Why The Easiest Way To Happiness Is First Being Happy

Arnolds wrong blog
Arnold thinks you need to work your ass off. He’s wrong. (Art credit: The author)

Modern life says, if you want something you should set a vision. Next, set goals and objectives, put them on a timeline and track your progress. If you work your ass off, struggle and get lucky, you succeed.

None of that is necessary.

Many mainstream leaders, motivational speakers and successful people encourage these steps. But you can have anything you want easier than that.

And, you don’t have lose any of your ass. 😜

The easiest way to getting anything you want is by being happy.

That sounds crazy, we know.

Most mainstream leaders, motivational speakers and successful people didn’t become successful by being happy.

They can only tell you how they did it. Theirs is the hard way.

Yet, nearly everyone tries finding success that way. Rather than trying a different, better way. Their way works. But it’s no fun. And success isn’t guaranteed.

Happiness brings success 100 percent of the time. You don’t need luck. You needn’t work hard.

You only need to know three things:

  1. Why feeling happy works
  2. How to use happiness and,
  3. What the purpose of happiness is.

“There’s a purpose to happiness?”

You bet.

Ask someone next to you what is the purpose of happiness. Likely they won’t have a good answer. They will say happiness is an emotion. They may say it doesn’t have a purpose. Or that happiness makes you feel good. Some will say they don’t know.

Some even steer you away from happiness.

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Almost 135,000 claps. A lot of people don’t know what purpose happiness serves. (Photo: Medium.com)

Yet your emotional capacity is purposeful. Powerful too. Your emotional capacity is the most powerful tool you have.

Once you understand its purpose, if you make being happy your number one priority, everything you want comes quickly, easily, and in great numbers.

Some people poo-poo happiness because they don’t understand its power. We’ll explain how and why happiness is so powerful later. We’ll even show you how to use happiness to get anything you want.

But first, check out how Perry realized several dreams at once, just by being happy.

 

How Perry Gets What He Wants Without Goal Setting, Working Hard Or Losing His Ass

Perry fell in love with sailing three summers ago. It started with a class he took on an impulse. He loved his first time on a sail boat. The sails grabbed the wind. The wind pushed the boat over on its side as it increased speed. Invigorating!

That first experience begat a new dream. How cool would it be, he thought, exploring the world this way?

Perry had no sailing experience. Only one class. That didn’t matter though. He knew others sailing around the world today. Families, couples, even single people are doing it. Some didn’t have experience when they started either. Many taught themselves.

How hard could it be?

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It’s sailing. How hard can it be? (Photo: By Bcebul – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0)

Besides, Perry thought, he has his Inner Being. It has access to all knowledge. It knows where everything Perry wants is. And it knows how to lead him to it.

Another question people can’t answer is what’s Earth’s purpose? Does it have a purpose? Or is it a random result of chance?

Earth exists on purpose. It’s here so you can come, refine your interests from Earth’s massive variety. Then live those interests to the fullest extent imaginable.  Aided by your Broader Perspective, the universe and All That Is, your time on Earth can include any experience.

Perry knows this. So when his first sailing class finished that summer, sailing around the world became something he wanted. But he set no goals or timelines. Instead, he knew being happy would bring him what he wanted.

· · ·

Perry joined the sailing club that hosted his class. That gave him a year to practice sailing using the club’s boats. But he couldn’t sail them alone. He didn’t have enough experience.

He needed a sailing partner. It so happened he met a guy in class who also fell in love with sailing. His name was Jarrett.

Jarrett Blog
Jarrett aboard a training sailboat. (Photo by the author)

When you’re happy, not only do you not have to set intentions and goals, but all resources you need literally come to you. Including people.

These people’s Broader Perspectives put them on your path because your path lines up with theirs. Your Broader Perspective and their Broader Perspective coordinate events, matching people and resources. Such nonphysical communication happens all the time. That’s how events become events.

Including events comprising your life. So long as you don’t muck up the process, your life experience is a wonderful joyride. Being happy is how you keep from mucking up the process.

· · ·

Jarrett and Perry became friends. But Jarrett didn’t have money for a club membership.

No problem, Perry thought. Jarrett could be my guest. Here’s a video Perry took with Jarrett on a club boat cruising on the beautiful Columbia River.

For the next year, Perry and Jarrett’s friendship deepened. Turns out, Jarrett shares Perry’s life convictions. He too believes people create their reality and that life is meant to be fun. Jarrett works as a contract sound engineer. Like Perry, his time is his. He doesn’t have to be at a job every day. So he has a lot of free time.

Note the combination of people and events here: Jarrett’s time flexibility afforded by his occupation; Jarrett and Perry’s mutual beliefs; Both men taking the same class, at the same time. These illustrate how thoroughly your Broader Perspective organizes events on your behalf leaving out no detail.

How hard do you think it would have been for Perry organize this on his own? Finding someone who likes to sail, who has the time to spend sailing, who can pay for the class and believes the same thing he does? That would be no small feat.

But it’s a cinch for your Broader Perspective.

This is why people who don’t understand happiness believe they must struggle, work hard and set goals. That’s what you must do when you don’t know about your Broader Perspective. You’re on your own. On your own, you don’t have the resources nor the connections. That’s why you need luck and hard work.

 

Comparison Contains The Seeds Of Unhappiness.

One day, three months later, Jarrett arrived with news. Out of the blue, his uncle, a successful orthopedic surgeon, gave him a sailboat. A San Juan 7.7. Jarrett’s uncle bought the boat more than 20 years ago. He never sailed it. It sat in a barn all that time.

Jarrett was excited. He didn’t know his uncle had a boat. Let alone a sail boat. Knowing what he knows, Jarrett knew this was his Broader Perspective at work.  With no effort, Jarrett, who had never sailed in his life, now owned his own sail boat!

Now, Perry could have been excited too. But he wasn’t.

Outwardly he was happy for Jarrett. But inside, he was jealous.

Jarrett went on and on about his boat. About how it was equipped. Modifications his uncle added.  Modifications he wanted to do.  He was so excited.

Perry wasn’t excited.

He was thinking about how it must be to be white. How it must be to have a successful family. He wanted to be happy for his friend. But the more Jarrett talked about this damn boat, the less fun Perry was having. Even though it was a perfect day for sailing.

Perry was mucking up the process! How? By comparing his life to Jarrett’s!

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Comparing your life with another’s is never a good idea (Photo: Feliperizo-co-heart-made on Unsplash)

When you compare your life to someone you perceive has it better than you, unhappiness happens. Good news is, turning comparison’s unhappiness into happiness is easy. If you catch it early, that is.

So comparison can be beneficial. Feelings comparison conjures can serve as alerts. Like alerts, they can jolt you from habitual, indeliberate thinking.

Perry felt awful thinking about Jarrett’s “white privilege”. White privilege, while real, is not something you want to think about if you’re not white. Thinking about someone’s white privilege when you’re not white guarantees unhappiness.

Even if you are white, thinking about your white privilege can cause unhappiness. That’s why most white people don’t think about it!

Perry knew this of course. What he didn’t know was everything was working out perfectly for him, and for Jarrett. There were plenty pleasant surprises ahead.

But first, things were going to get “worse”.

Jarrett on Achilles I blog
Jarrett onboard Achilles I at dry dock. (Photo by the author)

The world around you is your subjective life experience. Your life experience comprises a stream of one accretion event after another.

These events look like random compositions of people, circumstances, objects and experiences strung together in a certain timing. Your string of accretion events over time is your life.

Events, circumstances, people and objects in your life aren’t random. These planned events seem random. But they’re not. Who is planning them? And how are they planned?

You plan them. You do so using two simultaneous processes. One is what you look at.  The other is what you think about what you look at.

Look at happy things or think happy thoughts. You’ll feel happy. What you’re looking at and thinking about organizes future accretion events matching current ones. Your life will fill with more and more happy events, people and circumstances.

Look at unhappy things or think unhappy thoughts. You won’t feel happy. What you’re looking at and thinking about organizes future accretion events matching current ones. Your life will fill with more and more events, people and circumstances like what you observe.

So, you decide what events, people, situations and circumstances become your experience. You know which ones are coming by how you feel and what you predominately look at and think about.

That’s how you create your life. No one else is doing it. You’re here to create a joyful life, filled with experiences you want to have. But nearly everyone doesn’t live that way, do they?

Why? Because they don’t know what you now know.

Instead, they live life not knowing their feelings are important. They think feelings just come and go. They think they’re responses to what happens in the world. That’s not what they are. That’s not what they’re doing. They are part of processes that create what’s in the world.

· · ·

Emotions are navigational instruments. They help create your life. Like any instrument, they give you information. The information tells you what you’re creating.

Kent Pilcher on Unsplash blog
Your emotions are navigational instruments. Like this aircraft instrument panel, emotions tell you where you are in relation to your desires: Towards them or away from them. (Photo: Kent Pilcher on Unsplash)

Sometimes your accretion event path includes what feels like negative events. Like feeling jealous because a white guy got a free boat, and you got nothin’. That may feel unpleasant. It may infuriate you. It may cause you to fight for justice.

But “unpleasant” is not encouraging you to fight for anything. It’s offering important navigational information.

Altimeter
Happiness works just like this altimeter. (Photo: FAA public domain)

Say you are flying an airplane one thousand feet in the air. The altimeter (pictured right), which tells you how high above the ground you are, indicates you are descending at a rate of 400 feet a minute.

That means in two minutes thirty seconds, you will crash into the ground.

That’s something you’d want to know, right? Knowing that, you’d probably do something about that. Right? Would you fight for lowering the ground or raising the sky? Of course not.

In the same way “unpleasant” is your instrument giving you actionable information. Perry knows this. He’s been practicing reading his “instrument panel”, the emotions he feels moment by moment. He understands what they mean.

Today, two and a half years after this story, he’s almost mastered acting instantly to his instruments. Experiences in this story helped Perry get where he is now.

The point is, experiences labeled “bad”, “negative”, “unfortunate”, “bad luck”, etc. are never that. They are always good. They are part of the adventure, practice opportunities.

These experiences teach how to read your instruments so you can “fly” through a life full of your best dreams, realized.

Ayko Neil Kehl on Unsplash blog
You can fly through your life with ease. No hard work or struggle. (Photo: Ayko Neil Kehl on Unsplash)

Back to Perry.

So Perry realized he was at a “you create your reality” cross roads.

On one hand, he felt opportunity. He knew he was the on the path of eventually sailing around the world. If he stayed positive, he’d have many adventures of a lifetime.

On the other hand, and at the exact same time, he felt jealous and bitter comparing his life with Jarrett’s.

But here’s the thing: this path would also culminate in many adventures of a lifetime.

Note that. Both paths leading to the same outcome. Both paths an adventure.

The only difference is the second path takes longer than the first.

Perry’s negative feelings were not because of Jarrett’s supposed White Privilege.  At that moment, and many that followed, Perry “faced” both potential paths simultaneously. In that moment, the second path was more probable by the first. How could he tell? By how he felt.

In other words, Perry’s beliefs about disadvantage, “Institutional Racism”, and “White Privilege”, vied with beliefs that Perry can have anything he wants any time he is ready. He could choose any belief. At that moment, he wasn’t choosing the second.

Why? It’s simple. The first ones were more practiced, that’s all.

The more you think a thought or believe a belief, the more influence it has on future life events. The good news is, at any time a thinker or believer can change how they think or believe.

Perry’s anguish was saying: there’s a shorter path! A more fun path! It’s the happy path!

Believing you can have anything you want whenever you’re ready is empowering. Believing your life experiences are limited because of your skin color is not. Both create life experiences consistent with themselves!

Looking back Perry gets it. As we’re writing this through his fingers, he sees how beneficial that moment and the following ones were.

But like many people, most people actually, Perry didn’t make a bold, clear choice. Instead, he waffled between anguish and a measly happiness. Perry stayed in this conflicted space a long time. For months. What happened next illustrates everything you’ve read so far.

 

Jesus Is Right: You Reap What You Sow. But You’re Never Stuck With It.

Perry’s club membership expired. Jarrett and Perry couldn’t use the club’s boats anymore. But they weren’t worried. Jarrett told Perry once he got “Achilles I” prepped and had it in the water, they’d resume their adventure.

Imagine the mixed bag Perry felt about that!

On one hand, it was wonderful. Had Perry went with that, the next year would have been different. Instead he went with the other hand. 😜

On the other hand, Perry would get to sail, sure. But every time he set foot on “Achilles I”, he’d be reminded about….well…you know.

Then something interesting happened.

Jarrett disappeared.

He wasn’t abducted. He wasn’t murdered. Perry didn’t now what happened. For the next eight months, Perry tried to reach Jarrett. Summer came and went. So did prime sailing weather. He left Jarrett text messages, emails.

Nothing. Of course, Perry thought the worst.

He made Jarrett’s lack of communication about him and Jarrett. He thought Jarrett had used him and his membership to sharpen his sailing skills. Now that he had his own boat, he didn’t need Perry any more. 🙄 🤷🏽‍♂️

He imagined Jarrett sailing with his friends. His white friends. He imagined that boat being amazing and he being left out. And, as you can imagine, this thinking left him in emotional turmoil.

giphy
From Giphy

Here’s what was really going on: Perry’s negative thinking orchestrated accretion events matching the negative thinking. But only for Perry. Jarrett absent for who knows why. Perry in the dumps. No membership meant no boats. No Jarrett also meant no boat. No boat meant no sailing.

After many months, Perry finally did something about his thoughts and beliefs.  Using this process he relieved himself of negative thoughts and beliefs about “White Privilege”. The more insignificant they became, the more clarity he gained.

He also gave up criticizing and feeling sorry for himself. He did journal work examining more thoughts and beliefs. In a little while he remembered everything is always working out for him. And he knew in time all this was going to turn out perfectly.

That’s exactly what happened.

One day Jarrett texted. Turns out his dad had a stroke and needed a lot of care. His family needed his help. His dad survived. But he wasn’t the same.

Jarrett and his dad blog
Jarrett and his dad sailing Achilles I. (Photo by the author)

Perry felt like a cad. Remember what we wrote about emotions! They are indicators, like an altimeter. “Feeling like a cad” is an indicator. That’s all. It was telling Perry he could feel differently about things. He only needed to think different.

· · ·

Your Broader Perspective has a bird’s eye view of your life. It knows everything you want and how to get it. It knows there are many paths to what you want.

You don’t have this perspective. You’re human. But you can access your Broader Perspective’s viewpoint. How do you know you’ve done that?

When you feel happy. Happy is the indicator.

Here’s what was great about Jarrett “disappearing”: It gave Perry time revise old disempowering beliefs. Beliefs that slow progress or lengthen the path.

Remember! You can’t live happily if you’re comparing, complaining or entertaining beliefs like “White Privilege” and “Institutional Racism”.

Yet, these things are real. But do they serve you thinking about them? Are you happy thinking about them? No one is. And if you’re not happy, you’re taking the long way. Like Perry was.

So Perry and Jarrett reconnected.  Jarrett said Achilles I was at a boat yard. He invited Perry to see it. What happened next was perfect.

 

The Grass LOOKS Greener But It Never Really Is

Boat out of barn blog
Ye ol’ Achilles I on the trailer ready to move. (Photos of Achilles by Jarrett)

We did write that the boat was free, right?

Free and over 20 years old.

Achilles I wasn’t a ready-to-sail beauty. It needed a lot of work. When Perry saw it, he immediately felt better. He was also glad he was not in Jarrett’s shoes. Achilles I’s sails housed mice for 20 years. They were chewed through, pissed on and pooped on. There were holes and repairs needed in the fiberglass hull. The electronics were kaput. Even the engine needed work.

Getting this boat for free seemed like an envy worthy event. Seeing it in person, Perry saw it much different. He had no responsibility, expense or worry about getting Achilles I ready to sail. But he still got to sail in it.

One day in the boat yard Perry confessed how he’d been thinking about all this.  “It’s ok buddy,” Jarrett said. “I want you to sail with me. I can do the repair work. You’re the only one I know who knows how to sail!”

What a nice ending to the story. Only that wasn’t the end. It got so much better!

 

Your Broader Perspective Knows “How” Better Than You

Meanwhile his Broader Perspective orchestrated other events. Perry focused being positive about his sailing partner’s good fortune. He busied himself with sailing videos. He visited sailing stores, and read about yachts online. These activities inspired him.  They also put him and his Broader Perspective in tune. That made what happened next.

Perry followed an impulse and called a yacht broker. Why not talk with someone who might sell him a boat one day, he thought. Upon hearing his story, the broker offered good advice.

“You might want to find someone willing to take you out on the open ocean,” He said. The broker recommended someone offering such services. But it cost over $4,000 a trip!

Perry wasn’t interested in that.

Meanwhile, Jarrett readied Achilles I. He planned to tow it to a boat ramp, get it in the water, then motor it the last mile into its new home at the local marina.

He needed crew. He called Perry.

What an adventure (in not a good way)! The boat did float. That’s about all. It had no navigation lights. No radio. Not even any sails!

Jarrett arrived at the ramp by 1 p.m. By five, Achilles I still wasn’t in the water. The problem? Hoisting the mast. Once they did that, they put Achilles I in.

Achiles I Blog
Jarrett, the author and his family working on Achilles I at the boat ramp. (Photo by Jarrett’s mom)

But the battery couldn’t start the engine.  Jarrett’s parents helped McGuyver the motor running just as it was getting dark. Legally, they should have had navigation lights. Jarrett figured with the motor running, they’d cover the mile before sun down.

Two thirds of the way, the motor quit. Darkness fell a long time ago. No navigation lights. No radio. No motor. No problem. They remembered a tow service emergency number stored in their phones.

Ninety minutes later, they were in the marina. The towboat captain said they were lucky they called. Even with the motor working, had they headed into the marina on their own, odds were they would have run aground.

Achilles I in the marina blog
Jarrett and Achilles I in the marina days after the night time arrival. (Photo by the author)

Did we say everything is always working out?

· · ·

A week later, Perry remembered a website talked about at class. There, people who have sail boats but no crew, and people without boats but wanting to sail could meet online. If the chemistry worked out, the yacht owner could invite the other person to sail on his yacht as crew. Perry found the site and signed up. Three weeks later, he got a call.

The guy introduced himself as Mike. He didn’t own a yacht. He did have an offer Perry couldn’t refuse. Mike told Perry he’s been on the open ocean for more than 50 years. He’s been all over the world. He told Perry he has captained nearly every kind of pleasure boat, and many commercial boats.

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Captain Mike (Photo by the author)

Mike said he owned a business moving boats around the world. He was looking for people wanting open ocean experience. You don’t need any experience, he said. In fact, it’s better if you don’t. Mike said his teams moved boats owners either didn’t have time or expertise to do it themselves.

Perry asked Mike how much it would cost him.

“Nothing,” Mike said.  “I pay all your expense. You just help me move the boat.”

Consider this: Perry didn’t know Mike. He didn’t know people do what Mike does. Perry didn’t know a guy like Mike lived not 20 miles from Perry. Perry didn’t know Mike was looking for crew.

When your Broader Perspective organizes events in your life, it works with other people’s Broader Perspectives. Your Broader Perspective has your best interests in mind. Other people’s Broader Perspectives have your interests in mind too. And vice versa.

So when a person shows up in your life, they agreed, through their Broader Perspective, to be there. In being there, they get what they are wanting. Even as you get what you want. Everyone in any situation gets the same thing: what they want.  There are no exceptions to this.

That’s how we know everything is always working out. Life is a massive collective orchestration. It’s happening between billions of Broader Perspectives. Together they coordinate innumerable events, which become life on earth.

Mike was looking for unusual people. People interested in being on the open ocean. People who had time for that. People willing to do it for no pay. People who were passionate about it and willing to not just endure but enjoy it.

In return, Mike promised adventure. He promised his crew would learn all there is to know about the open ocean. Navigation, anchoring, safety, hazards…the works.

In other words, exactly what Perry wanted.

It was a perfect fit.

Perry’s first trip was amazing. Mike, and Perry,  Jay and Curt two other volunteers, gathered at the Port of Ilwaco, Washington. Their voyage: take the “Mabel J”, a 44-foot TolleyCraft, north over 300 miles to Olympia, Washington.

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“Mabel J” being inspected by the crew. (All “ Mabel J” photos by the author)

 

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Engine oil leaks cause a plume of white smoke on startup.

This being his first trip, Perry mostly watched and took pictures. It was a pleasure cruise on a calm sea, which put an ear-to-ear grin on Perry’s face.

Every fulfilled desire contains seeds of new desires. No matter how fulfilling something is, amidst fulfillment exists desire for more. People ask “how does eternity work? Where does it come from?”

The answer is, through desire-fulfillment. New desires are born out of every fulfilled one. Life, eternal life, gets created from new desires born from within fulfilled ones.

Case in point: Perry’s first trip. It got him on the open ocean. The weather was perfect. The trip was easy, leaving lots of time for relaxation. Not more than he could handle. Just enough.

But “Mabel J” was a motor boat. Not a sail boat. The boat was old too. Engine exhaust wafted through cabins, sinking into everyone’s clothes. Everyone breathed diesel fumes the whole trip.

As far as captains go, Mike was stoic but fair. In stressful times, though he was harsh. Everyone aboard respected Mike. After all, he alone was responsible for the owner’s boat. Boats typically costing tens if not many hundreds of thousands of dollars. As captain, his crew is his responsibility too.

So he made sure everyone knew where they stood relative to his authority.

Captain is always right blog
The Captain is always right. That is, if you want to get home. (Photo by the author)

Perry didn’t like this. He prefers being his own ship’s captain. Literally and figuratively.

So here he was, getting to test himself on the open ocean. That fulfilled desire birthed more desire: Sailing his own yacht. Moving by wind, not motor. Sailing in greater luxury. Sailing on his own.

Perry’s Broader Perspective immediately realized all these desires. They would soon become Perry’s reality too. So long as Perry stayed positively focused.

So he ignored what was complaint-worthy. Instead, he put his thoughts on the voyage’s positive aspects. There were many.

For example, cruising into the Puget Sound early one morning, they had over twenty Orca sightings. That night at dinner, Perry learned people come from all over the US to see Orcas in Puget Sound. They pay hundreds to do so. But most see nothing. Not a single whale.

Perry also saw seals, sea lions and dolphin. Minke and Humpback whales too.

Top that voyage!

Broader Perspective: “Hold my beer!”

Remember, your Broader Perspective has access to infinite possibilities. Perry’s was only getting started!

Days after that trip, Mike called again. He had another assignment. Move a boat from Oxnard, California up to Puget Sound. Mike explained this was a 44-foot Mason sail boat from the mid 80s. Named “Eclipse” it’s fully equipped, ready for ocean voyages, he said. Mason 44s are well-respected and regarded open ocean sail boats. Many sailors covet them.

Mike thought it would take at least a week or two, to move her. A lot depended on the weather, which was getting worse by the day. Assignments usually diminish in winter. But the owner hoped “Eclipse” could make it north before winter storm season hit.

Mike explained the risks. He was optimistic they’d at least make it halfway. Perry was in. He was excited! In less than a month, he went from no opportunity, to nearly every opportunity.

 

The Perfect Ocean Adventure Opens Perry’s Eyes

The crew took Amtrak south to Oxnard.

Mike first reserved business class for himself, coach class for his crew. Perry asked if he could pay the extra $50 for business class. Business class is more comfortable. Mike said it wasn’t. Prior to departure, Mike changed his mind. To the crew’s surprise and pleasure everyone had business-class tickets. The business car was quieter and more comfortable.

Rail travel was an adventure in itself. Perry was born in California. Traveling by rail afforded many stops in towns reminiscent of home, including Davis, San Jose, San Luis Obispo and Van Nuys. They served surprisingly good food in the dining car, which Perry enjoyed. He also met and talked with many people who had great stories. There was plenty time too to relax and read and watch California’s desert scenery.

It was a literal vacation. And another desire fulfilled: Perry always wanted to travel through California by rail.

Three days later they arrived at the Marina in Oxnard late that night. They put their gear aboard “Eclipse”, then slept the first night on the boat.

The next morning, Perry explored “Eclipse” in daylight. Its blue hull shined in the California sun. Her hull contrasted nicely with its white and grey decks and golden varnished wood accents. As advertised, “Eclipse” had all kinds of equipped, including an autopilot. Autopilot meant the boat could hold its own course, making hand-steering infrequent. A nice luxury.

“How fun it’s going be!” Perry thought. Then he thought about “Mabel J”. Would this trip be better? He counted on it.

And it was.

Mike, a master weather navigator, threaded needles between storm fronts. When that wasn’t possible, they waited out storms in safe anchorages.

As we said before, every fulfilled dream contains seeds of more desire. Living aboard “Eclipse” was not the dream experience Perry imagined. Modern sail boats look like Manhattan Apartments on the inside. They’re beautiful, with their light colors, lots of windows and amenities like microwaves, TVs, washing machines and more.

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Interior of a modern ocean cruiser, the CNB 66. (Photo from CNB 66 Promotional brochure. Fair use assessment on file – educational purposes)

This boat’s traditional mariner interior was no doubt beautiful…to some people. To Perry’s champagne tastes, it was worn, cramped, dark. The bathroom was filthy. It reeked of old piss. At anchor, the boat rocked constantly. Its water and fuel tanks sloshed so loud, it was hard to sleep. Sleeping aboard was uncomfortable. Far more uncomfortable than sleeping aboard “Mabel J”. Especially with four other people on a boat really built to accommodate three max. Had Perry not been exhausted each night, sleeping would have been impossible.

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The dark, nearly window-less, dank interior of a mid-1980s blue ocean sailboat. (Photo by the author)

Worse, still, Perry got seasick. A lot. The sea was rough most the way. While admiring the view, or standing at the helm, he was fine. The moment he focused on a task – raising a sail, coiling a rope, even taking off his rain gear below – he got sea sick.

Motion sickness pills didn’t help. Natural remedies like ginger didn’t either.

Then one night, mid way through, Mike made a calculation error. Winds were stronger than expected. Ocean swells were higher than expected too. Then it got dark. Twenty-five knot winds blew “Eclipse” in circles despite the crew’s best efforts to keep her on course.

A sail jammed. Motoring now, all hands kept watch.  Making matters more hairy, crab season started the same week. Commercial fishermen laid hundreds of crab pots along their course. Darkness made seeing their floating buoys near-impossible. Running over one put the pot’s line inline with the boat’s propeller. If the prop got jammed with rope…

Perry didn’t want to think about that.

Usually, Mike stayed below, monitoring charts and catching shut-eye in case an emergency commanded his attention. Not tonight. Over the next three hours, Mike, who is probably near 80, stood at the front of the cockpit, peering through a tiny night vision scope yelling commands to Perry at the helm.

“Turn right!”

“Hard right now! now! now!”

“Left, left, left, now!!!”

“ Nooooo…RIGHT!”

As we’re writing this through Perry’s fingers, he’s smiling. It was something to smile about…after it was over. That night though, no one was laughing. Especially Mike.

Finally, Mike had enough of Perry’s novice steering skills. He called Oneonta to replace him. After a few moments though she was relieved. Jay, the senior crew member, took over. But even he had trouble. Mike was beyond stressed. But Jay, having three trips with Mike under his belt, took it in stride.

It was a harrowing experience right until they pulled into safe harbor around 2 a.m. The physical and psychological strain took its toll on everyone. Especially Mike. Once tied to the dock, he collapsed against the cabin, clearly wiped out.

So was everyone else. Next morning, Mike decreed there’d be no more sailing through the night.

· · ·

The weather picture up north cut the trip short. They left “Eclipse” in Crescent City, California. Perry was glad to be on land again after five days at sea and 10 days away from home. He was exhausted. He never wanted to see “Eclipse” again.

On their six-hour drive back to Portland, he remembered what Jay suggested that dangerous night.

“I think you might want to rethink being on the open ocean,” Jay said.

Sound advice, Perry thought.

open ocean quote blogPerry got what he wanted. He also learned something. Maybe, he thought, he isn’t fit for the open ocean. That lesson cost him nothing. He had a (mostly) great time.

More important, he saved a lot of money. He prepared to spend millions on his dream yacht.

Did this mean the end of his sailing adventure?

Nope. Every fulfilled desire sows seeds of more desires.

Before leaving “Eclipse” Perry talked with Mike about his seasickness. Mike said most people get over seasickness. Mike said doctors don’t really know very much about why seasickness happens. In his 50 years on the world’s oceans, with dozens of different people, Mike thinks it’s caused by stress. Not ocean conditions.

On Perry’s first open ocean trip, he didn’t get seasick. The second where there was far more stress and danger. Seasick a-plenty.

Who knows? Maybe Mike is right.

· · ·

Months later, Perry thought about that conversation. He thought about how stressful it was crewing for Mike. He thought about how uncomfortable it felt being out of his element. On the open ocean for the second time, first time on a sail boat. He wondered how much being on a boat owned by someone else made it more stressful. He thought how serving under an authority added more stress. He thought about that harrowing night. That alone was stressful!

The more he thought about this, the more he realized this adventure might not be over.  He needed more experience. Under different, less stressful conditions. Like Hawaii maybe. 😀🏝

You never reach the end of anything. Life is eternal. Its eternity springs from your desires. Everyone has endless desires. Today Perry attends to his companies, following impulses from his Broader Perspective. His main goal in life is being happy. He knows what happiness means. Being happy lets him know his path will consistently yield happy experiences.

Everything you do in the end is about being happy. People usually do things they think will “make them happy”. Perry figured out life works best the other way around. Being happy first IS being happy. From there you can’t help having experiences matched to that.

We wrote a great piece about how to use happiness the way it’s intended. It’s easy. It results come in seconds. (HT – Abraham-Hicks)

You now know what modern life, motivational speakers and “successful people” don’t. You don’t have to set an intention, make goals and objectives, put them on a timeline, track your progress, and then work your ass off.

You can keep your ass and be successful. Just be happy first. Then watch what happens.

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