
TL;DR: The author shares how a client’s emotional spiral after a brief romantic encounter revealed limiting beliefs. Through the Positively Focused process, he transformed the moment into a stepping stone toward true relationship alignment.
The Universe never makes mistakes. And yet, when things don’t go the way we think they should—especially in love—it’s easy to believe it did. That’s what happened to Dale, a dear client of mine, in an encounter that was as divinely orchestrated as any I’ve seen. Only he couldn’t see it. Not at first.
It started innocently enough. Dale was running errands at Walmart with his ex-wife, Athena. They had just come back from a gig and gone into the store separately. As Dale strolled through one of the aisles, he noticed a woman. Something about her shirt caught his attention—it had a Wiccan vibe, something Dale had explored in his past. They struck up a conversation. And just like that, a spark ignited. Not fireworks, but something even more powerful: resonance.
This wasn’t the kind of attraction born of physical lust or surface chatter. Dale and this woman began talking about life philosophies, spiritual perspectives, the big stuff. She even complimented Athena, not knowing the relationship. That felt meaningful to Dale. And then she asked for his number. Later that evening, she followed up with a text: “Do you like sushi?” And another: “How about Lady Gaga?”
Dale responded honestly. Sushi wasn’t his thing, and as for Lady Gaga, he didn’t think about her much—although he had appreciated her acting once. Still, the topics rubbed him the wrong way. He’d hoped their conversation would stay in that soulful, philosophical space. To him, these light questions felt like a departure, even a regression.
And then it happened.
Every manifestation carries contrast
A few days later, Dale ran into her again—this time at Safeway. He lit up at the coincidence, but her energy was different. Guarded. She told him she was working and quickly disengaged.
That was it.
That moment—the turn—triggered Dale hard. He plummeted into intense negative momentum. All-or-nothing thinking kicked in. “This is why I can’t trust people.” “This is why relationships don’t work.” “Why did she even ask for my number?” The mental spiral was swift and brutal.
And this is where the real value of the session began.
What Dale couldn’t yet see was that this was no failed encounter. This was a perfect co-creation, lovingly engineered by the Universe to show him something essential. He had, in fact, manifested precisely what he’d been asking for—a spontaneous connection with someone who met him at a high vibrational level. He’d been high-vibing on the subject of relationships for some time, and this woman appeared right on cue. It was a sign that his signal was working.
But every manifestation carries contrast. That’s how we grow.
This woman, without intending to, revealed Dale’s unresolved momentum around women, courtesy, rejection, and unspoken expectations. His judgments—about her makeup, her food choices, her pop culture interests—weren’t really about her. They were mirrors, reflecting beliefs he still carried: that people owe him politeness, that being ghosted is betrayal, that women who express themselves a certain way are immature or unworthy.
These beliefs had to come to the surface. Not to punish him, but to be soothed.

Tell a better-feeling story
Because here’s the truth: you cannot attract the relationship you want until you become a match to it. The Universe will keep sending stepping stones—beautiful, complex, sometimes painful interactions—that shine light on your inner vibration. If you meet these moments with curiosity, you’ll elevate. If you double down on your negative stories, you’ll stall.
And Dale stalled hard.
He went into a kind of emotional lockdown. “Maybe I’m not cut out for relationships,” he said at one point. “Maybe I should just stop trying.”
He wasn’t joking. The pain had twisted his thinking so tightly that one uncomfortable rendezvous made him question everything. But that, too, was perfect. Because it made the negative beliefs undeniable. And once something is seen clearly, it can be soothed.
I gently helped him unpack it. I reminded him: the Universe doesn’t respond to what’s “true”—it responds to belief. Every experience you have is confirmation, not contradiction. That’s why it’s so important to notice your judgments and soothe them—not suppress them, but transmute them. You do that by telling a better-feeling story.
In Dale’s case, the better-feeling story went something like this:
“Wow. Look at that! I manifested a woman out of nowhere who shared my values—at least at first glance—and asked for my number. She followed up. That was confirmation that my signal is active. Then, in the next phase, she brought up things that rubbed me the wrong way… but even that was helpful. She helped me see what beliefs I still carry that aren’t a match to the relationship I ultimately want. She wasn’t a mistake—she was a message.”
Attract by becoming
From that frame, Dale could start to feel empowered again. Not because she “should’ve” behaved differently, but because she behaved exactly as she needed to—so he could calibrate his vibration.
She was doing the same thing Dale was doing: looking for resonance. And when she sensed it wasn’t a match, she gracefully backed away. She was choosing herself. That wasn’t ghosting. That was clarity.
This is the power of contrast when met with consciousness. This is the beauty of vibrational refinement. You don’t attract what you want by demanding it from others. You attract it by becoming it. And you become it by soothing the parts of you that aren’t aligned.
The next time someone triggers us, let’s ask: “What is this showing me about me?” The answer might sting at first, but it’s the key to becoming a match to what we want. Dale’s encounter wasn’t a failure. It was a perfect stepping stone. And now he’s closer than ever.
Because the real relationship he’s cultivating… is with himself.
























