The best result of being Positively Focused happens when people make the world the way I want it. Even complete strangers. When people show up in what seems like magical ways, I know I’m doing this whole “manifesting” business right.
The more it happens, the more I want to keep it up. I’m discovering a brand new kind of life. A life where everything I want happens with no effort.
I know. I write “effortlessly” and “no effort” a lot.
I wouldn’t use those words if they weren’t accurate.
What happened to me last week shows how through little effort people show up for me at the right time and the right place.
Last Monday, I went to a meeting at the local LGBTQIA community center. I’m getting closer to the community this way. This is the second or third meeting I’ve attended. This week, over half the people there were new. One of the people was a shy transgender woman just starting out in her transition.
When the meeting ended, she stood in the doorway as most people left. I stayed too. I was talking with another attendee and the meeting organizer. I got an impulse about this person in the doorway. It told me I would be speaking with her.
· · ·
I share a lot about how I follow my intuition. That’s because it is how my Broader Perspective tells me where to go what to do and who to talk with to get what I want.
Two things must happen to hear my intuition: first, I must learn to hear or feel the impulses. Second, I must learn to tell the difference between impulses and other voices in my head. Voices that aren’t intuition. Meditation helps a lot with that. So does practice or trial and error.
I think the main reason people don’t trust their intuition is because they haven’t practiced these two steps. So they think intuition is random at best. Or a trick of the mind at worst.
So here I was in this room. My impulse telling me to talk to this person. I wanted to talk with her. But I’m also engaged in another conversation. Not to worry, my intuition says, I’ll meet her again.
What happened next needs some context.
· · ·
I usually ride my bike to get places. Other times I ride the bus. Rarely do I go by car.
There are 84 bus lines operating in the city where I live on any given day. Even if only two buses serve those lines each day, that’s almost two hundred buses moving around Portland. There’s also a street car and a light rail as well as many shuttles operating. Every day.
But there are more than two buses per line. Some lines have many more than four. There are literally hundreds of buses running around Portland at any given time.
Ok, that’s the context. Back to my story…
I had finished a great day at my bridging job. I felt high and happy. I wasn’t trying to make anything happen. I wasn’t even thinking about this transgender woman.
I got on the first bus of my 2-bus trip from work. I was listening to a podcast I enjoy. And I was thinking about how cool it was that I got two more informal offers for promotion at that job. And I’d only been there two weeks.
So I got off the first bus. I waited a few minutes until the second bus came. While waiting, I suddently started thinking about being transamorous. I thought about the places I might meet transgender people. I thought this way for about 10 minutes. Then, the image of that transgender woman from the meeting came into my head. Then the bus came.
It stopped in front of me. The doors opened and…you guessed it: there she was.
She wasn’t just on the bus. She was driving the bus!
· · ·
Those of you unclear about how matter, events, circumstances and people become life experience might say “Perry, you’re crazy. That’s just coincidence.”
But it’s not coincidence.
This is how everything happens. Evidence is overwhelming. When I connect to my Broader Perspective, I can control what comes into my life.
“Sarah” and I had a great conversation the whole way to where I live. I’m sure I’ll see her again. I encouraged her to come back to the meeting next month. But the fact that she drives the bus line I ride home on pretty much assures me I’ll see her either way.
This is happening all the time in my life.
For example, this week on several occasions, incredible synchronicities happened between me and complete strangers. Since I spend a lot of the day at work, that’s where most is happening.
I drove up to one customer’s house, for example. I called her to let her know I was arriving. Most doing this job say the customer hardly ever picks up the phone. This customer answered immediately. When she came outside, she told me “it’s so strange. I had my phone in my hands when you called. I was looking right at it.”
How’s that for perfect timing?
In another example, I needed to deliver three packages in a secured apartment building. But I couldn’t get in because there was no intercom. At just that moment, a resident showed up. She let me in. I’m sure she wasn’t supposed to do that. 😀
Walking down the hall, I delivered one package. The next package too. The last package needed to be delivered in person. But the person wasn’t there. I walked back towards the elevator and this woman was coming out. I had an intuition this was the customer. I asked her if she lived in that one apartment. She asked why and I told her. Turns out, she was the customer!
Then I drove up to this house with a gate. I didn’t have the gate code. I couldn’t leave the package outside the gate. Someone would steal it. Just then, (I swear!) a woman drove up. It was the homeowner. We completed the transaction and my trainee said “that was good timing”.
Exactly, I thought.
There are so many things like good timing happening in my life. It’s happening in your life too. The more you pay attention to these the more happen. The less you pay attention to negative things happening, the less they happen.
I know it’s really about focus. Everything is happening all the time. Both positive and negative. The question is, what set of happenings are you paying attention to?
I know I have the option. I can see all the negative, discouraging, bad things happening in life. There are a lot of those things. Or I can turn my attention to all the positive, empowering, uplifting things happening in life. There are a lot of those things too.
I know whichever I put focus on is what I see the most. So it makes sense to me to pay attention to what I’m wanting to see and experience. And put no attention at all on what I don’t want to see.
So my life “trues up” to that. It gets better and better. For someone who doesn’t know this, life just looks random and coincidental. Life is not random or coincidental. Everyone creates their reality.
Are you missing out on the greatest adventure ever that is your life?
The Universe amazes me in small ways. These small ways are how I know that big things I want are coming. Because of that, I rest easy about life most of the time.
I’m getting better at making “resting easy” my full-time attitude. I know the better I get at that, the more I’ll see how much my personal trinity showers me with blessings.
Characteristic of my trinity is its recursivity. They’re like a fractal. Every part of my life, large or small, reflects that which makes up All That Is, the Universe and my Inner Being. As well as the processes used which make reality reality.
It’s why I know things always work out.
Case in point: one Thursday not too long ago. It was an amazing day. Full of epiphanies and one of three peak days that week. I’ll share the whole, fascinating story in a couple months. Things are still “unfolding” as they say.
Today I’ll tease you with one nugget.
When You Think, It Is.
A bicycle is my primary transportation mode. Portland is bike friendly. People ride bikes year round here, even though it rains most the year. In late spring though, it’s perfect riding weather. Not too cold or hot. Not as much rain. That brings out a lot of “fair weather riders”.
I mean, I do ride in the rain sometimes…
Anyway, Thursday I was riding home from a couple great appointments. Downtown Portland, where the meetings were, is about six miles from where I live. I love taking this route home. It’s just long enough to get a workout, but not so long it exhausts me.
I got my bike tuned up a couple seasons ago, making a fresh tune up past due. As I rode up a hill on the way home, the gears shifted on their own, making a loud racket and causing a hitch in my bike get-along.
I thought “hmm. My bike needs a tune up.”
That’s all that happened. Something happened in physical reality. Then in my head a thought occurred.
I’ve noticed something while getting better at creating reality. If I ever-so-briefly hold an idea of what I want, then let it go, that thing I want happens fast. Usually within the day.
If I stew about what I want, if I keep thinking about it, it usually takes much longer to happen. Strange, isn’t it?
I think that happens because, in the first case, I don’t put attention on the absence of what I want. I don’t have time to think about it. The thought comes. Then goes.
So it’s a pure request. Unhindered by negative thought. I’m told that if a request is pure, it is answered immediately. Resistance is inherent to physical reality. So I don’t expect instant manifestation. Same-day manifestation is pretty quick though.
Bigger things I want, such as a huge amount of money, are taking longer only because my old beliefs slow things down. But I’m getting better about letting those beliefs subside. I’m also getting better at replacing them with ones more consistent with what I want.
Old beliefs like “I have to work a job to get money” I’m replacing with “money naturally happens in my life”. Beliefs like “it’s impossible to just have money show up like magic” I’m replacing with “everything is possible”.
How do I know this process works? Because more things are happening like what I’m sharing.
So on Thursday, when I thought about needing a bike tune up, the thought came. I thought it. Then let it go. I didn’t think about how much tune ups cost. I didn’t think about the hassle of scheduling one. I didn’t think about being without my primary (and most enjoyable) transportation.
Three quarters of a mile down the road something happened. I’m among a group of riders. We’re all heading from downtown. It’s after five. Bicycle commuters are overflowing the bike lane. It’s a normal late Portland Spring day.
Except, it’s not normal.
Three quarters of a mile past that hill where my gears puttered, there’s a guy on the road’s shoulder. He has a bike stand – one of those things you clip a bike to that suspends bikes in the air so you can work on them. He’s in shorts, t-shirt and blue latex gloves. At his ankles is a sign. It reads something like “Get bike advice”.
I ride past him.
In the 12 + years I’ve taken this route home, never have I seen this guy. Yet, here he is. On this day. Passing him, I get an intuition to turn back. It’s a strong one.
My Inner Being has written in this blog about “intuitions” and “impulses”. They say these are communications from them. Urgings which, if followed, lead me towards what I’m wanting. So many times over the years, following their urgings resulted in surprising and delightful encounters. Encounters with people. Encounters with circumstances and events which, like they promise, end with me getting what I want.
So when I rode past Dan (his real name), my intuition pinged. Hard. I couldn’t resist turning back.
Of course, I’m not always great at following my intuitive impulses. Sometimes I miss them. Sometimes I hear them, then don’t follow them. Lately, my Inner Being has been urging me about getting better at immediately following these impulses.
Given ambitions I have, I know they’re helping me get better at this. They know doing so will get me what I want even faster than it happens today. Which already is pretty fast. This story is a great example. In fact, the whole week overflowed with poignant results. Results you just can’t make up!
About half a mile past Dan, I decided to turn back. When I returned, I asked Dan if he would be willing to tune my gears up. And if so, how much he’d charge me.
“Yes I can tune them,” he said. “I’ll also show you how to do it. And, I’m not wanting any money. I’m doing this to help riders. That’s all.”
That’s all? Wow, I thought. That’s AWESOME.
When he said that, I knew this was the Universe responding to my “request”. After the week I was having. After the day I was having, how could it not be?
Only after hearing Dan say this did I realize a couple things. One, I was willing to pay a bike shop like $100 to get my bike tuned up. Two, I also thought about looking on YouTube to learn how to do it myself. My Inner Being knew all this, and here they delivered an “in-person YouTube” lesson!
And you know what? Tuning up bike gears is easy!
Dan showed me how to do it. It took a minute or less. I shook my head. To think I was willing to pay someone almost $100 for a minute’s work when the Universe organized it at no cost!
My ride home after that felt like floating on a cloud. I was on a natural high.
· · ·
It’s these demonstrations which tell me I’m connected to my personal warehouse of blessings. That and how I feel on the daily. I’m feeling happier and happier the more I maintain positive focus. My Inner Being tells me there’s no upper limit how happy I can get. I think that’s so cool.
The more happy I get, the more my personal trinity, in small and large ways, shows me that life is easy. It shows me I can relax in my blessedness.
It’s these small events, happening more and more these days, which tell me my bigger desires are on their way too.
For me, manifestation is great. But manifestations are the spice which make the main event tasty. The main event, where I put most of my attention these days, is how great I feel. I feel great knowing the Universe not only has my back, it’s got my entire life in its hands.
So I can rest easy.
Everyone will realize true freedom when they die. They return to nonphysical. From there they see all their worries and concerns were about nothing.
Sometimes, people get that before they die. Realization comes at different times for different people. You might have an argument with your spouse, for example. You might become awakened in prison. Or it might come through repeated experiences. Experiences repeating because you’re not getting the message.
Perry is telling more of his stories now. But we’ll still chime in from time to time. Today, we are sharing what happened when Perry recently had all three of these.
His story shows how your larger self (that’s us to Perry) organizes life so you can let go of beliefs holding you back. For Perry, letting go sometimes takes longer than we’d like.
He comes around eventually. Sometimes, as you’ll read, we go through extraordinary measures to get him there. He can be stubborn.
Hard Times Are Unnecessary. But They Serve A Purpose
Perry and his wife have been strained as of late. His wife is exasperated with Perry’s focus on everything other than creating an income. It’s been a while. To Bridget, his wife, it’s been too long.
Bridget knows, as Perry does, whatever a person puts their attention on enlarges. Even if what you’re attending to is something you don’t want. Such as your spouse not bringing in an income, that thing will get bigger. Or in this case, take longer.
Sometimes, people don’t get the message until the circumstance gets unbearably difficult. This was the case with Perry’s wife. She was beside herself in frustration. In literal agony at times. And she took it out on Perry.
But Perry, knowing what he knows ignored his wife’s protests. He has seen too much evidence what he’s doing is working. “Working” meaning leading to more and more prosperity, plenty and joy for him, but also for his wife. Even though that doesn’t include manifested income…yet.
So when her frustration boils over, Perry goes Missing in Action (MIA). He gets as far from her as he can. Until the boiling stops.
Sometimes that’s a long time.
· · ·
Several weeks ago, things came to a head. Bridget was trying to use her anger and frustration to goad Perry. She hoped that would get her what she wanted: for Perry to get a job.
Goading is a terrible way to get what you want from someone. The person digs in their heels. You get more frustrated. Nobody wins.
Perry wasn’t changing course anyway. Instead, he let her know what we had been telling him all along:
From Perry’s perspective, he is 100 percent responsible for how his wife is treating him. In fact, as we have said to him, his wife’s anger and frustration about his lack of income is a reflection in Perry’s physical reality of his own beliefs about money, success prosperity and how to get it.
Everything in Perry’s reality reflects back to him his own beliefs about reality. Including how other people treat him. Perry is long down that path of getting that. But he’s not an expert yet.
Yet, when Perry realized his wife’s frustrations reflected back his own, he shared it with his wife. That created a breakthrough for her.
The next day, Perry’s wife sent the following:
This card is part of a deck Perry’s wife bought that day. Buying the deck was an act inspired by her larger perspective. They were communicating a way out of her frustration and pain and struggle. A way that didn’t rely on Perry doing anything different.
After getting that message, things between Perry and his wife have been on the mend. The story isn’t over. But for now, some peace has returned.
· · ·
To get where he wants financially, Perry must let go of past hurts and transgressions. Hurts and transgressions he believes his wife caused him. Afterall, everything his wife “did to him” is a reflection of something going on inside Perry. It’s hard to hear when you’re on the receiving end of what you think is vile behavior from someone who says they love you.
But it’s 100 percent accurate. How someone treats you reflects something going on inside you.
An Miff Over Text Sets It Up
Some time back, a friend of Perry’s sent him an email. This friend met someone while recording a podcast about entrepreneurs in prison. This person, let’s call her Joy, is transgender. This friend thought she’d make a great guest for Perry’s YouTube show.
So Perry got this email in his inbox.
He set up time to visit Joy in prison.
The day of the visit came. Perry got ready. When he got in the car, which he and his wife share, the tank was on empty. One day late last year, when Perry left the car in a similar state, his wife raked him over the coals. He had a reasonable explanation. But she wasn’t having it. When a person rakes you over the coals, especially disproportionate to your “offense”, there is always something more going on than what you’ve done.
In Perry’s case back then, Bridget’s anger comprised all her frustration with Perry over the years. And her own personal issues which were particularly strong that day. But Perry too played a role in that. His focus on his wife’s negativity is well-practiced. So his focus momentum matches both Perry and Bridget when they’re not at their best. Relationships are always 100 percent. Each party is 100 percent responsible for what’s happening.
Perry was holding onto that past empty-tank raking over the coals experience. So when he saw the tank was near empty, two things happened.
One, he didn’t get mad, which was good. But he didn’t think about what he did next. Well, he thought about it. But not long enough to avoid doing what he did. What he did was send his wife a picture and text message:
He was not mad. But he couldn’t let go of what happened before. He still held onto his anger and outrage that his wife would get so bent out of shape over something so trivial. He didn’t realize there was more behind her frustration than an empty gas tank.
So he sent this text out of his past hurt and frustration.
Like Perry had, Bridget too had a good reason for leaving the car empty. Perpetrators have reasonable explanations. Reasonable for them. Not the “victim”: the person who now must put gas in the tank.
Perry went to fill the tank, then headed to prison. Little did he know he was already imprisoned. Imprisoned by his old ways of thinking and being. Thankfully, that was about to change.
A Big Surprise Behind Bars
Perry has never been to actual prison. The experience fascinated him. He checked in, got a visitor badge. He had to leave his phone in the car. He also had to dress a certain way. He needed to stand out from inmates, in case there was a problem.
People’s kindness on the inside surprised him. Unlike the movies, people were friendly and conversational. Security was there, but minimal.
Joy participates in a special discussion group. It was the only time Perry and Joy could meet. Perry hoped Joy would be an open book as a guest. He knew she’d have great stories. But he didn’t know if Joy would be willing to share them.
What happened next blew his mind.
Inmates filed into the chapel’s meeting room. About six, all men except Joy and Perry’s escort.
The escort also leads the discussion. She briefly mentioned Perry then asked people to introduce themselves. That’s when it happened.
Each person, to a person talked about “insights” they were getting. They talked about realizing their thoughts create their reality. Each described how calm and peaceful their lives became from participating in the group.
“What is this group?” Perry thought.
It’s called Insight Alliance. Group members take part in experiential learning. They talk about taking responsiblity for creating their reality. And how that reality shows up from the thoughts they think. Thoughts that if left unchecked, will run amok. Which create lives run amok.
Not only did this surprise him, but Perry also felt self-conscious. That’s because he realized something sitting there listening to the inmates. He wasn’t taking responsibility for thoughts creating the reality that is his wife.
Perry was chagrined (I was!). “If people in prison were realizing their reality is their creation, taking responsiblity for that and letting go of the past, what excuse do I have?” He thought. “Why am I holding on to something Bridget did months ago?”
When his turn came, Perry gave a lengthy self-introduction. Including information about the economic system he expects will replace capitalism in the future, his work with the transgender community and his blog Positively Focused. He didn’t mention the epiphany he had just had.
Then the meeting got underway.
While listening, Perry also saw that “inmates” are people. They are smart. They are thoughtful. They’re not bad. Perry’s preconceived notions evaporated.
And, Joy turned out to be just that. Perry was right: she had a ton of great stories. And, she said, she is an open book. Totally willing to share pretty much everything.
But wait! We’re not finished. More surprises were in store.
The Best Conversation About Capitalism Happened In Prison
After 70 minutes or so, the sharing petered out. That’s when one inmate said something Perry wasn’t expecting.
“I am dying to hear about this new economic system of yours,” he said.
All eyes were on him.
“Go ahead,” his escort said. “Tell us. I’m dying to know too!”
What followed was one of the most inspiring, fulfilling conversations about Perry’s idea.
He described how the system works. Then participants started telling Perry how it would work under various scenarios. Everyone was leaning in. They talked about how the transition could happen. How raw materials and supplies used to make things would be given to people making things (at no cost to anyone). How everyone on the planet could get their food, clothing, shelter, all their education, and all their healthcare at no cost to anyone…with no one footing the bill for those things. And how all that could transform life on Earth.
One guy didn’t get it. He dreams of becoming a rancher. He couldn’t understand how anyone would give him cows for free to ranch. The others tried explaining, but he couldn’t put it together in his head.
Still, Perry’s surprise was obvious. Never had a group got possibility so fast. And these were inmates, Perry thought.
By the time Perry got to his car, he felt far different about inmates. He also felt different about his wife. So he sent this:
Your reality reflects your beliefs. This happens so you can expand into greater harmony with your larger perspective. That is what life is all about.
Perry’s day in prison shows how we coordinate events so he can see what he can’t see. Many humans can’t see what’s happening inside them. And they don’t know why physical reality exists. So the go through their lives significantly handicapped.
Being Positively Focused brings back ability. You start seeing life as it’s mean to be seen. From that, you can live as intended. With joy and real freedom.
It doesn’t matter when or where you are. Joy and freedom are available. Some people get it in prison. Some get it visiting prison. Others might get it fighting with their wife. Everyone gets it when they die.
But you don’t have to wait until you die to get it. You can get it starting today.
This is a metaphorical view of something real and tangible. It is what all beings have. And it can be used to create any life you desire. This is what I refer to in my blogs. Enjoy.
[There be spoilers ahead]
So Game of Thrones is over. What a finale. Danny dead. Jon Snow exiled. Arya off on adventure. The hound…Queen Cersei…well…you know.
But producers hid the biggest GOT story right in plain sight. As much as it was a fantasy, Game of Thrones is faithful to reality. And if you got that, well, you walked away from season eight’s final episode as I did.
With a huge freaking grin and insanely inspired.
There’s Nothing Like A Story
In one of the show’s best monologues Tyrian Lannister tells the story of Bran the Broken. Soon to be chosen as king of the six realms, Bran began the show as what seemed like a minor character.
But that minor part became the major story. And this is the hidden gem. Namely: You can work your ass off and still not be king. Better put: Do nothing and you will be king.
That’s exactly what Bran did. After being pushed off a window ledge at Winterfell, it seemed Bran’s life was over. He ended up a coma. Then paralyzed. He got out of the coma. Only to learn he’d be forever in a wheel chair.
Which forced him to go spiritual. With nary a limb he could flex, he turned to flexing his consciousness. Then he began probing spiritual mysteries.
What he found helped him marshal forces of destiny. He used them, moving with All That Is as it used other people to do its bidding. Through that connection, Bran became not only Bran the Broken, king of the six realms. He also became Bran the Invincible.
Even facing the Night King, the most fearsome foe in the whole show, Bran prevailed.
Note how everyone moved in Bran’s favor while at the same time serving their own purposes. A assassin tried killing him but a massive hound rips his throat out. Wildlings tried killing him. Theon Greyjoy and Rob rush to his rescue. When Theon takes Winterfell, he survives thanks to Osha’s help.
In every adverse situation, Bran maintained connection with his larger self. His larger self giving insight into the next steps. His larger self directing others in Bran’s defense. Meanwhile Bran relied on inner knowing telling him where to be. Who to speak with. What to say.
All without lifting a finger, arm, leg or sword, Bran became leader of the realm.
GOT is great fantasy. It’s also excellent commentary on reality. GOT is allegory. You have Bran’s ability. I notice this ability unfolding in my own life. Me and my Inner Being write about such experiences throughout this blog.
Here we describe how I choose an outcome. Then I connect with the universe, All That Is and my Inner Being, all representing my larger self. I communicate my desire. Then watch as my personal trinity orchestrates the world around me. Including people and events. Orchestrated in such a way that what I chose becomes my reality.
Action Is Overrated
Contrast Bran’s story with that of Jon Snow, or any other action-oriented GOT character. Jon, the best swordsman. Admired. A master strategist. Handsome. A courageous fighter. Death-defying…and legitimate and rightful heir to the Iron Throne.
All that action-based, work your ass off effort he was known for got him nothing. Nothing except cold days and nights in exile with the wildlings. Not so bad considering that hunk of a guy Tormund Giantsbane. And if there are more beauties like Ygritte there.
Far from becoming king though.
Sure he didn’t want it. But that’s not the point.
The point is, focus on connecting with your deeper self. That larger part of you remaining in the spiritual world. When you do, you’ll discover profound insights. Insights about yourself. Insights about the world and people around you.
When you do, you’ll discover just how much influence you have over the world around you. You become king. King of the largest realm there is. The realm of your subjective reality. Which includes all you’re capable of perceiving.
You’ll also perceive something else. That you are surrounded by messages encouragingi to look within. Especially movies and art.
Game of Thrones was a thrill ride. A great story. A wonderful character exploration. But if you missed what you just read, you just got entertained.
Instead of getting inspired.
The best happiness is conjured. It’s how I get things easily. Getting what I want should be easy. That’s the way life can be for everyone. For me it is.
It hasn’t always been easy. I had to learn how reality happens before getting what I want came easily. I appreciate what I learned. So I’m sharing it.
In the old days I didn’t know all this. By “old days” I mean a few years ago. 😀
Back then, I got a lot of what I wanted and some of what I didn’t. I got that the same way you likely do. Random!
I became pretty successful, but it was hard work, struggle, sacrifice.
Instead of talking about the old days, I want to talk about today’s days. But I guess I can’t without referring a little bit to the old days for context. 🤷🏽♂️
How Do Things Happen?
First, let me clarify something: Getting what I want means creating reality.
Many people scoff when “new agers” talk about “creating reality” and “manifesting”. Here’s the thing about that.
A lot of what I want is “real”. Physical events, physical things and, yes, some intangible things too. Like peace of mind. And understanding how life works.
But everything I want, including intangible stuff, must happen in the physical world. I call that “reality”. You probably call it that too.
So getting what I want means experiencing realities different from what I have. New realities that include in them what I want. Somehow, those realities must come about.
How do they come? Aren’t they being created? If so, who or what creates them?
I explored these questions some time ago. I’m glad I got super-clear answers.
· · ·
So when I talk about getting what I want, I’m talking about creating new realities. Realities that weren’t realities before. I’m at the center of “how”. And I’m getting better proving to myself how that “how” works.
Fig. 1 below shows how I used to create reality. I call it “The Haphazard Way”. Here’s how that process worked for me. Maybe it works for you this way.
Reality Needs A Perceiver And It Shapes That Which Perceives
Reality doesn’t exist if there is no perceiver. So reality needs a perceiver for it to “be”. Any consciousness capable of perception will do. In Fig. 1, I’m using me as the perceiver. But it could as well be a dog, bird, cockroach or single-celled organism.
In The Haphazard Way, as perceiver, I look at the world (Step 1 in Fig. 1) and see what’s happening. From that, I choose what I want.
For example, when I was young, I realized having money was a good thing. In high school, I looked at professions where my talents (love of writing, art, etc) would pay most. Then I planned my life to match that trajectory.
So far so good.
But while spending so much time looking at the world, I also couldn’t help see how other people got what I wanted. Sounds normal, right? You set a goal, then look at others’ success as a model for yours.
The problem is, I’m not here to copy what others did. I thought I was. And I succeeded at that for a while. It wasn’t fulfilling though.
I’m a creator. I’m here to do it my way. A fresh way. You are a creator too. You’re not here to copy others.
Besides, the majority of humans (like 99.999 percent) create what they want haphazardly (Fig. 1). That works. But it’s not easy. That’s why so many people describe getting what they want as “working your ass off,” “sacrificing”, “paying your dues”, etc. Then they feel proud about that.
Why would I want to copy that? If they knew what I now know, I don’t think they’d feel proud.
But it’s what they know. So I don’t blame them. Instead I say “more power to you!” Because they’re going to need it.
In their reality (Fig. 1), working your ass off (or who you know, or having money, or paying your dues or whatever) is necessary. It’s necessary because they’ve looked at how others have done it. And they are copying that.
I was doing the same. Here’s why I don’t do that now.
Living Other People’s Experience By Default
When I copied another’s way, I also accepted their beliefs about reality. Everybody’s doing that. Which is why we have the world we have where pretty much everyone thinks the same way about reality. I thought that way too.
Back to fig. 1: Looking at the world (Step 1) formed beliefs within me consistent with what I was looking at (Step 2). Including other people’s beliefs. If I believed as everyone else, my actions would match everyone else (Step 3). Not my original, pure inspirations.
Beliefs dictate actions in The Haphazard Way
My actions reflected what I believed. Next I’d look at results my actions created (Step 4) to check (Step 5) if they matched my expectations. “Expectations” is another word for “beliefs about the future”. Based on beliefs I got from others, I formed beliefs about the future containing what my acts should produce.
Make sense so far?
Here’s the problem. My adopted beliefs included ways to get what I want. But they also included negative beliefs about the world. About me too.
A major negative belief about the world, which I adopted from others was “there’s only so much to go around”. Another: “I’m in competition for those limited things, whether it’s money, women, cars, etc.” Another: “money doesn’t grow on trees” meaning: it’s scarce.
These are beliefs new agers call “scarcity consciousness”. They make an unlimited thing limited.
My beliefs also included other people’s beliefs about people like me. For example, I had a lot of negative beliefs about being African American and queer. These negative beliefs shaped my self-worth, self-respect and, most important, what I thought was possible.
Maybe you have these too. Where do these come from? I got them looking at the world. I listened to what my parents’ said about the world and believed them. I watched their personal experiences, then formed beliefs from that. I got beliefs from my personal experience. I shaped beliefs listening to TV and radio. I got beliefs from reading stuff.
In other words, I got my beliefs from looking at the world around me (Step 1).
How about you? Where do your beliefs come from? Have you thought about that? Some people I talk with are open enough to say they get their beliefs the same way I did. “I was raised to believe…” is how it usually starts.
Maybe you were “raised to believe…” a certain way too…
Back to Fig. 1.
So when I checked my progress (or lack thereof), I would make up stories reflecting my messed up (inaccurate) beliefs. “This happened because I was black” or, “I can’t do that right” or, “I wish I could do it like that guy”, or “I need money to do that and I don’t have money so…”
The thing is, the world I saw matched beliefs I had. It’s tricky to sort out beliefs I hold from the world I see. They are so intertwined. In reality, they are one. They both reflect each to the other. I know that now.
So no matter what happened from my actions, I interpreted them according to my beliefs. I still do that. That can’t be helped. Life will always reflect my beliefs.
But today, I have a whole new set of beliefs. They come from a new way of creating reality.
What’s interesting is, I wouldn’t have my new way, were it not for the old way.
Life will not differ from how I believe. “Life” is the cycle illustrated in Fig. 1 and 2. Both cycles repeat themselves over and over. Beliefs become automatic. Acts born of beliefs recede into the background. What’s left are results and interpretations.
If I want any part of my reality different, I must change my beliefs. To change beliefs, I must know how they happen. Then use that process differently.
That’s where Fig. 2 comes in.
The World Turns From One Thing I See To The Next
I questioned early on why things happened the way they did. So The Haphazard Way helped me. It’s not wrong. I think it serves this exact purpose.
I’m not the only person who knows about this. More are learning it all the time. Here’s how it works:
First, I look at the world (Step 1). But I don’t accept that world as factual. Instead I look at what is and use it to decide not only what I want, but how I would like it to happen.
I don’t think about the specifics of how it could happen. I only think about how it would feel to have what I want (Step 1).
Once I figure that out, I choose beliefs (Step 2) consistent with what I want. I literally make up beliefs. The more original the better. The beliefs boost the feelings.
Next I hold the feelings the beliefs have boosted. I keep feeling the feelings. I pay as little attention as I can to current reality. Including the fact that it doesn’t contain what I want. I don’t think about what I want either. I only feel how it feels having what I want.
I’m not always successful. But you’d be surprised how little success is needed for this to work.
If/when I’m successful with Fig. 2 Step 2, the universe and the larger part that is me gives feedback, suggestions and impulses about acts to take (Step 3). I try never to act unless I get inspiration. This is important.
Sometimes it takes a long time before I get inspiration. Just ask my wife! 😜
Other times, inspiration comes immediately.
Sometimes I have to sort out where the inspiration is coming from. Old beliefs sometimes draw ideas to me. They sound like “you should be doing….”
The right inspiration doesn’t sound that way.
When right inspiration does come, I try to act immediately (Step 4). Next, I do my best to not look for evidence my acts create. I don’t check. Instead, I use observing the world as fuel. Fuel for more made up beliefs. Beliefs consistent with the reality I am creating, rather than the one I’m looking at.
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My Inner Being has written in this blog about some results this process produced. It’s going to continue doing that. So many things are happening all the time.
Life has changed for me since using this process. Most important, I’m finding myself happier. Not because I’m getting more of what I want easier, which I am. But because when I’m spending most of my time focusing on positive beliefs, how can that not become a habit? And how can a positive focus turned habitual not produce a reality consistent with that? And how can that not create a happy life?
That’s conjured happiness.
In the end, I want what I want because I think I’ll be happier getting that. When I’m positively focused, I’m already happy. That’s the best place from which to have what I want show up. It takes out the yearning that happens when I seek happiness in getting things.
The best happiness is conjured happiness. I know that now. And thank goodness that I do because it makes getting things easy.