We humans think a dream job is one that checks our boxes.
Great pay. Interesting work in a field we choose. Lots of bennies and more.
But this is what society tells us a dream job is.
I know a real dream job is one that comes to from nonphysical, the world of dreams. It’s born of my connection to my Inner Reality. Because of that, my dream job matches who I am in the moment.
This true story shows what I mean. As I tell this story, my Inner Being will chime in. Consider it nonphysical color commentary 😀. I’ll italicize their input. Like this:
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We know Perry’s life experience is a dream experience. It is no less a dream than dreams he dreams nightly. Physical human life experience, or wake-scape, looks more real. That’s only because humans put most of their attention on it. Wake-scape springs from and renews itself from dream-scape. Wake-scape is dream-scape, materialized. It is a more tangible dream.
What humans call dreams can be as real as wake-scape. There is great benefit cultivating such awareness. Perry knows this. Finding experiential balance between waking “reality” and his Reality of Origin – his dream-scape – produces seemingly extraordinary experiences in Perry’s wake-scape. But they aren’t extraordinary. They are “facts of life”. They’re what happens when anyone prioritizes their relationship with their Inner Reality.
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In a previous post I said I would share how I got the bridging job I now enjoy. My Broader Perspective says this is the perfect job for me right now. Almost daily neat realizations spring from it.
I’ve written in previous posts about some of those. How I got this job is what this post is about.
I’m surprised how much I enjoy this job. It’s not what I would have said I wanted to do at this stage in my life. But so much changed since making my Inner Reality my top priority…
Before that, my aspirations came from Belief Constellations I created. I created these constellations listening to parents, teachers, television, and observing others’ experiences. My own life experience and interpretations of said experience also contributed. All this formed rich constellations of beliefs. Beliefs from which came my aspirations: A rewarding career. A luxury car. A nice home. Lots of money. The American Dream.
Living from my Reality of Origin is far more rewarding than what I had. Focusing on the Moment of Becoming, while holding awareness of my Experience of Origin, makes physical life experience fascinating. I’m far more thrilled than when I was a “successful professional” with all that stuff.
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Fascination is what life experience is. It becomes ho-hum when humans forget how every instant springs from what Perry calls “Belief Constellations”. You create your reality. The fascination returns when you get this, then see your creation’s emergence from thoughts you think. Once visceral, tangible, physical life experience proves this to you, more than anything you want to express that creative ability more and more. Life becomes fascinating again. As you knew it would before you decided to physically materialize.
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Here are some of the beliefs included in my past Belief Constellation(s). Maybe you identify with some of them:
Success is the American Dream
Owning expensive things indicates success
Marriage is the epitome of relationship success
Having expensive and varied life experiences are success indicators
Having lots of money indicates success
Having a great socially-stimulating lifestyle, with lots of friends and lovers is success
An executive job with a high-faluting title and fat salary means you’ve made it
None of these things are bad. I had all those things. I enjoyed aspects of them.
But my enjoyment was perverted. They weren’t essentially enjoyable. They were expedients. What made them that? How I experienced them.
You see, all that success masked an inner yearning. I was outwardly successful. I also was stuck. I felt a missing…
As you know, society, marketers and the internet says things and experiences can fill that missing. I believed them. So I sought satisfaction, meaning and self-worth in these things.
Seeking my self-worth in that, I ignored my essential essence. I gained the world and lost (my connection to) my Soul Awareness. I was outwardly happy in the sense that I knew people looked at my life and admired what I achieved.
But I had achievement backwards.
Back then achievement was what others said it was. Now achievement is simple: being happy. It’s fascinating transitioning from previous belief constellations to the current, still emerging, constellations.
Happiness now comes from my Essential Essence. Not from things. Or even other people. Living focused on my Essential Essence brings continual, always increasing happiness, and satisfaction. Everything I was looking for in all that accumulation and success-seeking.
I know everyone has a Reality of Origin. If traced far back enough, we all share one origin. If traced far back enough, it’s the same for all of us. My Reality of Origin changes all the time. Like my now and my future. The past is never stagnant.
Putting dominant focus on how my Broader Perspective sees life, while standing in the Moment of Becoming, I find great satisfaction. I know what is is becoming more like what I want. That awareness is happiness.
That’s essentially what life is for me now.
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It’s challenging for some and nearly impossible for others to believe beliefs create reality. Everything in physical life experience stems from a person’s thoughts. That reality is convincing. It’s easy for humans to get lost in it. Then create the illusion of separation between thoughts and created reality. Then think and believe consistent with that. That separate reality is “objectively real”, separate from thought.
Then they’re stuck (until they aren’t). They now think thoughts consistent with a separate, objective reality. All life experience is born of beliefs. So their life confirms for them a separate, objective reality.
There’s no reason that reality can’t change to another. All it takes is the same work humans put into creating the reality they have. Most aren’t ready to do the work. Even though it’s the source of incredible success, happiness and prosperity. They get what they’ve creatED and complain about that. Instead of creating what they want. And realizing the joy that comes with that.
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There are beliefs a lot of people share. Except maybe the wealthy.
The main one is: “I must trade my time and effort for money”.
I have this belief. I believe(d) that money only flows into my life experience when I do something to “earn it”. Well, I’m changing that belief. Still, momentum of that long-held belief pervades. It’s everywhere, isn’t it?
It’s like a powerful river current. Ever tried swimming against a strong river current? Making headway is impossible.
For four years I swam against the current of my beliefs about money and jobs. I refused to get a job. Instead, I believed money would come to me through my projects.
And while some money has come, it’s not yet where I want it. Money is coming through my projects. But my beliefs about money close the door on what would otherwise be an abundant flow.
It’s challenging for some and nearly impossible for others to believe beliefs create reality. Everything in physical life experience stems from a person’s thoughts. That reality is convincing. t’s easy for humans to lose themselves in it. Then create the illusion of separation from it. Then think and believe consistent with that. That reality is “objectively real”, separate from thought.
Then they’re stuck (until they aren’t). They now think thoughts consistent with a separate, objective reality. All life experience is born of beliefs. So their life confirms for them a separate, objective reality.
There’s no reason that reality can’t change to another. All it takes is the same work humans put into creating the reality they have. Most aren’t ready to do the work. Even though it’s the source of incredible success, happiness and prosperity. They get what they’ve creatED and complain about that. Instead of creating what they want. And realizing the joy that comes with that.
One day, this video showed up on my YouTube account. I know everything showing up in my life is on purpose. The message was clear. It makes more sense to have a job, a temporary one, while I allow new belief momentum to grow.
But I wasn’t going to get a job the normal way. That’s because I knew a better way was possible. Having is work for me requires remembering five key points.
Creation rarely happens in an instant.Creation doesn’t happen in a flash. It happens through steadily increasing momentum. The result I want is immediate in nonphysical, but, materialization takes a while. Also, physical reality contains more resistance than nonphysical. So materializations don’t happen here instantaneously. This illustration is helpful.
By the time I desire something it’s done. But its materialization depends on me receiving messages leading me to the doneness. If I’m not open, or in tune it gets delayed.
I know I’m ready when I’m consistently positively focused. That’s because my Experience of Origin and my Reality of Origin are pure positive energy. Being in tune means experiencing physical reality the same way I experience nonphysical reality: with as little resistance possible. Resistance is lowest when positively focused.
Looking for the result slows it down. This is important. Looking for the materialization puts energy on its absence. It adds resistance. Materializations happen quickest when I’m not looking for them.
Early signs of materialization feel like a thought interruption. I know when I’ve received the message when a thought happens that I’m not thinking. Meditation helps condition my mental atmosphere so it isn’t noisy. In that peaceful mind-state, such messages stand out from ordinary thought.
Aware of these five points I knew getting a job could be easy. I wanted to be the evidence of that. Of course, that’s what happened.
I was on my daily walking meditation. I wasn’t thinking about getting a job. I was thinking about my resistance about getting one. I didn’t want a job that would consume all my energy like professional jobs I’ve had. I wanted to be able to have capacity after work to work on my projects. I didn’t want to get up early to go to work and spend my mornings (my valuable creative time) working for someone else.
Then I caught myself. I realized I wasn’t positively focused. So I changed my thinking.
I thought instead about how it would feel to get a job matching everything I wanted. I dropped my criteria. Instead, I focused on how it would feel getting a satisfying job. One matching my current state.
I had no idea what kind of job that might be. Or how much it would pay. I was a blank slate. Fertile ground for my Inner Being.
The Inner Being that every human has knows everything that person wants. That’s because the moment the person decides they want something, it is real in nonpyhysical and part of one’s Inner Being. That’s the Experience of Origin.
The Inner Being thereafter, organizes pathways. Pathways that, if received by the person, will lead to the desire’s physical manifestation.
We know this is the way life works. It only looks different because of where humans put attention. The more they look at what they don’t want, or reasons why they don’t have what they want, the more of what they don’t want they get.
This is purposeful, as we said before. It eventually causes a turnaround. The person starts listening to their Inner Reality. Just as Perry is doing.
Matching my physical reality with my Inner Reality is the best way to hear impulses from my Inner Reality. So on my walk, I thought “how would my Inner Being feel about me having the perfect job?”
What came to me was: “triumphant, appreciative, jubilant and joyful”.
That was the message. It came out of the question. It wasn’t me thinking that thought. It’s hard to describe. Impulses are easier to feel than describe.
Next, I put attention on these emotions. Jubilance, appreciation, triumph and joy. I let them build. I felt better and better. Soon I felt great. Extreme positivity. How could I not? Jubilance, appreciation, triumph and joy feel great, right?
Then, after three minutes, it happened.
The name of the company appeared in my head. I knew it wasn’t me thinking that name because my thoughts were on the good-feelings. Besides, that company name wouldn’t have come into my head. I rarely think about it.
Nothing else followed. It came so suddenly, it surprised me. Then it was gone. I was thrilled. Fascinated. It happened just like my Inner Being said it would. Eager and excited, I continued my walk.
The view from where I sat by the river.
At the end of my walk, I sat alongside a river’s edge. I pulled out my phone and looked up this company. Was I surprised to see they were hiring?
Nope.
I applied on the spot. In an hour, I got a hire date contingent on next steps.
First I had to video record one-minute answers to three questions. Later that week, I had to pee in a cup. The proctor told me supposing no disqualifying indications, I would start on my start date.
And that’s what happened. In less than a week, I went from wondering about a job, to getting one. No resume prep. No searches. No interviews. Only a piss test.
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This job offers a lot more than soothing my old beliefs, enough income to cover all my basic needs and a little spending money. The shift I work allows ample morning time to meditate and work on my projects. The work itself is light on my mental capacity. That leaves lots of mental leeway to practice being positively focused. Lots of mental leeway to strengthen my connection with my Inner Being, Inner Reality and my Personal Trinity. It also brings new relationships and experiences. Relationships and experiences I share here.
Those relationships and experiences are divine rendezvous. Experiences letting me know I’m on my path.
When not working, I’m not working. I bring no work home like I did in my high-stress jobs of the past. That means even more focus time.
And, the work itself is energizing, physically rigorous and demanding. My 8-hour shift passes quick. I feel strong, light.
This job is one more proof point in a mountain of evidence. Evidence piled so high, I know nonphysical reality is real. I know everything my Inner Being told me and is telling me is playing out. I know all this manifesting business works.
Not because of what happens. Because of how I feel moment by moment.
In this way faith is unnecessary. Tangible evidence is overwhelming. Who needs faith in the face of so much evidence?
Trusting my connection with my Inner Reality is growing at an incredible rate. Proof begets trust. And a desire to know more.
I know I create my reality. I want to understand more deeply how that happens.
It’s thrilling thinking about what will happen next. I’m living the fascination my Inner Being says life can be. That’s why I write this blog. I know based on feedback I get that what I’m sharing inspires others.
And ultimately, that’s why I’m here. To inspire others not only to their dream job, but to their extraordinary life.
Things happening in my life is how I know my spirituality works.
My my life gets better and better. In every area.
Coming on the heels of the previous story, the following is further proof. Further proof how All That Is makes things happen with virtually no effort on my part.
In that previous post I wrote about what seemed like a chance meeting, but really wasn’t. That story showed how when people show up in what seems like magical ways, I know I’m doing this whole “manifesting” business right.
The more that happens, the more I want to keep it up. I’m discovering a brand new kind of life. A life where everything I want happens with no effort.
. . .
This next experience happened last month, one week after the previous post. It shows how the Universe answers my every desire. The path it creates though is never direct. It curves all over the place.
That’s because I’m always adding more to my desires. And every thing added is being organized by me to be experienced by me. That’s why I know I already have everything I want. Even though it looks like I don’t right now.
It looks that way because “right now” is the past. Not the present.
The reason it looks like I don’t have these things “right now” is, because the present has manifestED. The NOW is in a manifestING PROCESS.
The now is always a manifestING thing. In the manifestING NOW, I have all I want. It only takes a while for it to become manifestED. But when it becomes manifested, it’s the past.
I want to be in the steady, manifestING now. Not the “right now”. The fresh, the new is in the manifesting now, what I also call The Moment of Becoming (MOB).
Sometimes I get impatient about not having in the right now what it I want. I know being impatient prolongs the process. So I strive to be happy and positive with the right now, knowing it’s old news. Not news.
What’s more, it takes longer to manifest things in physical reality. In the nonphysical realm of the MOB, everything happens now. The trick is finding satisfaction with that. Rather than satisfaction on the right now, which is the manifested past.
After all, what is manifestING MUST become manifestED. That’s just how life works. Here’s why satisfaction with the MOB reality is key. When I’m satisfied there, I’m not prolonging the process. The process by which things there become real things in the “right now”.
See?
So I know it’s only a matter of time before everything I want becomes my physical reality, my right now. How do I know it’s happening? How can I believe that? Experiences like the one you’re about to read happen so much these days, I’m convinced.
Incredible Outcomes Indicate More Are On The Way
Before I share what happened, here’s some context. What happened was cool. But if you don’t have the context, you won’t understand it.
I now have a bridging job. I call it that because it bridges beliefs I’ve held a while with beliefs I’d rather be dominant.
To explain…
I have believed, like a lot of people – nearly everyone actually – that money shows up in my bank account when I do something to “earn it”.
That’s not the only way money can show up though. There are infinite ways money can show up in my bank account.
For example:
There are people who inherit money.
There are people who win lotteries.
There are people who steal money and get away with that.
There are people who find money.
There are people other people give money to for no apparent reason.
There are people who’s money comes from interest and investing.
There are others who do things today, that later, generate constant streams of money. Like building a company, or creating a film or writing a song today, that perpetually generates income through profits or royalties.
So there are a lot of people experiencing money flowing into their experience. And that flow is not tied to what they’re doing.
My beliefs about money match beliefs most of us tell. Like others, I’ve believed this so long, it has a lot of momentum. The belief that “I must do things to earn money” itself has faded into my consciousness background. Doing so it creates a belief constellation and associated reality. A reality I took for granted as some objective “truth”.
That reality can be replaced with any reality I deliberately create. And beliefs creating that reality can become my new beliefs. A new “truth” emerges. As real as my current one.
The shift can’t happen quick though.
That’s because my old beliefs have a lot of momentum. I know this because I’ve tried over the last four years to force it through action. That didn’t work. My old belief constellation has too much momentum behind it to turn it on a dime. Like the train analogy, old belief momentum must first slow down. Before new belief momentum can dominate.
So I’ve taken this bridging job as a way of slowing momentum behind my old story.
What I like about living is, I learn how to live better nearly every day. By better, I mean happier. Every day life shows me how to live in accordance with my Personal Trinity in the Moment of Becoming. The better I get at that, the better life gets.
The happier I get.
This bridging job is part of my learning. It came consistent with creating my reality. That’s another story too. One I already plan writing about.
Suffice it to say I didn’t have to do anything to get the job. It literally came to me. And, my Inner Being has told me over and over that this job is exactly where I’m supposed to be right now.
Meeting that transgender woman I wrote about last time, and the way it happened confirms this. So does what happened in this story. So much good stuff is happening, I know this job is on the path to all I want.
Ok. That’s the context.
So here I am, at my bridging job. I’m preparing to go on a route when another guy asks to ride with me. He does the same job I do. Sometimes our dispatcher pairs us.
So this guy, I’ll call him “Guy”, and I pair up. We prep my van. Then we head out.
Turns out Guy believes in the power of beliefs. He also coaches others on using clinical techniques to change reality. I didn’t know this about him. But that was a nice surprise. I have no idea how successful his approach is.
Anyway, we spend the day connecting over this and other things we have in common. We both enjoy the work we’re doing. We both enjoy practicing positivity. We both enjoy napping in parks. ☺️ We both have other things going on. Things larger than this job we enjoy. We both know life is an adventure. We both have strong spiritual practices.
Midway through the work day, Guy tells me he’s enjoying working with me. The feeling is mutual.
Guy asks me about what I do when I’m not at the job. I tell him about Copiosis and Positively Focused.
Then I tell him about The Transamorous Network. As I’m talking his eyes light up. He’s rapt while I’m telling about it.
When I finish, Guy says “Perry, I’m a trans guy.”
I knew that about him. But didn’t want to say anything. Was I surprised? Yes.
And no.
Think about this. I’m telling more and more stories about affiliating with the trans community, about wanting a person who matches my relationship desires. And here I’ve spent my entire day with a transgender person! On my job! The job my Inner Being said was perfect for me!
Not only did we spend the day together, we share many things we believe in.
This doesn’t mean Guy is one of my matches. He’s not someone I’m gonna date. I want a transgender woman after all. But he represents my unfolding path to the person I want.
I know life is not a straight line to my fulfilled desire. It’s a roundabout adventure!
I also know I’m not supposed to get everything I want all at once. That would be overwhelming. Imagine if all the transgender women I would meet in this life and the next and the next showed up right now. I’d have so much trouble just remembering all their names!
That wouldn’t be fun at all. Well…it might be at first LOL.
It’s much more fun watching my Personal Trinity put together events. Like this all-day get-together, put together in ways I couldn’t organize myself. Or like that bus experience from the last post. I know it’s all happening — Sarah from two weeks ago, “Guy” from this week, the other transgender woman I chatted with on the bus the other day, but didn’t write about, the media interviews I’m doing more of lately, and whatever else might come next. It’s all for the sheer enjoyment of the unfolding. Not for the end result!
Illustration by the author
So Guy isn’t the one. I mean he is a match in the sense he matches many of my beliefs. That’s great news. It’s great news because if Guy is this close of a match, imagine what my actual transgender woman match will be!
Guy showing up in my life is like the Universe saying “here’s evidence you’re on the right track. Congrats. Keep up the great work!”
Just as Jeannette was in the last post. Just as the trans woman I chatted with briefly on the bus the other day. It’s all evidence my beliefs are changing.
And here’s the better news: As one belief’s evidence shows up, that means, all my new beliefs are in play too. Everything happens simultaneously.
So I know my belief about money flowing into my bank account, without me having to do anything, is becoming real. I know it’s becoming real because this belief about my transgender partner is unfolding in tangible, satisfying ways.
This is how it works!
Let me be more clear: Meeting Guy, spending all day with him, enjoying the connection and having so much in common with him tells me I’m headed in the right direction. A direction where I’ll spend all day with, enjoy the connection with, and have so much in common with her. The transgender woman who matches me as much and more as Guy does.
And, all that will coincide with an event, where my bank account fills with money.
On the way to all that, I’m having fun enjoying my now.
· · ·
There’s more to the story of course.
Guy then asks if The Transamorous Network would ever expand its work. He wondered if it could help trans people become more comfortable in their skin.
The short answer is: yes.
The longer answer is of course. Until a person is comfortable in their skin, i.e. holding beliefs of self-acceptance, self love and worthiness, they can’t meet their ideal partner. Or have much else that they really, really want.
If I want a person who is confident; someone happy in themselves; a strong and capable person, a happy person, that person can only be mine if I feel that way about myself. I have to be a match to that. That’s the only way I can have that.
Of course that is what Positively Focused helps people with. We help others learn how to do what I’m doing.
After that, Guy asked me for my contact information. He said he wanted it for when he meets transgender women. He asked whether I prefer non-op, pre-op or post-op women. I think he’s thinking about matching me with someone. Why else would he ask such questions?
I know one of the ways the Universe brings my match into my life will be through people I already know. Since Guy shares many of the same things I believe in, and since he sees and knows a lot of transgender people, who knows what may come of this? That said, I know my Inner Being has far broader perspective than I have. So she can come from anywhere.
That’s not why I’m happy about having met Guy. Guy is a cool person. It’s fun to work with him. It’s cool to have him as a co worker.
And, he’s an exceptional indicator that my beliefs, my new beliefs, are shaping for me a new reality. One in which everything I want is.
Seems something significant is happening every week now. I like that pace. And I know it’s going to get better and better. Real evidence is the best evidence of spiritual validity.
The best result of being Positively Focused happens when people make the world the way I want it. Even complete strangers. When people show up in what seems like magical ways, I know I’m doing this whole “manifesting” business right.
The more it happens, the more I want to keep it up. I’m discovering a brand new kind of life. A life where everything I want happens with no effort.
I know. I write “effortlessly” and “no effort” a lot.
I wouldn’t use those words if they weren’t accurate.
What happened to me last week shows how through little effort people show up for me at the right time and the right place.
Last Monday, I went to a meeting at the local LGBTQIA community center. I’m getting closer to the community this way. This is the second or third meeting I’ve attended. This week, over half the people there were new. One of the people was a shy transgender woman just starting out in her transition.
When the meeting ended, she stood in the doorway as most people left. I stayed too. I was talking with another attendee and the meeting organizer. I got an impulse about this person in the doorway. It told me I would be speaking with her.
· · ·
I share a lot about how I follow my intuition. That’s because it is how my Broader Perspective tells me where to go what to do and who to talk with to get what I want.
Two things must happen to hear my intuition: first, I must learn to hear or feel the impulses. Second, I must learn to tell the difference between impulses and other voices in my head. Voices that aren’t intuition. Meditation helps a lot with that. So does practice or trial and error.
I think the main reason people don’t trust their intuition is because they haven’t practiced these two steps. So they think intuition is random at best. Or a trick of the mind at worst.
So here I was in this room. My impulse telling me to talk to this person. I wanted to talk with her. But I’m also engaged in another conversation. Not to worry, my intuition says, I’ll meet her again.
What happened next needs some context.
· · ·
I usually ride my bike to get places. Other times I ride the bus. Rarely do I go by car.
Riding the bus can be a place where perfect strangers help make the world my world. It’s all up to what I put my attention on. (Photo by the author)
There are 84 bus lines operating in the city where I live on any given day. Even if only two buses serve those lines each day, that’s almost two hundred buses moving around Portland. There’s also a street car and a light rail as well as many shuttles operating. Every day.
But there are more than two buses per line. Some lines have many more than four. There are literally hundreds of buses running around Portland at any given time.
Portland’s more than 84 lines serving the greater metro area.
Ok, that’s the context. Back to my story…
I had finished a great day at my bridging job. I felt high and happy. I wasn’t trying to make anything happen. I wasn’t even thinking about this transgender woman.
I got on the first bus of my 2-bus trip from work. I was listening to a podcast I enjoy. And I was thinking about how cool it was that I got two more informal offers for promotion at that job. And I’d only been there two weeks.
So I got off the first bus. I waited a few minutes until the second bus came. While waiting, I suddently started thinking about being transamorous. I thought about the places I might meet transgender people. I thought this way for about 10 minutes. Then, the image of that transgender woman from the meeting came into my head. Then the bus came.
It stopped in front of me. The doors opened and…you guessed it: there she was.
She wasn’t just on the bus. She was driving the bus!
· · ·
Those of you unclear about how matter, events, circumstances and people become life experience might say “Perry, you’re crazy. That’s just coincidence.”
But it’s not coincidence.
This is how everything happens. Evidence is overwhelming. When I connect to my Broader Perspective, I can control what comes into my life.
“Sarah” and I had a great conversation the whole way to where I live. I’m sure I’ll see her again. I encouraged her to come back to the meeting next month. But the fact that she drives the bus line I ride home on pretty much assures me I’ll see her either way.
No matter what I’m doing or where I am, I know the universe responds to my focus. The more I put attention on positive things, the more positive things happen in my life. (Photo by the author).
This is happening all the time in my life.
For example, this week on several occasions, incredible synchronicities happened between me and complete strangers. Since I spend a lot of the day at work, that’s where most is happening.
I drove up to one customer’s house, for example. I called her to let her know I was arriving. Most doing this job say the customer hardly ever picks up the phone. This customer answered immediately. When she came outside, she told me “it’s so strange. I had my phone in my hands when you called. I was looking right at it.”
How’s that for perfect timing?
In another example, I needed to deliver three packages in a secured apartment building. But I couldn’t get in because there was no intercom. At just that moment, a resident showed up. She let me in. I’m sure she wasn’t supposed to do that. 😀
Walking down the hall, I delivered one package. The next package too. The last package needed to be delivered in person. But the person wasn’t there. I walked back towards the elevator and this woman was coming out. I had an intuition this was the customer. I asked her if she lived in that one apartment. She asked why and I told her. Turns out, she was the customer!
Then I drove up to this house with a gate. I didn’t have the gate code. I couldn’t leave the package outside the gate. Someone would steal it. Just then, (I swear!) a woman drove up. It was the homeowner. We completed the transaction and my trainee said “that was good timing”.
Exactly, I thought.
There are so many things like good timing happening in my life. It’s happening in your life too. The more you pay attention to these the more happen. The less you pay attention to negative things happening, the less they happen.
I know it’s really about focus. Everything is happening all the time. Both positive and negative. The question is, what set of happenings are you paying attention to?
I know I have the option. I can see all the negative, discouraging, bad things happening in life. There are a lot of those things. Or I can turn my attention to all the positive, empowering, uplifting things happening in life. There are a lot of those things too.
I know whichever I put focus on is what I see the most. So it makes sense to me to pay attention to what I’m wanting to see and experience. And put no attention at all on what I don’t want to see.
So my life “trues up” to that. It gets better and better. For someone who doesn’t know this, life just looks random and coincidental. Life is not random or coincidental. Everyone creates their reality.
Are you missing out on the greatest adventure ever that is your life?
I enter heaven by feeling good, being happy and acknowledging when cool things happen in response. Cool things offered to me, by me, which tells me I have walked through the pearly gates. There, my Personal Trinity celebrates me. They celebrate my choices. Because my choices make All That Is more.
To me, heaven is not someplace I go when I die. After all, there is no such thing as death in the sense most people understand that word. Instead, heaven is a state of mind. It results as life shows me how much I am blessed. It results when I see and acknowledge all moments where my Personal Trinity showers me with what I want. I don’t see all those moments. I’m getting better at that though.
Never the less, when I do recognize every thing I want is coming to me, I get a wonderful feeling. That feeling tells me I’m connected to the best part of me. That larger part of me.
Connecting like that. That’s heaven. When I’m in that place, my world matches that state. So Earth for me becomes heavenly.
Today was that kind of day. I woke to satisfying, vivid adventures in my dream scape. After few moments of post-sleep focus, dream experiences feel as real as wake scape. I wake from my dreams feeling heavenly. I know that experience demonstrates my higher awareness kicked in. I know I can’t connect with that “other” reality so clearly if my awareness isn’t at a high level.
I did my usual morning routine. Then I meditated for 20 minutes. It was bliss. I found my center, something I love doing in meditation’s stillness. That amplified my already positive feelings. Through specific meditational processes, I re-enter the awareness state in which dreams occur. I know when I recall dreams this way while awake, I practice standing in that high awareness I’m in when dreaming. Only I’m not dreaming.
Being in that high awareness while awake is important. That state is the same unrestricted state which creates physical realities as delicious as dream state realities. Nightly dreams come for many reasons. One reason is through dream experiences, I learn how to hold that non-resistant state while awake.
This practice is how I become a master creator. I know the practice works because of what happens in dream scape. Re-presencing dreams in wake state tells me it’s working too. I also know it’s working because of how I feel. Finally, I know it’s working because of what happens in daily life.
Like what happened the rest of this day for example.
· · ·
So, feeling great, I got ready for an eight-hour shift at what I’m calling my “bridging job”.
My bridging job is what I’m doing while I sooth my beliefs about lack and scarcity. I’m replacing those with beliefs about plenty and abundance and possibility. And about not tying my financial abundance to action taken.
I know this is working because my days are getting better and better, week after week and month after month. How do I know they’re getting better? One, I keep a journal. Two, I see miracles – or rather what seem like miracles – happen more and more.
Only they’re not miracles. They’re not miracles because I know this is how life is supposed to be when I’m positively focused. Here are some of the things that happened the day I wrote this.
• A manager told me today that I am on a list of preferred employees at my “bridging job”. I’ve only been there two weeks. I know this indicates positive results of my focus. It also foretells more positive things experiences.
• My whole shift was fun and full of happy moments. I know these experiences should not be discounted. They are the stuff of what makes life heaven.
• When I checked in this morning, I was assigned a brand new, awesome Ram Van. It only had 48 miles on it. It had all the bells and whistles. My manager said don’t get attached to specific vans because we often trade vans once we get to our loading site. Today, she said we would switch as usual. But, when we got to the site, instead of switching vehicles, we moved our loads to the vehicles we already had. So I got to drive that van the whole shift. Awesome!
• Mid morning, I received an enormous indication. My trainee and I arrived at our first stop. We were looking for this one lobby where we would deliver a package for a customer, since he wasn’t home. My trainee found it. We were about to drive over there. It was quite a ways away. But just then, a guy parked right next to our van. He got out of his car. At that moment, as we were walking up to our van, I got an intuition our package belonged to this guy. The impulse to ask him was strong. So I asked him. He was the customer! So we gave him the package and avoided having to drive to the lobby. My trainee was stunned. “How did you know that was our customer?” he asked with a look on his face as though I had done some Jedi mind trick. I told him my intuition told me. I said I listen to my intuition all the time. I said I like writing about events just like this in my journal. When I do, I said, my intuition delivers more experiences just like this.
• Later, we had a package for a customer who didn’t leave us the code to get in the secured apartment lobby. As it happened, a FedEx delivery driver showed up at the front door just when we did. And, of course, he had the code. We all walked up together, chatting the whole way. It was a wonderful moment to share positive stories with each other!
I’ve written before that little things that happen that tell me bigger things are on the way. I know they are on the way, not only because of these little things that happen more often, but also because of how I feel. I know I want really big things. I also know my Personal Trinity is working behind the scenes creating my future now. A future now jam-packed with what I want.
And the more I do those things the clearer my dreams get. The clearer my dreams get, the more I match that clarity in my waking reality. The more I do that, the better my awareness becomes. And the more my awareness allows me to see little positive signs. Signs that my dreams, large and small, are becoming real.
As all thathappens I know I’m on the way to my biggest dreams of all.
It feels great being Positively Focused. I can’t think of any better way to live.
The Universe amazes me in small ways. These small ways are how I know that big things I want are coming. Because of that, I rest easy about life most of the time.
I’m getting better at making “resting easy” my full-time attitude. I know the better I get at that, the more I’ll see how much my personal trinity showers me with blessings.
Characteristic of my trinity is its recursivity. They’re like a fractal. Every part of my life, large or small, reflects that which makes up All That Is, the Universe and my Inner Being. As well as the processes used which make reality reality.
It’s why I know things always work out.
Illustration by the author
Case in point: one Thursday not too long ago. It was an amazing day. Full of epiphanies and one of three peak days that week. I’ll share the whole, fascinating story in a couple months. Things are still “unfolding” as they say.
Today I’ll tease you with one nugget.
When You Think, It Is.
Photo by the author
A bicycle is my primary transportation mode. Portland is bike friendly. People ride bikes year round here, even though it rains most the year. In late spring though, it’s perfect riding weather. Not too cold or hot. Not as much rain. That brings out a lot of “fair weather riders”.
Like myself.
I mean, I do ride in the rain sometimes…
Anyway, Thursday I was riding home from a couple great appointments. Downtown Portland, where the meetings were, is about six miles from where I live. I love taking this route home. It’s just long enough to get a workout, but not so long it exhausts me.
I got my bike tuned up a couple seasons ago, making a fresh tune up past due. As I rode up a hill on the way home, the gears shifted on their own, making a loud racket and causing a hitch in my bike get-along.
I thought “hmm. My bike needs a tune up.”
That’s all that happened. Something happened in physical reality. Then in my head a thought occurred.
I’ve noticed something while getting better at creating reality. If I ever-so-briefly hold an idea of what I want, then let it go, that thing I want happens fast. Usually within the day.
If I stew about what I want, if I keep thinking about it, it usually takes much longer to happen. Strange, isn’t it?
I think that happens because, in the first case, I don’t put attention on the absence of what I want. I don’t have time to think about it. The thought comes. Then goes.
So it’s a pure request. Unhindered by negative thought. I’m told that if a request is pure, it is answered immediately. Resistance is inherent to physical reality. So I don’t expect instant manifestation. Same-day manifestation is pretty quick though.
Illustration by the author
Bigger things I want, such as a huge amount of money, are taking longer only because my old beliefs slow things down. But I’m getting better about letting those beliefs subside. I’m also getting better at replacing them with ones more consistent with what I want.
Old beliefs like “I have to work a job to get money” I’m replacing with “money naturally happens in my life”. Beliefs like “it’s impossible to just have money show up like magic” I’m replacing with “everything is possible”.
How do I know this process works? Because more things are happening like what I’m sharing.
So on Thursday, when I thought about needing a bike tune up, the thought came. I thought it. Then let it go. I didn’t think about how much tune ups cost. I didn’t think about the hassle of scheduling one. I didn’t think about being without my primary (and most enjoyable) transportation.
Three quarters of a mile down the road something happened. I’m among a group of riders. We’re all heading from downtown. It’s after five. Bicycle commuters are overflowing the bike lane. It’s a normal late Portland Spring day.
Except, it’s not normal.
Three quarters of a mile past that hill where my gears puttered, there’s a guy on the road’s shoulder. He has a bike stand – one of those things you clip a bike to that suspends bikes in the air so you can work on them. He’s in shorts, t-shirt and blue latex gloves. At his ankles is a sign. It reads something like “Get bike advice”.
I ride past him.
In the 12 + years I’ve taken this route home, never have I seen this guy. Yet, here he is. On this day. Passing him, I get an intuition to turn back. It’s a strong one.
My Inner Being has written in this blog about “intuitions” and “impulses”. They say these are communications from them. Urgings which, if followed, lead me towards what I’m wanting. So many times over the years, following their urgings resulted in surprising and delightful encounters. Encounters with people. Encounters with circumstances and events which, like they promise, end with me getting what I want.
So when I rode past Dan (his real name), my intuition pinged. Hard. I couldn’t resist turning back.
Of course, I’m not always great at following my intuitive impulses. Sometimes I miss them. Sometimes I hear them, then don’t follow them. Lately, my Inner Being has been urging me about getting better at immediately following these impulses.
Given ambitions I have, I know they’re helping me get better at this. They know doing so will get me what I want even faster than it happens today. Which already is pretty fast. This story is a great example. In fact, the whole week overflowed with poignant results. Results you just can’t make up!
Photo by the author
About half a mile past Dan, I decided to turn back. When I returned, I asked Dan if he would be willing to tune my gears up. And if so, how much he’d charge me.
“Yes I can tune them,” he said. “I’ll also show you how to do it. And, I’m not wanting any money. I’m doing this to help riders. That’s all.”
That’s all? Wow, I thought. That’s AWESOME.
When he said that, I knew this was the Universe responding to my “request”. After the week I was having. After the day I was having, how could it not be?
Only after hearing Dan say this did I realize a couple things. One, I was willing to pay a bike shop like $100 to get my bike tuned up. Two, I also thought about looking on YouTube to learn how to do it myself. My Inner Being knew all this, and here they delivered an “in-person YouTube” lesson!
And you know what? Tuning up bike gears is easy!
Dan showed me how to do it. It took a minute or less. I shook my head. To think I was willing to pay someone almost $100 for a minute’s work when the Universe organized it at no cost!
My ride home after that felt like floating on a cloud. I was on a natural high.
· · ·
It’s these demonstrations which tell me I’m connected to my personal warehouse of blessings. That and how I feel on the daily. I’m feeling happier and happier the more I maintain positive focus. My Inner Being tells me there’s no upper limit how happy I can get. I think that’s so cool.
The more happy I get, the more my personal trinity, in small and large ways, shows me that life is easy. It shows me I can relax in my blessedness.
It’s these small events, happening more and more these days, which tell me my bigger desires are on their way too.
For me, manifestation is great. But manifestations are the spice which make the main event tasty. The main event, where I put most of my attention these days, is how great I feel. I feel great knowing the Universe not only has my back, it’s got my entire life in its hands.
I enjoy seeing little things happening in my life. These little jewels along my journey are how I know big things are happening too.
Big things like seeing my creations appreciated by many. Or getting notes from people saying my expression benefits them.
I know a happy life comprises many happy-life moments. But happy moments don’t make me happy. I get happy first. Then happy moments happen.
Yesterday a little thing happened. It would have amazed me had not so many of these kinds of things happened before. Instead, it confirmed what I already know: I’m on my path. Life is a joyride. I create my reality. And these kinds of things happen all the time.
I’m sharing this because sharing is part of how I appreciate what I know.
· · ·
I had a wonderful brunch with a long-time friend and his partner. It’s timely because I am appreciating more these days my own queerness as a trans-attracted person. It wasn’t missed on me that all this embracing who I am is happening right around Pride Month.
Nor is it surprising that my life is changing in big ways. These changes too prove appreciation creates an awesome life. An awesome life on every level. Life tunes up to one’s heightened positivity. The more optimistic I get, the greater my life gets.
After a wonderful time with Kyle and “Josh”, I hopped on my bike. I headed to a secluded spot along Portland’s Willamette River. According to their schedule, Navy ships visiting Portland would be leaving in the hour. This secluded spot would be perfect to see them.
An hour passed. No ships.
But what did happen was way more satisfying.
A section of the winding, bumpy downhill road. Where it all happened. (Photo by the author)
On my way to the riverside, I rode down this very steep, very bumpy road. It runs about a mile from the University of Portland down to the river’s edge. I can’t over stress how unmaintained it is. Ruts, potholes separated asphalt, weeds and dirt make that downhill run challenging.
It also rattles the hell out of me and my bike.
I usually ride with ear buds, listening to a podcast or music. This day was no different. two-thirds down the hill, my bike started making a huge racket. So loud I heard it over the podcast.
I got to the bottom of the hill. Then checked my bike. Turns out a fender fastener fell off. The two free parts rattled together as the fender vibrated with every bump.
I had trouble with this before. I tightened it “finger tight” back then. “Finger tight” was not enough apparently.
Ugh! What’s That Noise?
Noises bug me. Whether a squeaky dashboard on a car, or an annoying rattle on my bike, I’d prefer they not happen. So when this racket started, I got annoyed.
But only for a sliver of a split second!
Instead of complaining about the noise, dreading havinglost that fastener or worrying that I wouldn’t find it, I stayed neutral. No negativity! That’s my moment-by-moment mantra these days.
An hour later, when I had enough fun at the river, I hopped on my bike. Funny thing was, I had so much fun on the river, I forgot about the missing fastener until just then.
Instead of riding back with that annoying rattle, I found a piece of string on the beach. I used it to “MacGyver” the two metal pieces, so they wouldn’t rattle. I figured I’d ride to the bike shop. They’d probably have a replacement.
Check out those MacGyver skills!
But then my Inner Being offered a different approach: why not meet with the piece that fell off?
My first thought was “forget it. It’s lost. I’ll never find it on that bumpy road. It could have tumbled off the road into the weeds. I was going so fast.”
Jeez. Reading that, I sound like Luke Skywalker in Star Wars:
[Luke sees his X-wing is about to sink into the bog]
Luke: Oh, no! We’ll never get it out now!
Yoda: So certain, are you? Always with you, what cannot be done. Hear you nothing that I say?
Luke: Master, moving stones around is one thing, but this is… totally different!
Yoda: No! No different! Only different in your mind. You must unlearn what you have learned.
Luke: All right, I’ll give it a try.
Yoda: No! Try not. Do… or do not. There is no try. [Luke tries to use the Force to levitate his X-Wing out of the bog, but fails in his attempt.]
Luke: I can’t. It’s too big.
Yoda: Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. Its energy surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes. Even between the land and the ship.
Luke: You want the impossible. [sees Yoda use the Force to levitate the X-wing out of the bog and gets flustered when he does it] I don’t… I don’t believe it!
Yoda: That is why you fail.
So for a split second i entertained disbelief. But I caught those thoughts early. I replaced them with more positive thoughts: “I’ll find it.” “This might be an adventure!” “What if I find it?” And “My Inner Being and intuition will lead me to it.”
That’s all I thought. Thinking those thoughts I felt optimistic.
I got on my bike and rode up that steep, bumpy road. I didn’t try to find the fastener. I just rode slowly, enjoying the climb.
That’s when I started weaving back and forth up the road. I didn’t do it on purpose. I was having fun. The fastener was not in my mind.
Then, I happened to look to the right and down…
And there it was!
See it?
Think of this! I careened down that steep, bumpy, road. It was a mile long. That tiny fastener could have fallen anywhere. In a pothole, a shaded spot, in a rut, into the weeds alongside the road.
It’s right there…..
It was a literal metaphorical needle in a mile-long haystack.
Yet, here it was. And I rode right to it.
How cool is that?
There it is!
Life Is Full Of Happy Events When You’re Happy
I didn’t share this earlier, but there was another big co-inciding about that brunch. I’ll share it now.
I know I am a “lightworker”. I came here to uplift humankind during this time of huge change. That’s why I have these creative abilities. I want my creative expression to serve that purpose. I know as it does, I will become more successful.
Several weeks ago, I was day dreaming. Day dreaming is a great way to visualize what I want. So long as I don’t energize the absence of what I want.
The lifestyle I’m visioning includes having a private chef as part of my household staff.
I know that getting what I want is inevitable. On the way to all that, my personal trinity gets involved. It sends me little co-inciding events letting me know what I want is becoming my reality.
My “Personal Trinity”: All That Is, my Inner Being and the Universe. All working together coordinating my emerging reality.
Remember that breakfast with Kyle and his partner?
Well his partner is an executive chef. He loves cooking. And, not long ago, he was the personal chef to the billionaire wife of a major motion picture company! Motion pictures. How’s that for success through creativity?
Now picture this: here I was sitting across the table from the personal chef of a super-successful creative person. A billionaire!
Coincidence? I say providence. Josh was so gracious. He shared his experiences as a personal chef to a billionaire, the highs and the lows of it, how it works, and what she paid him.
It was an excellent opportunity. I savored that conversation. I knew it was a breadcrumb on the way to my emerging success.
The process by which I create reality. With a lot of help from my “Personal Trinity.”
There are lots of things happening in my life showing how what I’m doing spiritually shapes my now. My future too.
The same thing is happening in your life.
I know doing my part means being happy. Being easy about my life. Appreciating as much as I can. The more I have done that over the years, the more my experience includes events like the two I’m sharing.
And there’s more coming. It’s what life is about.
Life for me is not about the big dreams materializing. Although that’s part of the path.
For me, the main event of the path is the path. Learning to recognize and appreciate the jewels along the journey.
The key to recognizing them is being positively focused as much as I can. Then watching as my Personal Trinity surprises and delights me.
We shared a day in Perry’s life where small “pearls” prove he lives on cloud nine. The less effort you put into trying to get what you want, the easier life gets.
Other people are key. The Universe coordinates other people coming into your life. People showing up are pathways to what you want. The Universe puts them there according to your instruction. When you give it clear instruction, your desires come fast. That’s how life gets easy.
Drawing by the author
Today we’re sharing more examples from Perry’s life show how easy life can be. Give clear instruction, and the Universe gives you what you want.
· · ·
Last month Perry noticed how much is going right in the world. He trends positive about most things. But that day, amazement was near constant. The world is getting better and better. Even if you think it’s not.
Feeling super-positive that morning, Perry checked his email. Two notification emails mentioned the same long time friend. Let’s call him Leon. One notification came via Facebook. The other via Patreon.
Perry gets a notification that “Leon” has become a patron
Leon follows Perry’s work with Copiosis. Turns out last night he decided to support Perry’s work. The Patreon email said Leon became a $20 monthly Patron.
Perry spent a moment enjoying that news. Then he wondered why Leon changed his mind after so long. So he contacted him.
Leon said he now gets the value and power of Perry’s positive focus. So he decided to support spreading the message.
It was interesting timing. Perry feeling amazement. Then checking his inbox. Then talking to Leon. Good news everywhere.
Leon shared his new-found perspective and understanding. Meanwhile, Perry dashed off a graphic illustrating his perspective. Life gets better and better. Even what appears negative serves life’s positive long game.
Perry’s graphic showing life’s pendulum.
Perry’s friend agreed, then wrote this:
Perry thought that was a great idea. If someone could show tangibly, or “prove” what Perry knew is the case, it could help others “see the light” too.
Perry knows of course. For him, it’s not something he “thinks”. Nor is it something he “believes”. There’s a difference between “thinking”, “believing” and “knowing”.
When you “think” something, you’re supposing. It’s not knowing. You’re not sure.
When you “believe” something, you think you “know”. But there’s a difference between the two. Believe something long enough and you can know it. That’s because beliefs create reality (for the person who believes).
But knowing is distinct. It’s visceral awareness confirmed through personal life experience.
You’re Getting Everything You Want
Ever notice when you want something, yet don’t spend a lot of time or energy trying to make it happen, it happens faster?
You probably don’t notice. You’re not paying attention. So you miss how fast it comes.
It’s a lot like time. When you’re bored, you notice how slowly time passes. You watch the clock. Time seems like it runs backwards.
When you’re engaged and excited, time passes fast. You don’t notice it. When you notice time, like when you’re bored, it passes slow.
Now try this: look at your clock. Watch the clock until the minute changes. Notice how long it takes a minute to pass. Felt like a long time, yes? They say a watched pot never boils…
The same is true with what you want. The more you notice it’s not there, the longer it takes to come.
That’s because when you want something, you notice it’s missing. You think you focus on wanting that thing. But you can’t help notice the opposisite. What you want is not there.
Don’t pay much attention to the thing you want. It will come faster. That’s what happens now in your life. You don’t notice this though because it happens so quick. And because you aren’t noticing it.
In these cases, you notice something you want. Then forget about it. The larger part of you creates it instantly in your moment of becoming. Then it organizes events and people so you can have it in your “reality”.
Because you’re not paying too much attention you make room for the organizing. Then, voila! It shows up.
This happens a lot. So often you don’t notice.
For things you really want, though, it rarely happens this way. It can. But doesn’t.
The reason is obvious. You’re slowing things down. Now that you know what you know, you can fix it. It just takes practice.
· · ·
So here was Perry having this conversation. He agreed with Leon how cool it would be if someone objectively proved the world gets better. But Perry didn’t need this evidence. He knew already. So he didn’t care as much.
It would be nice though if someone did that work. Wrote a book perhaps…
That’s as far as Perry took it. Leon said he has a brother who has a Math PhD. He said he’d ask his brother if he’d look into it. Perry thought this was cool too, but didn’t think too much about that either.
After the conversation, Perry got ready for his dentist appointment. The conversation ended in time for him to get dressed, floss and brush his teeth and walk to the dentist about a mile away.
He arrived ten minutes before his appointment. It was a pleasant walk, in warm sunny weather. Everyone in the office was happy. At least everyone Perry talked with.
Usually, Perry gets his teeth cleaned by Sabrina, his hygienist. At the end of the appointment, the dentist does the exam. This time the dentist was busy with a difficult patient. Perry heard him talking with the patient in the other room. They were talking through an interpreter. The case sounded really difficult.
Sabrina the hygenist all up in Perry’s grill. (Photo by the author)
Next thing Perry knew, the dentist was there examining his teeth. The hygienist hadn’t finished. Perry asked the dentist what was up.
“I came in to see you now because I’ve got this difficult case over there,” the dentist said. “If I didn’t come do your exam now, it probably would be a while.”
This happens frequently. It’s like Perry’s the center of the universe. Little things remind him. Like a dentist’s Inner Being telling him to examine Perry’s teeth rather than making Perry wait.
Your life works this way too. The more you’re positively focused, the more evidence shows up that life is this way. Or rather, the more you can see that life happens this way. Because it is this way. You just can’t see it.
· · ·
After Perry’s appointment he walked home, teeth shiny and clean. At home an article caught his interest. It was about Andrew Yang, a democratic presidential candidate Perry follows. Two things happened at that point.
Several weeks ago, another friend introduced Perry to people belonging to this thing called the Intellectual Dark Web (IDW). Several of these people’s stories didn’t make sense. They seemed to be progressives, but progressives hated them.
He didn’t understand this. But wanted to. He also didn’t want to spend a lot of time trying to figure it out. So he didn’t.
On this day, though, he came across this article on Yang. It contained a link to another article. That article was about people in the IDW. The link answered all Perry’s questions. It even introduced Perry to a website created about these intellectual renegades.
Perry remembered a few weeks back thinking “I’d like to know more about what IDW is.” But didn’t pursue the answer. And an article about IDW fell into his lap.
Notice the pattern. Perry having a positively focused day. Then a friend becoming a $20/mo. patron. Then a great conversation with that guy. Then a flawless dental appointment, followed by a wonderful walk home. Then an answer to a question he asked a week before. We’re showing you how to give the Universe your instructions.
· · ·
The next day, Perry was talking with someone who responded to a story he published on Medium. There, Perry shared the same pendulum graphic he shared with his friend on Facebook. The commenter wrote back, suggesting a book from the author Steven Pinker.
Perry never heard of this book or the author. When he read it, it amazed him.
Remember Perry’s friend, Leon, said it would be a good idea if someone proved what Perry knows? That’s what Steven Pinker did in his book! It describes exactly what Leon wanted to know.
Of course, Perry told Leon.
Now it should be mentioned a LOT of people disagree with this book’s thesis. We do too. So does Perry. Reality is SUBJECTIVE. You make it what it is. That “what is” is “for your eyes only”, which is a really great James Bond film…
The point is, the planet and reality are both “big”. Big and sophisticated enough to hold all perspectives.
Which is why Perry needs no objective evidence for his knowing.
Still, were all these events, which happened in the course of a few days, coincidence?
We know the answer is “no”. So does Perry. Perry knows when you’re positively focused, life is this way. It’s this way for people who aren’t positively focused too. But they don’t see it.
They don’t see it because what they’re getting is consistent with their life-view. See the world as negative, the world is that way. If you think things can’t change, they don’t.
Life gets better for everyone. Even negative people. But not nearly as fast as it could.
In every life instant, amazing experiences are happening. A dizzying number.
Even in your life, these things are happening. You don’t recognize them if your awareness is limited by negative thinking. But the more positively focused you become, the better you see.
“Yeah, right,” you might scoff. “My life is busy. I don’t have time to stop and smell the roses. Get your head out of the clouds.”
Having your head in the clouds is the prerequisite to living life on cloud nine. Why do you think humans have the saying “living on cloud nine” in the first place? Or having one’s “head in the clouds”?
It’s not because it’s a fantasy. For some it’s real.
But that’s how life is supposed to feel for everyone. Not only a few.
On cloud nine, you live in bliss, you see evidence everywhere that your dreams are becoming real.
Not “becoming real” metaphorically like a dream. But in real life.
Out of life’s beautiful complexity, you meant to choose life experiences matching your dreams. You knew your life could match your dreams before you got here.
That’s why you’re here now.
As more dreams came true your life would feel unreal. More dreams would come true. Then more. Then more. And then you’d happily leave physical reality behind.
By “life” we don’t mean this life only. We mean all your lives. Lives you’re living in many dimensions. So many it makes no sense counting them.
You only live once…or do you?
But you’re human. As human, you narrow your larger awareness into this one human experience. It seems like you have only one life to live. You Only Live Once (YOLO), they say.
But they are wrong. You’re eternal. And you can know that as sure as you know you are reading this.
Many reading this would like what they’re reading to be true. They have trouble finding evidence of this in their lives though. They have no proof these words are accurate.
If you’re one of these readers, take heart. The only reason you don’t have evidence is your awareness is limited by beliefs you have. You can’t see the evidence because you don’t believe it’s there.
But evidence surrounds you. A quick story to illustrate.
Evidence Appearing Invisible Only Is When You Can’t See It
One day, after a week away on vacation, Perry’s wife Bridget came home, unpacked and checked in on her pet rabbit. She didn’t want to burden Perry with taking care of the rabbit while on vacation. She already had him taking care of the cats. So she had a friend do it.
During her vacation, she still worried about the rabbit. A lot. Bridget worries about a lot a lot.
At first, she didn’t know Perry was feeding and watering the rabbit. Even though her friend and Perry himself told her that.
Not long after she returned from her trip, even though only two hours had passed since Perry told her that he had been feeding the rabbit, Bridget, in a panic, sent this:
Now, here is the interesting thing. In the picture above, you see an empty food bowl. It could have been empty because the rabbit ate all the food. Either way, you don’t see the entire picture. This is how you might see your own life.
Below is a larger perspective of the entire rabbit cage. Notice the full food bowl on the left. It seems obvious Bridget should have seen the full bowl. The whole picture.
Logical right? Why didn’t she?
Because her beliefs prevented her from seeing it. That’s why. She said she worried her whole vacation about the rabbit. That worry created a reality where – for Bridget – the rabbit hadn’t been fed. Even though in Perry’s reality, the rabbit had been fed.
The point is, just because you can’t see evidence of something doesn’t mean it’s not there. It is. It only means you must learn how to see it. “Learning” usually means expanding your awareness beyond your beliefs. The best way to do that is by living with your head in the clouds. Or better said: living Positively Focused.
This is what we talk about through this blog. Positively Focused is more than a clever title. It’s the state of being required to see the evidence. Evidence of what?
Evidence you live a charmed life. That you live on cloud nine.
When you get Positively Focused, your vision gets clearer and clearer. Not only do you see plenty evidence. That evidence piles up so high life gets amazing.
Your larger awareness deluges you with cloud nine evidence. That includes lovers, material success, life satisfaction and fulfillment. If you’re not getting what you want, it’s because of where you believe. Just like Bridget couldn’t see a reality different from her beliefs.
Some will say disparagingly “this sounds like the movie The Secret”. Many think that movie was too material oriented. Some think it bullshit.
It left out a lot.
Your life experience isn’t about collecting a bunch of stuff. It’s about realizing you’re eternal. It’s about realizing your absolute control over your life experience. It’s about knowing, you create your reality. How do you know? Through experiencing yourself creating your reality.
Then it’s about taking that knowledge and creating your best life. Day by day, as you go along.
Material Pursuits Are The Spiritual Practice
Since “life” happens in physical matter, “things” can help you realize you create your life. This is why The Secret focused so much on “things”. Things and experiences are “the stuff of life”. “Physical” life is as “real” as “spiritual” life (i.e. nonphysical) gets. Because physical life experience is spiritual experience taken to its maximum experiential extent.
Physical life is the ultimate expression of spiritual life. At least it is to humans.
You knew that when you decided to become human. The ecstatic, profound immersion experience you have on Earth keeps you coming back.
Perry’s life demonstrates this truth to him all the time. His awareness is getting bigger. So he sees more evidence than most. Sometimes it’s little pearls. These are everyday experiences where life goes wonderfully.
Material pursuits are a spiritual practice (Photo: Zoe Holling)
And there are great big platinum/level experiences. Realizations that astound him. Perry knows both little pearls and platinum level experiences are the stuff of life. Both are equal in validity. None greater than the other.
The more he comes into his knowing, the more profound Perry’s pearls. And the bigger the Platinum-level realizations get.
That’s why Perry’s knowing is solid. His conviction too. Every realization, every manifestation that happens is one more brick in a gargantuan wall of evidence.
Sure, he still doubts sometimes. But those moments are rarer than ever.
You can know too. It just takes a little practice.
Perry writing now: it’s true. I once wanted to believe this stuff. But now, so much of what my Inner Being has told me has happened, it’s impossible not to know.
· · ·
Today, we want to share what happened one morning this past week. (the week we are writing this which is the week of March 24-29, 2019, even though it might not be published for a while)
We want to show you the small stuff, little clues Perry received. Remember, these are happening in such plenitude, it’s impossible to share them all. Perry would be writing nearly every moment about every moment!
We tell these stories to inspire readers. Not so you can copy what’s happening in Perry’s life. But so you can create your own snowflake. Your own unique, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious life experience consistent with what you believe would knock your socks off.
In other words, your own cloud nine.
Anything you want can be yours and is yours. You only must apply yourself so you become positively focused. Then you have it.
A Morning In Perry’s Charmed Life
On Sunday, Perry decided he wanted to get some camping utensils. He promised Bridget he’d also run to Trader Joes (TJs). Perry planned to go straight to TJs first. That would have been the logical order. Grocery shop before TJs got crowded. The other stops were closer to home.
But he got inspired to get the utensils first. Dick’s Sporting Goods was less than 10 minutes away. On his way, he got another inspiration: stop by this old cemetery even closer to home.
First trip: to the cemetery instead of Dick’s
You’re following your Inner Being, larger perspective, god, or whatever you want to call it. Such guidance never looks like a straight-line destination to your goal. It’s always a roundabout trip. Many reasons explain this.
First, you’d get bored if things happened fast. In other words, you prefer the long route. Second your larger perspective is coordinating with everyone else’s. So often, a circuitous trip is necessary. That’s because, rendezvous with others must be coordinated. You get what you want, while participating others get what they want also.
So what looks like what Abraham calls a “wild goose chase” is actually purpose-designed, as you’ll soon see in Perry’s experience.
So Perry went to this Columbia Historical Cemetery. It was an interesting visit. When he arrived, he assumed he’d get inspiration for drone images or other photography. But he didn’t see anything inspiring. He stayed there maybe 15 minutes.
Then he headed to Dicks’. The utensils he wanted cost almost $20 at Dicks’. Ridiculous! Perry thought. He bought all three utensils previously for $1 each (a knife, fork and spoon) at REI.
Knowing he could get a better deal, he left. Now he could have gone to Amazon.com and get any number of sets. Some less than what he paid. The cost wasn’t the point. It was the journey that unfolded.
On his way out, he got his next inspiration: try out the outdoor store next to Dicks’. It caters mainly to conservatives. Being liberal in most respects, Perry tends to support liberal-minded stores. In this case, he didn’t second guess his intuition.
“Whatever” he said, and went in.
Despite is apprehension he received great and kindly service. He also found exactly what he was looking for, for exactly the same price he paid before, more than seven years ago. Only they were a nicer color.
So following his impulses, and not second guessing or prejudging them, gave him what he wanted. At a great price.
But that wasn’t all.
One dream Perry is allowing into his existence is owning a brand new Ford F-150 pickup truck. According to Abraham, you know you’re lined up with your desire when you see it everywhere.
Here’s an excerpt from Perry’s journal, written the day of this trip:
Then, on my way out [of the sporting goods store], my heart skipped a beat when I saw this gorgeous F-15. While I was taking these pictures (I didn’t miss this Source!) there were five other F-150s driving around me. It was pretty awesome. I get it too. I’m right on the verge of this realization. SO cool.
While Perry took pictures of this truck, five other F-150 owners drove by, at exactly the same time. A dark blue one, a silver one, two maroon ones and another white one.
The truck Perry is attracting into his life experience, spotted in the sporting goods store parking lot.
This is why your desires unfold in a roundabout way. If Perry had gone directly to the sporting goods store, the six trucks simultaneous experience wouldn’t have happened. But because he followed his intuition, he arrived in that spot with perfect timing so he could have this experience.
After that Perry went to TJs. Even though the store was crowded, he had an in-and-out experience. He had a wonderful conversation with the checker and even got a great parking spot in the TJ parking lot. If you ever shopped at TJs, you know how tight their parking lots are! Especially at peak times.
The final entire trip.
Now, these experiences might sound like coincidence. They might sound like no big deal. And they are, until they start happening to you regularly. This was one day in a week of such experiences. We’ll share more next time.
· · ·
Our point today is, you’re surrounded by evidence of the charmed life you live. Your cloud nine life. If you don’t experience a cloud nine life experience, it’s not because you aren’t having one. You just can’t see the evidence.
The same way Perry’s wife couldn’t see the full rabbit food bowl.
You can live with your head in the clouds. It’s not a fantastical dream. It is reality for everyone. Most don’t experience it because they believe it’s fantastical.
Arnold thinks you need to work your ass off. He’s wrong. (Art credit: The author)
Modern life says, if you want something you should set a vision. Next, set goals and objectives, put them on a timeline and track your progress. If you work your ass off, struggle and get lucky, you succeed.
None of that is necessary.
Many mainstream leaders, motivational speakers and successful people encourage these steps. But you can have anything you want easier than that.
And, you don’t have lose any of your ass. 😜
The easiest way to getting anything you want is by being happy.
That sounds crazy, we know.
Most mainstream leaders, motivational speakers and successful people didn’t become successful by being happy.
They can only tell you how they did it. Theirs is the hard way.
Yet, nearly everyone tries finding success that way. Rather than trying a different, better way. Their way works. But it’s no fun. And success isn’t guaranteed.
Happiness brings success 100 percent of the time. You don’t need luck. You needn’t work hard.
You only need to know three things:
Why feeling happy works
How to use happiness and,
What the purpose of happiness is.
“There’s a purpose to happiness?”
You bet.
Ask someone next to you what is the purpose of happiness. Likely they won’t have a good answer. They will say happiness is an emotion. They may say it doesn’t have a purpose. Or that happiness makes you feel good. Some will say they don’t know.
Some even steer you away from happiness.
Almost 135,000 claps. A lot of people don’t know what purpose happiness serves. (Photo: Medium.com)
Yet your emotional capacity is purposeful. Powerful too. Your emotional capacity is the most powerful tool you have.
Once you understand its purpose, if you make being happy your number one priority, everything you want comes quickly, easily, and in great numbers.
Some people poo-poo happiness because they don’t understand its power. We’ll explain how and why happiness is so powerful later. We’ll even show you how to use happiness to get anything you want.
But first, check out how Perry realized several dreams at once, just by being happy.
How Perry Gets What He Wants Without Goal Setting, Working Hard Or Losing His Ass
Perry fell in love with sailing three summers ago. It started with a class he took on an impulse. He loved his first time on a sail boat. The sails grabbed the wind. The wind pushed the boat over on its side as it increased speed. Invigorating!
That first experience begat a new dream. How cool would it be, he thought, exploring the world this way?
Perry had no sailing experience. Only one class. That didn’t matter though. He knew others sailing around the world today. Families, couples, even single people are doing it. Some didn’t have experience when they started either. Many taught themselves.
How hard could it be?
It’s sailing. How hard can it be? (Photo: By Bcebul – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0)
Besides, Perry thought, he has his Inner Being. It has access to all knowledge. It knows where everything Perry wants is. And it knows how to lead him to it.
Another question people can’t answer is what’s Earth’s purpose? Does it have a purpose? Or is it a random result of chance?
Earth exists on purpose. It’s here so you can come, refine your interests from Earth’s massive variety. Then live those interests to the fullest extent imaginable. Aided by your Broader Perspective, the universe and All That Is, your time on Earth can include any experience.
Perry knows this. So when his first sailing class finished that summer, sailing around the world became something he wanted. But he set no goals or timelines. Instead, he knew being happy would bring him what he wanted.
· · ·
Perry joined the sailing club that hosted his class. That gave him a year to practice sailing using the club’s boats. But he couldn’t sail them alone. He didn’t have enough experience.
He needed a sailing partner. It so happened he met a guy in class who also fell in love with sailing. His name was Jarrett.
Jarrett aboard a training sailboat. (Photo by the author)
When you’re happy, not only do you not have to set intentions and goals, but all resources you need literally come to you. Including people.
These people’s Broader Perspectives put them on your path because your path lines up with theirs. Your Broader Perspective and their Broader Perspective coordinate events, matching people and resources. Such nonphysical communication happens all the time. That’s how events become events.
Including events comprising your life. So long as you don’t muck up the process, your life experience is a wonderful joyride. Being happy is how you keep from mucking up the process.
· · ·
Jarrett and Perry became friends. But Jarrett didn’t have money for a club membership.
No problem, Perry thought. Jarrett could be my guest. Here’s a video Perry took with Jarrett on a club boat cruising on the beautiful Columbia River.
For the next year, Perry and Jarrett’s friendship deepened. Turns out, Jarrett shares Perry’s life convictions. He too believes people create their reality and that life is meant to be fun. Jarrett works as a contract sound engineer. Like Perry, his time is his. He doesn’t have to be at a job every day. So he has a lot of free time.
Note the combination of people and events here: Jarrett’s time flexibility afforded by his occupation; Jarrett and Perry’s mutual beliefs; Both men taking the same class, at the same time. These illustrate how thoroughly your Broader Perspective organizes events on your behalf leaving out no detail.
How hard do you think it would have been for Perry organize this on his own? Finding someone who likes to sail, who has the time to spend sailing, who can pay for the class and believes the same thing he does? That would be no small feat.
But it’s a cinch for your Broader Perspective.
This is why people who don’t understand happiness believe they must struggle, work hard and set goals. That’s what you must do when you don’t know about your Broader Perspective. You’re on your own. On your own, you don’t have the resources nor the connections. That’s why you need luck and hard work.
Comparison Contains The Seeds Of Unhappiness.
One day, three months later, Jarrett arrived with news. Out of the blue, his uncle, a successful orthopedic surgeon, gave him a sailboat. A San Juan 7.7. Jarrett’s uncle bought the boat more than 20 years ago. He never sailed it. It sat in a barn all that time.
Jarrett was excited. He didn’t know his uncle had a boat. Let alone a sail boat. Knowing what he knows, Jarrett knew this was his Broader Perspective at work. With no effort, Jarrett, who had never sailed in his life, now owned his own sail boat!
Now, Perry could have been excited too. But he wasn’t.
Outwardly he was happy for Jarrett. But inside, he was jealous.
Jarrett went on and on about his boat. About how it was equipped. Modifications his uncle added. Modifications he wanted to do. He was so excited.
Perry wasn’t excited.
He was thinking about how it must be to be white. How it must be to have a successful family. He wanted to be happy for his friend. But the more Jarrett talked about this damn boat, the less fun Perry was having. Even though it was a perfect day for sailing.
Perry was mucking up the process! How? By comparing his life to Jarrett’s!
Comparing your life with another’s is never a good idea (Photo: Feliperizo-co-heart-made on Unsplash)
When you compare your life to someone you perceive has it better than you, unhappiness happens. Good news is, turning comparison’s unhappiness into happiness is easy. If you catch it early, that is.
So comparison can be beneficial. Feelings comparison conjures can serve as alerts. Like alerts, they can jolt you from habitual, indeliberate thinking.
Perry felt awful thinking about Jarrett’s “white privilege”. White privilege, while real, is not something you want to think about if you’re not white. Thinking about someone’s white privilege when you’re not white guarantees unhappiness.
Even if you are white, thinking about your white privilege can cause unhappiness. That’s why most white people don’t think about it!
Perry knew this of course. What he didn’t know was everything was working out perfectly for him, and for Jarrett. There were plenty pleasant surprises ahead.
But first, things were going to get “worse”.
Jarrett onboard Achilles I at dry dock. (Photo by the author)
The world around you is your subjective life experience. Your life experience comprises a stream of one accretion event after another.
These events look like random compositions of people, circumstances, objects and experiences strung together in a certain timing. Your string of accretion events over time is your life.
Events, circumstances, people and objects in your life aren’t random. These planned events seem random. But they’re not. Who is planning them? And how are they planned?
You plan them. You do so using two simultaneous processes. One is what you look at. The other is what you think about what you look at.
Look at happy things or think happy thoughts. You’ll feel happy. What you’re looking at and thinking about organizes future accretion events matching current ones. Your life will fill with more and more happy events, people and circumstances.
Look at unhappy things or think unhappy thoughts. You won’t feel happy. What you’re looking at and thinking about organizes future accretion events matching current ones. Your life will fill with more and more events, people and circumstances like what you observe.
So, you decide what events, people, situations and circumstances become your experience. You know which ones are coming by how you feel and what you predominately look at and think about.
That’s how you create your life. No one else is doing it. You’re here to create a joyful life, filled with experiences you want to have. But nearly everyone doesn’t live that way, do they?
Why? Because they don’t know what you now know.
Instead, they live life not knowing their feelings are important. They think feelings just come and go. They think they’re responses to what happens in the world. That’s not what they are. That’s not what they’re doing. They are part of processes that create what’s in the world.
· · ·
Emotions are navigational instruments. They help create your life. Like any instrument, they give you information. The information tells you what you’re creating.
Your emotions are navigational instruments. Like this aircraft instrument panel, emotions tell you where you are in relation to your desires: Towards them or away from them. (Photo: Kent Pilcher on Unsplash)
Sometimes your accretion event path includes what feels like negative events. Like feeling jealous because a white guy got a free boat, and you got nothin’. That may feel unpleasant. It may infuriate you. It may cause you to fight for justice.
But “unpleasant” is not encouraging you to fight for anything. It’s offering important navigational information.
Happiness works just like this altimeter. (Photo: FAA public domain)
Say you are flying an airplane one thousand feet in the air. The altimeter (pictured right), which tells you how high above the ground you are, indicates you are descending at a rate of 400 feet a minute.
That means in two minutes thirty seconds, you will crash into the ground.
That’s something you’d want to know, right? Knowing that, you’d probably do something about that. Right? Would you fight for lowering the ground or raising the sky? Of course not.
In the same way “unpleasant” is your instrument giving you actionable information. Perry knows this. He’s been practicing reading his “instrument panel”, the emotions he feels moment by moment. He understands what they mean.
Today, two and a half years after this story, he’s almost mastered acting instantly to his instruments. Experiences in this story helped Perry get where he is now.
The point is, experiences labeled “bad”, “negative”, “unfortunate”, “bad luck”, etc. are never that. They are always good. They are part of the adventure, practice opportunities.
These experiences teach how to read your instruments so you can “fly” through a life full of your best dreams, realized.
You can fly through your life with ease. No hard work or struggle. (Photo: Ayko Neil Kehl on Unsplash)
Back to Perry.
So Perry realized he was at a “you create your reality” cross roads.
On one hand, he felt opportunity. He knew he was the on the path of eventually sailing around the world. If he stayed positive, he’d have many adventures of a lifetime.
On the other hand, and at the exact same time, he felt jealous and bitter comparing his life with Jarrett’s.
But here’s the thing: this path would also culminate in many adventures of a lifetime.
Note that. Both paths leading to the same outcome. Both paths an adventure.
The only difference is the second path takes longer than the first.
Perry’s negative feelings were not because of Jarrett’s supposed White Privilege. At that moment, and many that followed, Perry “faced” both potential paths simultaneously. In that moment, the second path was more probable by the first. How could he tell? By how he felt.
In other words, Perry’s beliefs about disadvantage, “Institutional Racism”, and “White Privilege”, vied with beliefs that Perry can have anything he wants any time he is ready. He could choose any belief. At that moment, he wasn’t choosing the second.
Why? It’s simple. The first ones were more practiced, that’s all.
The more you think a thought or believe a belief, the more influence it has on future life events. The good news is, at any time a thinker or believer can change how they think or believe.
Perry’s anguish was saying: there’s a shorter path! A more fun path! It’s the happy path!
Believing you can have anything you want whenever you’re ready is empowering. Believing your life experiences are limited because of your skin color is not. Both create life experiences consistent with themselves!
Looking back Perry gets it. As we’re writing this through his fingers, he sees how beneficial that moment and the following ones were.
But like many people, most people actually, Perry didn’t make a bold, clear choice. Instead, he waffled between anguish and a measly happiness. Perry stayed in this conflicted space a long time. For months. What happened next illustrates everything you’ve read so far.
Jesus Is Right: You Reap What You Sow. But You’re Never Stuck With It.
Perry’s club membership expired. Jarrett and Perry couldn’t use the club’s boats anymore. But they weren’t worried. Jarrett told Perry once he got “Achilles I” prepped and had it in the water, they’d resume their adventure.
Imagine the mixed bag Perry felt about that!
On one hand, it was wonderful. Had Perry went with that, the next year would have been different. Instead he went with the other hand. 😜
On the other hand, Perry would get to sail, sure. But every time he set foot on “Achilles I”, he’d be reminded about….well…you know.
Then something interesting happened.
Jarrett disappeared.
He wasn’t abducted. He wasn’t murdered. Perry didn’t now what happened. For the next eight months, Perry tried to reach Jarrett. Summer came and went. So did prime sailing weather. He left Jarrett text messages, emails.
Nothing. Of course, Perry thought the worst.
He made Jarrett’s lack of communication about him and Jarrett. He thought Jarrett had used him and his membership to sharpen his sailing skills. Now that he had his own boat, he didn’t need Perry any more. 🙄 🤷🏽♂️
He imagined Jarrett sailing with his friends. His white friends. He imagined that boat being amazing and he being left out. And, as you can imagine, this thinking left him in emotional turmoil.
From Giphy
Here’s what was really going on: Perry’s negative thinking orchestrated accretion events matching the negative thinking. But only for Perry. Jarrett absent for who knows why. Perry in the dumps. No membership meant no boats. No Jarrett also meant no boat. No boat meant no sailing.
After many months, Perry finally did something about his thoughts and beliefs. Using this process he relieved himself of negative thoughts and beliefs about “White Privilege”. The more insignificant they became, the more clarity he gained.
He also gave up criticizing and feeling sorry for himself. He did journal work examining more thoughts and beliefs. In a little while he remembered everything is always working out for him. And he knew in time all this was going to turn out perfectly.
That’s exactly what happened.
One day Jarrett texted. Turns out his dad had a stroke and needed a lot of care. His family needed his help. His dad survived. But he wasn’t the same.
Jarrett and his dad sailing Achilles I. (Photo by the author)
Perry felt like a cad. Remember what we wrote about emotions! They are indicators, like an altimeter. “Feeling like a cad” is an indicator. That’s all. It was telling Perry he could feel differently about things. He only needed to think different.
· · ·
Your Broader Perspective has a bird’s eye view of your life. It knows everything you want and how to get it. It knows there are many paths to what you want.
You don’t have this perspective. You’re human. But you can access your Broader Perspective’s viewpoint. How do you know you’ve done that?
When you feel happy. Happy is the indicator.
Here’s what was great about Jarrett “disappearing”: It gave Perry time revise old disempowering beliefs. Beliefs that slow progress or lengthen the path.
Remember! You can’t live happily if you’re comparing, complaining or entertaining beliefs like “White Privilege” and “Institutional Racism”.
Yet, these things are real. But do they serve you thinking about them? Are you happy thinking about them? No one is. And if you’re not happy, you’re taking the long way. Like Perry was.
So Perry and Jarrett reconnected. Jarrett said Achilles I was at a boat yard. He invited Perry to see it. What happened next was perfect.
The Grass LOOKS Greener But It Never Really Is
Ye ol’ Achilles I on the trailer ready to move. (Photos of Achilles by Jarrett)
We did write that the boat was free, right?
Free and over 20 years old.
Achilles I wasn’t a ready-to-sail beauty. It needed a lot of work. When Perry saw it, he immediately felt better. He was also glad he was not in Jarrett’s shoes. Achilles I’s sails housed mice for 20 years. They were chewed through, pissed on and pooped on. There were holes and repairs needed in the fiberglass hull. The electronics were kaput. Even the engine needed work.
Look at all that dirt and debris! (Photo by Jarrett)
Looking from the bow of Achilles I in the barn. Note how dirty the sail is. (Photo by Jarrett)
From the cockpit looking forward. Note how much dust covered Achilles I decks. It was going to take a lot of work! (Photo by Jarrett)
Looking in the cockpit. The ropes were sitting for decades! (Photo by Jarrett)
Achilles I stern. More work than Perry would have wanted. (Photo by Jarrett)
Getting this boat for free seemed like an envy worthy event. Seeing it in person, Perry saw it much different. He had no responsibility, expense or worry about getting Achilles I ready to sail. But he still got to sail in it.
Jarrett tore apart the engine and overhauled a lot of it. (Photo by Jarrett)
Most of Achilles I’s wiring needed redoing. (Photo by Jarrett)
The front side of Achilles I’s engine taken apart for overhaul. (Photo by Jarrett)
Before…(Photo by Jarrett)
…After (Photo by Jarrett)
Revarnishing the “tiller” what the helmsman uses to steer. (Photo by Jarrett)
One day in the boat yard Perry confessed how he’d been thinking about all this. “It’s ok buddy,” Jarrett said. “I want you to sail with me. I can do the repair work. You’re the only one I know who knows how to sail!”
What a nice ending to the story. Only that wasn’t the end. It got so much better!
Your Broader Perspective Knows “How” Better Than You
Meanwhile his Broader Perspective orchestrated other events. Perry focused being positive about his sailing partner’s good fortune. He busied himself with sailing videos. He visited sailing stores, and read about yachts online. These activities inspired him. They also put him and his Broader Perspective in tune. That made what happened next.
Perry followed an impulse and called a yacht broker. Why not talk with someone who might sell him a boat one day, he thought. Upon hearing his story, the broker offered good advice.
“You might want to find someone willing to take you out on the open ocean,” He said. The broker recommended someone offering such services. But it cost over $4,000 a trip!
Perry wasn’t interested in that.
Meanwhile, Jarrett readied Achilles I. He planned to tow it to a boat ramp, get it in the water, then motor it the last mile into its new home at the local marina.
He needed crew. He called Perry.
What an adventure (in not a good way)! The boat did float. That’s about all. It had no navigation lights. No radio. Not even any sails!
Jarrett arrived at the ramp by 1 p.m. By five, Achilles I still wasn’t in the water. The problem? Hoisting the mast. Once they did that, they put Achilles I in.
Jarrett, the author and his family working on Achilles I at the boat ramp. (Photo by Jarrett’s mom)
But the battery couldn’t start the engine. Jarrett’s parents helped McGuyver the motor running just as it was getting dark. Legally, they should have had navigation lights. Jarrett figured with the motor running, they’d cover the mile before sun down.
Two thirds of the way, the motor quit. Darkness fell a long time ago. No navigation lights. No radio. No motor. No problem. They remembered a tow service emergency number stored in their phones.
Ninety minutes later, they were in the marina. The towboat captain said they were lucky they called. Even with the motor working, had they headed into the marina on their own, odds were they would have run aground.
Jarrett and Achilles I in the marina days after the night time arrival. (Photo by the author)
Did we say everything is always working out?
· · ·
A week later, Perry remembered a website talked about at class. There, people who have sail boats but no crew, and people without boats but wanting to sail could meet online. If the chemistry worked out, the yacht owner could invite the other person to sail on his yacht as crew. Perry found the site and signed up. Three weeks later, he got a call.
The guy introduced himself as Mike. He didn’t own a yacht. He did have an offer Perry couldn’t refuse. Mike told Perry he’s been on the open ocean for more than 50 years. He’s been all over the world. He told Perry he has captained nearly every kind of pleasure boat, and many commercial boats.
Captain Mike (Photo by the author)
Mike said he owned a business moving boats around the world. He was looking for people wanting open ocean experience. You don’t need any experience, he said. In fact, it’s better if you don’t. Mike said his teams moved boats owners either didn’t have time or expertise to do it themselves.
Perry asked Mike how much it would cost him.
“Nothing,” Mike said. “I pay all your expense. You just help me move the boat.”
Captain Mike looking at instruments at the helm while Curt, a crew member steers the boat. (Photo by the author)
Consider this: Perry didn’t know Mike. He didn’t know people do what Mike does. Perry didn’t know a guy like Mike lived not 20 miles from Perry. Perry didn’t know Mike was looking for crew.
When your Broader Perspective organizes events in your life, it works with other people’s Broader Perspectives. Your Broader Perspective has your best interests in mind. Other people’s Broader Perspectives have your interests in mind too. And vice versa.
So when a person shows up in your life, they agreed, through their Broader Perspective, to be there. In being there, they get what they are wanting. Even as you get what you want. Everyone in any situation gets the same thing: what they want. There are no exceptions to this.
That’s how we know everything is always working out. Life is a massive collective orchestration. It’s happening between billions of Broader Perspectives. Together they coordinate innumerable events, which become life on earth.
Mike was looking for unusual people. People interested in being on the open ocean. People who had time for that. People willing to do it for no pay. People who were passionate about it and willing to not just endure but enjoy it.
In return, Mike promised adventure. He promised his crew would learn all there is to know about the open ocean. Navigation, anchoring, safety, hazards…the works.
In other words, exactly what Perry wanted.
It was a perfect fit.
Perry’s first trip was amazing. Mike, and Perry, Jay and Curt two other volunteers, gathered at the Port of Ilwaco, Washington. Their voyage: take the “Mabel J”, a 44-foot TolleyCraft, north over 300 miles to Olympia, Washington.
“Mabel J” being inspected by the crew. (All “ Mabel J” photos by the author)
Engine oil leaks cause a plume of white smoke on startup.
This being his first trip, Perry mostly watched and took pictures. It was a pleasure cruise on a calm sea, which put an ear-to-ear grin on Perry’s face.
Every fulfilled desire contains seeds of new desires. No matter how fulfilling something is, amidst fulfillment exists desire for more. People ask “how does eternity work? Where does it come from?”
The answer is, through desire-fulfillment. New desires are born out of every fulfilled one. Life, eternal life, gets created from new desires born from within fulfilled ones.
Case in point: Perry’s first trip. It got him on the open ocean. The weather was perfect. The trip was easy, leaving lots of time for relaxation. Not more than he could handle. Just enough.
But “Mabel J” was a motor boat. Not a sail boat. The boat was old too. Engine exhaust wafted through cabins, sinking into everyone’s clothes. Everyone breathed diesel fumes the whole trip.
Straight out of the 70s baby! Mabel J’s main salon (Photo by the author)
Mabel J’s galley. (Photo by the author)
The dining area aboard Mabel J. (Photo by the author)
The double berth aboard Mabel J
The author’s ample “owner’s cabin”. It was right above the two CAT engines, so Perry got all the fumes he could handle. And then some! (Photo by the author)
Perry’s poop place. (Photo by the author)
And his hand washing station. ((Photo by the author)
As far as captains go, Mike was stoic but fair. In stressful times, though he was harsh. Everyone aboard respected Mike. After all, he alone was responsible for the owner’s boat. Boats typically costing tens if not many hundreds of thousands of dollars. As captain, his crew is his responsibility too.
So he made sure everyone knew where they stood relative to his authority.
The Captain is always right. That is, if you want to get home. (Photo by the author)
Perry didn’t like this. He prefers being his own ship’s captain. Literally and figuratively.
So here he was, getting to test himself on the open ocean. That fulfilled desire birthed more desire: Sailing his own yacht. Moving by wind, not motor. Sailing in greater luxury. Sailing on his own.
Perry’s Broader Perspective immediately realized all these desires. They would soon become Perry’s reality too. So long as Perry stayed positively focused.
So he ignored what was complaint-worthy. Instead, he put his thoughts on the voyage’s positive aspects. There were many.
For example, cruising into the Puget Sound early one morning, they had over twenty Orca sightings. That night at dinner, Perry learned people come from all over the US to see Orcas in Puget Sound. They pay hundreds to do so. But most see nothing. Not a single whale.
Perry also saw seals, sea lions and dolphin. Minke and Humpback whales too.
One of more than a dozen Orcas seen on the author’s voyage (Photo by the author)
Sea lions basking off the Washington coast. (Photo by the author)
Seattle’s skyline takes on a whole different look from the water. (Photo by the author)
Another Orca spotted in the Puget Sound. (Photo by the author)
Beautiful lighting showed up everywhere. (Photo by the author)
Top that voyage!
Broader Perspective: “Hold my beer!”
Remember, your Broader Perspective has access to infinite possibilities. Perry’s was only getting started!
Days after that trip, Mike called again. He had another assignment. Move a boat from Oxnard, California up to Puget Sound. Mike explained this was a 44-foot Mason sail boat from the mid 80s. Named “Eclipse” it’s fully equipped, ready for ocean voyages, he said. Mason 44s are well-respected and regarded open ocean sail boats. Many sailors covet them.
Mike thought it would take at least a week or two, to move her. A lot depended on the weather, which was getting worse by the day. Assignments usually diminish in winter. But the owner hoped “Eclipse” could make it north before winter storm season hit.
Mike explained the risks. He was optimistic they’d at least make it halfway. Perry was in. He was excited! In less than a month, he went from no opportunity, to nearly every opportunity.
The Perfect Ocean Adventure Opens Perry’s Eyes
The crew took Amtrak south to Oxnard.
Mike first reserved business class for himself, coach class for his crew. Perry asked if he could pay the extra $50 for business class. Business class is more comfortable. Mike said it wasn’t. Prior to departure, Mike changed his mind. To the crew’s surprise and pleasure everyone had business-class tickets. The business car was quieter and more comfortable.
Rail travel was an adventure in itself. Perry was born in California. Traveling by rail afforded many stops in towns reminiscent of home, including Davis, San Jose, San Luis Obispo and Van Nuys. They served surprisingly good food in the dining car, which Perry enjoyed. He also met and talked with many people who had great stories. There was plenty time too to relax and read and watch California’s desert scenery.
It was a literal vacation. And another desire fulfilled: Perry always wanted to travel through California by rail.
Three days later they arrived at the Marina in Oxnard late that night. They put their gear aboard “Eclipse”, then slept the first night on the boat.
The next morning, Perry explored “Eclipse” in daylight. Its blue hull shined in the California sun. Her hull contrasted nicely with its white and grey decks and golden varnished wood accents. As advertised, “Eclipse” had all kinds of equipped, including an autopilot. Autopilot meant the boat could hold its own course, making hand-steering infrequent. A nice luxury.
Eclipse from the bow. Note the beautiful hull paint, etched stripe and golden varnished wood. (Photo by the author)
Eclipse from the stern as crew member Jay fills the tanks. (Photo by the author)
Decks of Eclipse starboard side. Plenty of equipment for ocean passages. (Photo by the author)
Decks of Eclipse port side. She had more than enough equipment for the journey. (Photo by the author)
View of Eclipse’s cockpit and stern. (Photo by the author)
“How fun it’s going be!” Perry thought. Then he thought about “Mabel J”. Would this trip be better? He counted on it.
And it was.
Mike, a master weather navigator, threaded needles between storm fronts. When that wasn’t possible, they waited out storms in safe anchorages.
As we said before, every fulfilled dream contains seeds of more desire. Living aboard “Eclipse” was not the dream experience Perry imagined. Modern sail boats look like Manhattan Apartments on the inside. They’re beautiful, with their light colors, lots of windows and amenities like microwaves, TVs, washing machines and more.
Interior of a modern ocean cruiser, the CNB 66. (Photo from CNB 66 Promotional brochure. Fair use assessment on file – educational purposes)
This boat’s traditional mariner interior was no doubt beautiful…to some people. To Perry’s champagne tastes, it was worn, cramped, dark. The bathroom was filthy. It reeked of old piss. At anchor, the boat rocked constantly. Its water and fuel tanks sloshed so loud, it was hard to sleep. Sleeping aboard was uncomfortable. Far more uncomfortable than sleeping aboard “Mabel J”. Especially with four other people on a boat really built to accommodate three max. Had Perry not been exhausted each night, sleeping would have been impossible.
The dark, nearly window-less, dank interior of a mid-1980s blue ocean sailboat. (Photo by the author)
Worse, still, Perry got seasick. A lot. The sea was rough most the way. While admiring the view, or standing at the helm, he was fine. The moment he focused on a task – raising a sail, coiling a rope, even taking off his rain gear below – he got sea sick.
Then one night, mid way through, Mike made a calculation error. Winds were stronger than expected. Ocean swells were higher than expected too. Then it got dark. Twenty-five knot winds blew “Eclipse” in circles despite the crew’s best efforts to keep her on course.
A sail jammed. Motoring now, all hands kept watch. Making matters more hairy, crab season started the same week. Commercial fishermen laid hundreds of crab pots along their course. Darkness made seeing their floating buoys near-impossible. Running over one put the pot’s line inline with the boat’s propeller. If the prop got jammed with rope…
Perry didn’t want to think about that.
Usually, Mike stayed below, monitoring charts and catching shut-eye in case an emergency commanded his attention. Not tonight. Over the next three hours, Mike, who is probably near 80, stood at the front of the cockpit, peering through a tiny night vision scope yelling commands to Perry at the helm.
“Turn right!”
“Hard right now! now! now!”
“Left, left, left, now!!!”
“ Nooooo…RIGHT!”
As we’re writing this through Perry’s fingers, he’s smiling. It was something to smile about…after it was over. That night though, no one was laughing. Especially Mike.
Finally, Mike had enough of Perry’s novice steering skills. He called Oneonta to replace him. After a few moments though she was relieved. Jay, the senior crew member, took over. But even he had trouble. Mike was beyond stressed. But Jay, having three trips with Mike under his belt, took it in stride.
It was a harrowing experience right until they pulled into safe harbor around 2 a.m. The physical and psychological strain took its toll on everyone. Especially Mike. Once tied to the dock, he collapsed against the cabin, clearly wiped out.
So was everyone else. Next morning, Mike decreed there’d be no more sailing through the night.
· · ·
The weather picture up north cut the trip short. They left “Eclipse” in Crescent City, California. Perry was glad to be on land again after five days at sea and 10 days away from home. He was exhausted. He never wanted to see “Eclipse” again.
On their six-hour drive back to Portland, he remembered what Jay suggested that dangerous night.
“I think you might want to rethink being on the open ocean,” Jay said.
Sound advice, Perry thought.
Perry got what he wanted. He also learned something. Maybe, he thought, he isn’t fit for the open ocean. That lesson cost him nothing. He had a (mostly) great time.
More important, he saved a lot of money. He prepared to spend millions on his dream yacht.
Did this mean the end of his sailing adventure?
Nope. Every fulfilled desire sows seeds of more desires.
Before leaving “Eclipse” Perry talked with Mike about his seasickness. Mike said most people get over seasickness. Mike said doctors don’t really know very much about why seasickness happens. In his 50 years on the world’s oceans, with dozens of different people, Mike thinks it’s caused by stress. Not ocean conditions.
On Perry’s first open ocean trip, he didn’t get seasick. The second where there was far more stress and danger. Seasick a-plenty.
Who knows? Maybe Mike is right.
· · ·
Months later, Perry thought about that conversation. He thought about how stressful it was crewing for Mike. He thought about how uncomfortable it felt being out of his element. On the open ocean for the second time, first time on a sail boat. He wondered how much being on a boat owned by someone else made it more stressful. He thought how serving under an authority added more stress. He thought about that harrowing night. That alone was stressful!
The more he thought about this, the more he realized this adventure might not be over. He needed more experience. Under different, less stressful conditions. Like Hawaii maybe. 😀🏝
You never reach the end of anything. Life is eternal. Its eternity springs from your desires. Everyone has endless desires. Today Perry attends to his companies, following impulses from his Broader Perspective. His main goal in life is being happy. He knows what happiness means. Being happy lets him know his path will consistently yield happy experiences.
Everything you do in the end is about being happy. People usually do things they think will “make them happy”. Perry figured out life works best the other way around. Being happy first IS being happy. From there you can’t help having experiences matched to that.
We wrote a great piece about how to use happiness the way it’s intended. It’s easy. It results come in seconds. (HT – Abraham-Hicks)
You now know what modern life, motivational speakers and “successful people” don’t. You don’t have to set an intention, make goals and objectives, put them on a timeline, track your progress, and then work your ass off.
You can keep your ass and be successful. Just be happy first. Then watch what happens.
Trusting your intuition promises an extraordinary life.
That’s because your intuition knows how to lead you effortlessly to everything you’re wanting. When your intuition delivers what you’re wanting, everyone else gets what they’re wanting too.
In this post, we’re going to describe how to develop trust in your intuition, so you too can get everything you want. And be extraordinarily happy in the process. We’ll do that by telling the true story of how Perry got an open relationship in his marriage. Even though his wife didn’t want one. At first.
Perry got this (and a happy marriage) by trusting his intuition. Not by sneaking around, or trying to have a direct conversation with his wife about what he wanted.
Everything you’re wanting, everyone else wants too. Because when you get what you want, so does everyone else. That is, if you let your intuition give it to you, instead of trying to do it yourself.
Trust: It’s Built On Proof Of Trustworthiness
Someone we respected at the time had smart words about whether a person is worthy of your trust.
“Trust is consistent performance over time,” they said. Meaning, a person’s behavior over time demonstrates their trustworthiness. Not their say-so or their promises.
Same is true with your intuition. If you let it, your intuition will prove its trustworthiness over time. As your trust increases, your intuition’s demonstrations grow more dependable and noteworthy.
Before long, you’re living an extraordinary life.
Having trust is crucial. Trust comes from proof your intuition is trustworthy.
Having trust is crucial. Whether you trust it or not, your intuition is accurate 100 percent of the time. That means whatever you’re wanting, your intuition knows how you can have it. And it can lead you to it.
Making your dreams happen without your intuition’s help is hard. And no fun. It takes longer and you sacrifice more. When making dreams happen you miss out on wonderful synchronicities. Synchronicities allowing you to get what you want while allowing others what they want.
That’s the delightful path. The other path makes you bitter, frustrated and defensive about any success you’ve eeked out.
Learning to trust is a never-ending, always evolving and a “getting better all the time” process. The more you trust your intuition, the more consistent evidence you receive. Before long, results you produce are obvious and consistent. It becomes difficult to remember a time when you didn’t trust it.
When you are wishy-washy about how your intuition works, you get wishy-washy results. Let’s say you think or believe intuition is at best random and or at worst some kind of force acting against you. In that case, you’re going to get results consistent with those beliefs.
Science and other well-meaning perspectives at best caution following intuiton. Harvard Business Review, for example, puts it plain: Don’t Trust Your Gut. “Intuition is a fickle and undependable guide—it is as likely to lead to disaster as to success.” the article cautions. On the other hand, the World Economic Forum (WEF) suggests it’s more complicated than that. WEF says intuition can be trusted, but works better when balanced with understanding how it works.
The problem is, both organizations, and science in general, say intuition is a brain mechanism. In defining it that way, they have missed the mark. Intuition comes from beyond the brain. By calming brain activity, through meditation for example, one discovers a deeper source of knowledge and awareness, one that can be trusted: One’s broader perspective.
Broader perspective is intuition. It is reliable, but you have to learn how to hear it. And, it functions in a particular way. Through it you create reality. If you believe your intuition is a random voice in your head, it will give you guidance consistent with that.
Intuition fulfills what you believe.
(Photo: Rohan Makhecha)
So how do you develop trust in your intuition? Become sensitive enough to tell the difference between it and not it. Then follow its guidance. Generally, you become sensitive by testing.
But here’s the thing: you can’t test and be invested in the outcome. Especially if your investment is contrary to what you’re wanting.
· · ·
Let’s say you want a million dollars, but you don’t believe you can get a million dollars. Your intuition is going to lead you to what you believe: not getting the money.
So start with things you don’t have an investment in. Start with something simple. Something you believe you can have. A choice parking spot or meeting a friend “coincidentally” for example. These are light, fun outcomes to start with.
Unless you think those things are “just coincidence”. If that’s you, you have to start with a different test. Something not tainted by your I-already-know-this awareness.
Your intuition delivers. Every time. But it only delivers what you believe. (Photo: Nick Karvounis)
No matter what you use to test your intuition, early on, some outcomes will always be “false”. But even “false” outcomes are teaching moments. So they’re actually “true”. It’s important you understand this.
For example, you might treat the process too seriously. Making it a serious process creates too much resistance. Your intuition is sending you spot-on guidance. But you can’t receive it because, in your seriousness, you’re blocking the receiving. How that works is explainable but would make this already long piece longer. Just know one reason for a “false” outcome could be you’re being too serious about the results.
Being too serious leads to confusing results. Especially if you aren’t aware of what’s happening. You’ll get results. But they will be “false”. So you’ll think the process isn’t working. But these results show the process working. They’re trying tell you: you’re doing something that’s blocking getting what you want.
“False” results also allow you to see old beliefs that are contrary to what you want. “Intuition is BS” or “Is this coincidence?”, or “I can’t do this” are examples of such beliefs. Recognizing these thoughts and beliefs are part of the trust-development path. How can you do something about them, if you’re unaware of them?
So every result you get is “positive”. It leads you to the result you’re wanting, or, it’s highlights something preventing results you want. Can you see how “false” results would then be “true” even though they are “false”?
Recapping: trusting intuition requires knowing what you want. It requires knowing what you want is possible and being light about its arrival. Knowing “false” results are actually, not “false” is also crucial.
Letting Intuition Do The Work
Perry’s life stories show how he gets what he wants by following his intuition. We’ve recently shared stories of his wife doing the same.
We’ll continue sharing these stories because we know real life stories are better than theory. But your real life experience is an even better teacher. It’s easy to dismiss Perry’s experiences as coincidence. Or as a cool thing that happened to him. It’s another thing when it happens to you.
Photo: The Roaming Platypus
Even so, here’s how Perry’s trust in his intuition got him what he wanted. With little effort on his part.
This isn’t a process to get what you’re wanting at the expense of another person. No one on the planet is being “used” by another. It doesn’t work that way.
How it does work is, while you get what you’re wanting, others get what they’re wanting too. The world (and the All That Is) is large enough to give everyone what they’re wanting at the same time. Even if what you’re wanting is something another doesn’t.
Perry and Bridget have been together for five years now. Perry didn’t marry Bridget for the reasons most people do. He knew his path lies in being free to explore all relationships which come his way. We know, this doesn’t sit well for many people in today’s society. Especially in the US. Old erroneous beliefs about human life still shape many cultures. Questions of “ethics” “morality” and “propriety” dictate people’s perspective.
Perry knows one relationship can’t meet everything a person is wanting. Society’s encouragement of “death do us part” isn’t about a wholesome vow of love and commitment. It’s about insecure people trying to control other people’s behavior. So they feel less insecure. But that’s another story.
So we understand if you disagree with the “open marriage” part of this story. Think about it as “something someone wants, but is afraid to get it. If they did, someone dear to them would be angry if they got it”, ok?
Perry married his wife because he knew it was the best thing for his wife at the time. He knew giving that to his wife required putting some things on hold. He also knew exploring relationship alongside Bridget would bring “more” to him. Bridget would benefit too.
But when they tied the knot, they agreed their vows would not be “until death do us part”. Instead, their vows ended with “for now”. Meaning “let’s see how this goes day by day, with no real long-term commitment about anything.”
At first, Bridget wasn’t too excited about that.
Throughout these five years, many people have come into Perry’s life experience. Not all those potential relationships had to do with sex or intimacy. Many did though.
Perry didn’t act on these opportunities. He was too focused on his relationship, his projects and spiritual growth.
Bridget too was learning a lot too. She had a lot of disempowering beliefs. Beliefs that were operating under her conscious awareness. They were shaping her behavior and dictating her life experiences. Many of these beliefs did not make Bridget an ideal partner. A lot of them she inherited from her relatives and past relationships.
These realizations weren’t always eye-opening, positive and wonderful experiences. Many surfaced in ugly, angry fights. Fights over small things. Which became big things when these little things triggered her old beliefs.
Photo: Jason Wong
One day a new guy friend asked Perry about his marriage. He couldn’t understand how Perry could be transamorous and yet married to a woman who isn’t transgender. A lot of people don’t understand this.
Perry described his marriage, including the “for now” clause. He also shared his desire for an “open” kind of relationship. For now, he said, he was working with Bridget in a mutually beneficial relationship. One where Bridget’s desire for monogamy, born out of her personal insecurities, took priority.
His friend said “you should introduce Bridget to someone she might want to be with. That would allow her to open up to you doing the same.”
It was logical advice. But it felt like manipulation to Perry. And he was right. It’s what anyone who doesn’t trust their intuition would do: try to control circumstances to get what they want. Including living a double-life behind their partner’s back.
Perry is not like that. Instead, he let his intuition do the work. Not was it better than being sneaky or conniving, it was more fun. What happened over the next two years proved that.
· · ·
For reasons too many to go into, Bridget has been an insecure person most of her life. She learned to manage that insecurity by controlling other people and circumstances. Control to an extreme degree. Knowing this, Perry couldn’t have a rational, productive conversation about an open marriage. He brought it up a couple of times. But even in counseling it sparked a firestorm.
So, instead of talking about it, Perry acted as if he already had one.
Now hold up. It’s not what you think.
He thought about what it would be like having an open relationship. He even explained to others that he was in one. But he never behaved in a way contrary to his commitment to his wife.
He would, for example, tell people how free it was to be in an open relationship. He would add, that neither he nor Bridget actually acted on the freedom. They didn’t need to, he said. Just knowing that was available freed both of them from the pressure of monogamy. In being free, he said, they didn’t have to act.
Being free was the key.
In other words, Perry thought and related to others as if he already had what he wanted. He didn’t act on it. Even when he had opportunity to. Why? He was too busy with his life, his projects, his spiritual path. So there was no inconsistency between his behavior and his marriage in terms of intimate behavior. Just in his words and thoughts (beliefs).
That’s when interesting things started happening.
Providence aka Intuition, All That Is and the Universe Step In
Bridget already had at least one friend who was in a polyamorous relationship. But more people started showing up in her life in them too. Her new friend Claire was in a relationship with a guy who was unwilling to be monogamous. Claire struggled with the idea. And with insecurities she felt around her partner being with other women. She talked a lot about it with Bridget. In time, Claire started seeing other guys, as she became more comfortable with it. She actually started enjoying it!
Of course, all this she shared with Bridget as girlfriends are wont to do.
Then Bridget’s best friend started talking about being in an open relationship. We’ll call her Nancy.
Perry and Nancy had a private conversation about all this one day. Nancy knew Perry was producing remarkable results in his life. Including changes in his relationship with Bridget. Changes that were causing Bridget to change too, which Nancy noticed and appreciated.
So she wanted some advice.
Nancy is married. Like a lot of marriages, Nancy’s marriage is touch and go. Sometimes when one of the two wants to touch, the other wants to go! Neither Nancy or her husband thought they were getting what they wanted. Like Bridget, both were insecure. Their marriage reflected all that insecurity. It was not satisfying for either party.
After talking with Perry, Nancy began her own positively focused lifestyle. This changed her. With the changes, her husband became more insecure. Long story short, Nancy and her husband eventually opened their marriage. Turned out her husband already was seeing someone else.
Today, they’re still sorting out the details. Both are dating other people. Nancy dates a few men, finding great satisfaction and empowerment in that.
Witnessing her friends’ experiences effected Bridget’s insecurities and fears. As friends shared their enjoyment, her fears and insecurities started going away.
Meanwhile, Perry reconnected with an old flame, who is transgender. This person agreed to do a photo shoot with Perry. There was nothing inappropriate going on between Perry and this person. But the energy between them was obvious.
Perry told Bridget about this person, including showing Bridget a picture of her. Bridget said she was beautiful. There was not an ounce of insecurity in her voice or demeanor.
Perry noticed this. But said nothing about it.
In the past, Bridget would have given Perry the third degree about the photo shoot meeting. She’d joke (not so jokingly) about his “date”. Or she would tease him (with a tinge of sarcasm) about his “new girlfriend” he would be “spending the day with.” But this time, she was easy about his plans.
No sarcasm. No jokes.
Was Perry surprised by these changes? Nope. He knew his broader perspective was orchestrating events not only in Bridget’s life. But also the lives of her friends’ and their relationships. Everyone was getting what they want. Including Perry.
Life will surprise and delight you. If you let it. (Photo: Andre Guerra)
Four months later, Perry scheduled a meeting with this transgender person about another photo shoot. Bridget knew about the meeting.
The day of the meeting, as Perry was getting ready to go, Bridget walked up to him.
“Have a great time,” she said. She meant it too. “Feel free to do whatever pleases you dear. I love you.”
What she meant was, Perry was free to have an intimate experience with his friend, if that’s what he wanted to do. In other words, Perry and Bridget had just walked into an open relationship.
Of course, Perry felt this coming. He saw the signs leading up to it. Bridget’s friend, her neighbor, her best friend’s experiences eased Bridget’s concerns. So Perry didn’t have to have some tense, uncomfortable conversation. Instead, he found himself one day in exactly what he wanted with a loving and supportive partner to boot.
Since then, Bridget has made extraordinary progress in her own positively focused lifestyle. She’s turning into a different person than who Perry first met. Perry has too. So has Nancy. Bridget has even explored with her own dalliance. With Perry’s blessings.
When you learn to trust and follow your intuition, not only does your life benefit. So do the lives of those around you. You get what you want, with little effort on your part. All this is available when you are positively focused.
How To Let Your Intuition Convince You
Perry has been doing this positively focused lifestyle for a while. Starting to learn to trust your intuition? Don’t start with opening your relationship.
Start with small things.
Before Perry’s story we were talking about “false” outcomes being as important as “true” results. Both offer valuable insights. What insights do “true” results offer? Clues showing you how intuition works so you can trust it.
Let’s say you’re using your intuition to guide you to a parking spot. You lightly set your intention. When you get where you’re going, you envision an open parking spot near your destination will be waiting.
Then you get ready to go. You’re positively focused, paying attention to all the great things about your life. Maybe you’ve practiced this process for several weeks. So you’re in a really good mood, and have been for a while.
So when you arrive, not only is there a parking spot. You have “rock star” parking: the parking space right in front of the store. Elation!
It works!
What proof! You recognize the co-incidence of your intent and the realization of it.
Or…
You arrive and you don’t get a space. It’s crowded and it takes you a while to park.
Either way, what happens next is important.
You want to note what happened. You also want to note how you felt through the process. Get your journal ready and answer these questions:
How was I feeling right before I acted? Positive? Ornery? Frustrated? Calm?
Did I feel anything about my intention? Optimistic? Eager? Positive? Or doubtful, worried, silly, embarrassed or disbelieving?
Did I get any kind of confirmation that I would fulfill this intention? Was there a shiver in the spine or goosebumps at any point along the way?
How was the “intensity” of the confirmation (if one was received)? Was it light and passing? Or was it a feeling that wouldn’t end? Did it (the intensity) remain steady? Or did it increase over time?
If I did receive confirmation, was there a difference in how it felt? For example, was it more a feeling and less of “words in my head” or vice versa?
Where was the feeling? Was it “high” in my head? Or was it “deep” in my head? Or was it in my stomach? Or was it all over?
With these questions, you can start pinpointing what the process feels like along the way. With practice, you learn the language your intuition speaks.
What if you’re experiencing negative emotion like frustration?
Frustration, disbelief, or any other negative emotions are positive. They tell you there are beliefs you hold working against you. If you didn’t feel them, how would you know you had such beliefs?
So negative emotions aren’t what people think they are. In every case, they are helpful. They tell you whether you’re 100 percent on track with your intention. Or not.
So when you feel a negative emotion, you want to examine your beliefs. There will be a thought in your head expressing the belief. “This is all bullshit” is a thought telling you you have a belief that goes “this doesn’t work” or “I don’t believe this”. It sometimes is accompanied by anger, indignation, feeling critical, impatient, belligerent, or judgmental.
Embarrassment or shame is something a person might feel when trying something for the first time. Embarrassment shows you believe other people’s opinions about what you’re doing are more important than getting what you want.
When you identify the belief, write it down.
Then use this process to soothe that belief over time. Your beliefs determine what you get. So negative emotion is a gift: it points to beliefs preventing you from getting what you want. Remember, intuition leads you to what you believe. Not what you want.
Let’s say you didn’t get the parking spot, and you don’t have a negative feeling. The “false” result offers insight to other potential sticking points. One may be something you’re doing (or not doing) that the “false” outcome is pointing to.
As we said before, you might be too invested in the outcome. You might be putting forth too much effort (action). Or, you might not have refined your intuitional listening.
For example, in a particular exercise Perry is doing these days, he gets four choices. Only one of them is “true”. The exercise helps refine his intuitional listening. Here’s a picture of the exercise platform with one of his test outcomes.
Sometimes, during this game, he will feel two communications offering two different choices simultaneously. Sometimes both are “true”. One being “true” now…the next being “true” in the next trial. Here intuition is sending answers to two different trials.* It feels like mixed messages. But it’s actually two messages delivered at the same time.
Your intuition operates outside of time and space. It’s sending you information all the time. Your job is learn to cull what you’re wanting from the constant information stream.
Humans are used to linear time. Learning to trust intuition means unlearning one’s familiarity with that. And the idea that everything happens in a single file, one-moment-after-another process.
“False” outcomes also help ease your focuse on results, causing you to enjoy the journey more. The outcome is not the goal: the connection to your inner knowing is. That’s the goal. Not the outcome.
(We needed to repeat that because it’s really, really important).
Relaxing into the journey is the goal. Not the outcome.
The cool thing is, when you’re focused on the real goal, the happy side effects (“true” results) come easily. And delightfully.
Like Perry’s open relationship.
Get good at hearing your intuition. Master focusing on the connection between you and you, which is the “true” result you’re wanting. Then more and more evidence, i.e. “true” outcomes, will pile up.
One day you’ll realize you are trusting your intuition. Because evidence in your life experience is so plentiful you can’t help but trust. Then you’re on your way.
*You can download and play this game yourself here.
Bonus content:
This is Perry. I’ve received A ton of amazing insight since my Inner Being and I wrote this post, over a year ago. Continue this journey with me. Read my newest post, published yesterday,which offers a great follow up.
Perry got what he wanted. He also learned something. Maybe, he thought, he isn’t fit for the open ocean. That lesson cost him nothing. He had a (mostly) great time.
