a bathroom with Family of Origin and right away Andre put his foot down about how Family of Origin left hair all over the bathroom and hardly cleaned up after himself (I have my own bathroom).

Next the landlord introduced me, Family of Origin and Andre to Slob’s replacement, another person of color and a college student I’ll call Lorenzo. Like Andre, he expressed living in a respectful, quiet place because he’s studying full time from home. Lorenzo and Andre’s energy both transformed the house’s culture. Family of Origin mentioned feeling uncomfortable living with three people of color, this being the first time that ever happened.

Not long after Lorenzo moved in, I heard him and Family of Origin having a slightly tense conversation about race. I went upstairs to see what was up. They were discussing whether a person of color could be racist. It was an interesting conversation I joined with eagerness. It went well, but I could tell Family of Origin was struggling with his “white fragility”.

Within two months, Family of Origin moved out too. His replacement: a kind, peaceful, hard working woman I’ll call Cindy. Cindy and I hit it off right away. Today, we share meals, watch movies together and talk eagerly about our passions. She’s a great fit. So is Lorenzo and Andre too!

Lorenzo and Andre moved out, but two new housemates I’ll call Jeff and Tomiko moved in behind them. They both are wonderful, peaceful, respectful and quiet people. And one of them is transgender which hits close to home.

Epilogue:

What happened here?

Several things unfolded in perfect universal coordination. One, I realized how my current, unwanted reality clarified beliefs in my Belief Constellation I wanted cleaned up.

Next, I surrendered to the unwanted by accepting rather than pushing against those things.

Then I ignored all those things, including the people creating them. Instead of giving what I wanted changed attention, I put attention on future realities containing what I wanted.

Doing all this, I tuned myself so that my now gradually matched my desires. On the way to that, my Inner Being coordinated with Inner Being’s of my old housemates. Through that coordination their Inner Being’s gave them impulses they felt were right for them. They came to their conclusions that served them. Conclusions that served me too.

My Inner Being simultaneously coordinated with people who matched what I wanted, people whose desires matched what I wanted too, and inspired them to me. The result: new people in my living situation matched with my desire and thus, an ideal living space.

Creating people consistent with one’s desires is fairly advanced, but possible for everyone. Cultivating Positively Focused momentum makes available nonphysical connections we share with others. Those connections exist for our use. When Positively Focused, that use ultimately matches me with people consistent with and in agreement with what I want.

It feels like mind control, but it’s not. I feel like a Jedi, but that’s at best, a fable. What’s really happening is I’m drawing to me people wanting what I want, for their own personal reasons that match my own. I call that co-creation between people. It’s so fun!

Being Positively Focused Is Rare

(Photo: Leah Millis/Reuters)

“If you depend on the behavior of another to be a certain way in order for you to feel good, you are on very shaky ground with regard to feeling good. For you cannot control how others be. But you can control what you think. And in controlling what you think, by focusing on thoughts that feel good, you discover people’s behaviors occur in such ways that feel good to you. And so you control other people‘s behavior, not by trying to control them, but by controlling your thoughts about them.”