TL;DR: In this fifth part of a six-part series, the author recounts how a funeral cracked open a deeper truth for his business-owner client: our judgments blind us to others’ divinity—until alignment lets us finally see what was always there.
Jane wasn’t prepared for what she walked into.
She had driven to the funeral of Alba—the representative of one of her customer organizations—with little expectation other than to show respect. After all, Alba had recently passed, and throughout their working relationship, Jane had long felt a measure of frustration toward her.
Alba was, to Jane, unreliable. She canceled meetings often. Alba spoke in ways Jane found circuitous and unfocused. She had become one of Jane’s most challenging clients—not because of what she asked for, but because of what Jane thought she represented: disorganization, distraction, a time-consumer.
And then came the funeral.
It was held in a Black church. Jane, who is white and was raised attending traditional white congregations, immediately noticed something different. There was music, joy, laughter. There were tears too—but the tears flowed alongside testimonies and praise. The pews were filled—300 people strong. And at the front of the sanctuary, the body of Alba rested peacefully…with a crown placed gently upon her head.
It took Jane’s breath away.
This funeral wasn’t about grief. This was a coronation. A recognition of the royal life Alba lived. And Jane could feel it—viscerally, undeniably. The room pulsed with love, gratitude, reverence. Here Jane witnessed a version of Alba she had never allowed herself to see. A revelation began. And with it came a reckoning.
The Version We See Is Always Ours
Here’s the great paradox of physical reality: we never interact with “the person” we’re interacting with. Instead, we interact with our version of that person. A version filtered through our active beliefs, biases, expectations, and emotional momentum. That’s true for clients, coworkers, lovers, friends—and yes, even for funeral guests. When Jane was alive in her stories about Alba, she couldn’t see the woman who had:
- Served time in prison
- Lost her children during incarceration
- Rebuilt her life and reclaimed her family
- Founded an entire organization to help formerly incarcerated women do the same
She couldn’t see the god in Alba, the angel, the founder, the force. But the version of Alba celebrated at that funeral was undeniable. That version shattered Jane’s perceptual filter. It wasn’t that Alba had changed. It was that Jane’s vibrational relationship to her had.
The crown on Alba’s head wasn’t just a tribute. It was a mirror. A powerful, public display of what Jane hadn’t allowed herself to see in life—but could now finally acknowledge in Alba’s transition.
The Hidden Grace in Every Human
This is the real culmination of the six-part story we’ve been sharing. It hasn’t been only about Jane and Sally, or about customers and contracts—it’s been about the sacred truth behind everyone we interact with: Every person is divine: Every person is on a path.
And every person reflects back to us our own energetic state. If we meet someone in frustration, resentment, or judgment, that’s what we get. We don’t see the fullness of who they are because we’re too busy projecting who we think they are. But when the filters fall away—whether through expansion or, in this case, grief—we see something else entirely. We see Source.
This is true of Alba. It’s also true of Sally.
Because Jane couldn’t see Sally’s value, she saw waste. She saw a blank database instead of a robust content strategy. She saw misalignment instead of leadership. But all of that was Jane’s story—not Sally’s.
The same way Alba’s story was far grander than Jane’s story could contain.
When Jane called me after the funeral, she was in tears—but not of sadness. These were tears of revelation, and awe. She told me everything—how beautiful the service was, how inspired she felt. And I just listened. I felt no need to emphasize what Jane discovered. Not then.
But I will next session because this is a crucial moment for Jane.
The Sacred Reminder: Alignment First, Clarity Follows
That’s because Jane’s experience shows how powerful the Positively Focused practice is. It’s not about controlling others or highlighting their flaws as though those flaws are all they are. It’s about aligning with the broader awareness of who others are so that we can be a match to it.
When we’re aligned, our filters change. We perceive more clearly. We receive more graciously. Then we soften. We soften our view of the world and those in it. And the people become radiant reflections of the love and clarity we’ve cultivated within.
That’s what Jane touched in that church. It’s exactly why I want to solidify that in her awareness next session. And it’s exactly what Sally was offering Jane, right up to her “termination.” An opportunity to shift perspective. And that’s the fundamental beauty of what this entire six-part journey reveals.
The final gift of this story is simple, but profound: Every single human you meet wears a crown. It’s not always on their head. Sometimes it’s in their actions. Other times it’s in their perseverance. Sometimes it’s in the way they reflect back to us what we still can’t see in ourselves. But it’s always there.
And if we let the stories fall away… if we pause long enough to shift our vibration… if we open our eyes from alignment, rather than resistance… we’ll see it. And when we do, life becomes a coronation. Not just of others, but of ourselves. Because the crown we see on another’s head?
It’s our crown, too.