Answer: Yes. And that’s a good thing. That’s because everything surrounding you reflects what and who you are. So anything you do, including what you do for yourself, or what you do for others, expresses a selfish focus.
Since life is 100 percent subjective, your subjective experience is all you can experience. Even if you think you’re experiencing something someone else experienced, you still experience your version of that. Walking in another’s shoes then, can never happen. You can only walk in yours.
Even when you’re focusing on someone else, you’re focusing on yourself. I describe other people in my life as emanations of my own conscious awareness. Those emanations help me better focus on that which I’m creating in life. Same goes for everything else in my reality. Everything reflects back to me my internal condition.
Create happy people
When I realized this perspective, life got real easy. It got easier caring for others too. Essentially, I stopped caring for others. That doesn’t mean I became callous, it means I realized I can’t do anything to make another happy. And the closer the other person was to me, the less effective I was at making them happy. Just ask my ex-wife!
Oh, someone can make another temporarily happy. Just look at a child and its mother. Eventually, the mother will get unhappy about that kid! Neither mothers, fathers, sons, daughters nor me or you can create lasting happiness for another. It’s better then letting go of that goal. Instead, I care for my own happiness.
When I do that I find I meet more people who have found their own happiness. Which means I don’t have to care for them. They’re caring for themselves.
I’m not suggesting you realize all this intellectually. An intellectual understanding helps. But when my experience proved how accurate all this was, my “understanding” deepened immensely.
Self care means creating a satisfying life. That’s the Charmed Life I always write about. I show people how to create their Charmed Life. That first happens within the individual. Then that internal condition gets reflected externally, including in people one meets.
So the Charmed Life starts with cultivating an internal happiness. Then any kind of life one wants becomes possible. It will unfold gradually, as all things do. But it will happen. And when it does, every moment becomes a happy one.
The more selfish I am, the more joy I bring to other people. It’s uncanny, unbelievable perhaps, but true. That’s because the more selfish I am in living my life, the more I empower others to be that way too. And the more selfish people are, the better their lives get.
Everyone creates their reality. There are no exceptions to this. It’s why I assert with my clients that “reality” is 100 percent subjective. If it weren’t, none of what I offer my clients would hold as accurate. And life experience would be perilous indeed.
No one can create for us. No one can come into our experience and do something we don’t invite. Such statements present precarious situations for some. People in “victim mode” will argue for their self-imposed limitations, saying such statements are irresponsible. Similar people feeling equally insecure, but from a different perspective, claim such statements “blame victims”.
But there are no victims. Well, there are victims. But perpetrators and victims are one in the same. That’s because everyone creates their experiences. That is the one rule for which no exceptions exist.
We stand alone in our created realities
While some stridently disagree, others will (rightly) find tremendous freedom and empowerment in such statements. For if every person creates their reality, then each person can enjoy any kind of reality they want. The only limitations on such enjoyment are those each person creates for themselves.
Think of it. No one stands between where we are and what we want. Our experiences stream from our awareness just as automatically as our legs move when we decide we want to walk from one place to another. The mechanism of walking is exactly the same as reality creation. So it makes sense then to understand how “walking” happens, what’s involved and how to leverage that process more deliberately.
Once that happens, one discovers the fantastic nature of reality: that we each stand in our separate, but overlapping, created realities. We’re sovereign in our existence. And in our sovereignty, great joy awaits.
Great joy: that’s what I offer my clients.
Abraham asserting that which I know is the case for all reality.
Little by little, life improves
Now, the great thing about physical reality is, nothing happens instantly. What we have happened gradually. It came into existence as an unending stream of manifestations. So too will that which we want. To get what we want, we must know it won’t happen at once. Like our life as it is, the new life will come gradually.
The uninitiated don’t understand this. So they wobble in their focus. Then they get wobbly results. Or more of the life they already have. But the initiated learn to hold fast on what they desire. They don’t wobble in their focus. As a result, their life gradually resembles or reflects, everything they want.
Getting there should happen effortlessly. But because most of us forget this life way, we’ve cultivated habits running counter to that effortless life; that Charmed Life I write about constantly. Showing clients how to soothe such habits forms the primary steps of my client work.
The power of selfish living
But no one needs me to discover joyful living. All one need do is adopt new habits and hold them over time. New habits aligned with outcomes people want. Abraham recently offered guidance on this in an email:
It sounds easy. But for many, it’s not. That’s why people like me exist. I offer support for folks. Through a client relationship, I see things about people they can’t see. I use that insight in service, gradually pointing out, then offering alternatives to disempowering ways of being.
In time, everyone gets that for which they came. Some get more than expected, to their great delight and wonder. I especially enjoy working with those clients. That’s because their delight and wonder amplifies my version of those feelings.
And that’s why I do what I do. My purpose is selfish. In serving others in this way, I serve myself. I amplify my own focus and practice, further cultivating beneficial habits. Habits which get reflected back to me in my own created reality.
As a result, I enjoy the Charmed Life. So in sharing my Charmed Life experience, I get more of that. While also helping others develop their version of what I enjoy.
Is there really a better life than that? I don’t think so.
Sometimes getting what I want sucks. It sucks because the result – getting what I want – shows me something I didn’t realize. That can suck. But it also, in every case, confirms what I show my clients. It also proves from my own life the power of what I share with them.
Such results also remind me I create my reality by what I focus on. Not what I want. That’s a huge distinction. Many people think this manifestation business happens by focusing on what we want. And while that is true, usually what’s happening is we focus on something other than what we want. Then we get that. And then we say “this manifesting business doesn’t work”.
My recent client leaving demonstrates this with supreme perfection. I wrote about his departure last week. In that post I shared how he chose a life of struggle and hard work as though those things were badges of honor.
However, such a life isn’t a badge of honor. Well, it is to other humans. But I’m not here to please others. You aren’t either.
We’re here to live our lives as the Gods we are. We’re here to create unique lives consistent with that which thrills us. And, frankly, I don’t know anyone thrilled about living lives of struggle, sacrifice and pain born of working hard. Especially when such paths usually offer scant glimmers of possible success. Instead, such paths usually end in mediocre lives.
Lives lived as the gods we are lead to fun, joy and freedom. The path of struggle, hard work and sacrifice CAN lead there. But often, it doesn’t. (My artwork)
We’re all free to choose
It bears repeating. The honorable life is one lived consistent with what and who we are as Gods in human form. That’s why the masses and society in general idolize those who “walk to the beat of their own drum”, who are authentic pioneers creating something brand new or earth shattering. Rarely do such people follow society’s general life prescription.
Living that way, as powerful creators we all are, means casting off bogus beliefs so we live lives wherein everything we want happens effortlessly. Our life can include all manner of great things, where all our needs are met, just the way it happens for animals and plants in nature. I described this in my previous post.
But so many choose struggle instead. I show people how to live lives of joy. Not struggle. So my clients’ lives become the Charmed Life I write about. Not every client ultimately chooses that though. And I must be ok with their choice.
This client chose society’s general life prescription. Their choosing reminded me how powerful I am.
The power of belief
I saw tremendous potential in this client. Like other advanced practice clients, he quickly grasped the fundamentals. As a result, our conversations often included profound insights and realizations about how great life is. We also reveled over experiences he created up to that point. Experiences proving undoubtedly that the practice works. Some such manifestations which he created he originally thought impossible. Each of those thrilled both him and me.
Yet, I also saw in him a potential for “darkness”. By darkness I mean a tendency, a strong potential, that others’ bogus beliefs would sweep him up and carry him away from his emerging Charmed Life.
I likened him to Anakin Skywalker, father of the famous Star Wars Jedi, Luke Skywalker. Anakin became the Star Wars villain Darth Vader after giving into the Dark Side of the Force. Anakin’s mentor, Obi Wan Kenobi saw great potential in Anakin. But what Obi Wan and his fellow Jedi Masters also saw was potential for the Dark Side. In the same way, I saw great potential in my client. And a chance he wouldn’t fulfill that potential.
A wax sculpture at the Madame Tussauds Star Wars exhibit in London depicting Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker from the prequel trilogy. The client who recently ended his membership reminded me of the power of this Star Wars character possessed. And a similar potential for succumbing to the Dark Side. (Photo By big-ashb)
Self-fulfilling prophesy
I often shared this perspective with that client. I hoped doing so would encourage his leaning into the light of his Charmed Life. In doing so I forgot how effective I am as a creator. I forgot I create my reality, including how others show up, through what I focus on. Not what I want.
The more sessions we enjoyed, the more encouraged I got about his potential. But the more potential I saw, the stronger my thoughts about him “turning” got. Since I identify strongly with Jedi lore, I recognize a lot of momentum exists in me about that lore. What I didn’t realize was how powerfully they’d create the client I ended up with.
Later in our session evolution, I sensed a “disturbance” in his way of being. He started coming to sessions less prepared. He started offering pespectives reflecting doubt and suspicion. And he started questioning my path. He became a Positively Focused version of Anakin Skywalker. Right before my eyes! He even turned to the hard-work encouraging book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People!
One day he strongly disputed the validity of the personal reality unfolding in my life. Of course, he knew his opinion of my unfolding reality was irrelevant. And he knew such doubts would create realities for him that would eventually have him leave the practice. But that didn’t stop his momentum. A momentum amplified by my own focus.
Neither he nor I was surprised when he said he wanted to end his practice. He punctuated his departure with belligerent statements, feeling offended and again disparaging my path. Remarkably, these are similar behaviors Anakin showed toward his mentor Obi Wan. He even tried killing his mentor before becoming Darth Vader.
You get what you focus on
After that interaction with my client I realized I got what I focused on. I got a promising client who chose turning away.
Of course I did not want this outcome. But looking back on thoughts I focused on the most about this client, I must admit they mainly were about him turning away from his Charmed Life. So his choice is no surprise in retrospect. After all, I’m a powerful creator. I create my total reality. That includes versions of those with whom I interact. And that includes clients with whom I work.
I’m no exception to universal laws. Just like anyone else, I create what I focus on, not what I want. Focus is key. So if I want what I want, I must focus on that. In this case, I focused on something other than what I wanted.
And I got that.
I feel like Obi Wan Kenobi. Losing his promising apprentice, Anakin, rocked Obi Wan to the core. Unlike Obi Wan, however, I know everything always works out. So I’m not going into self-imposed exile like he did. I’m not going to quit my practice or quit helping others. The client who left will be fine. And I learned something awesome. It’s an experience I’ll remember, always.
And isn’t that the great thing about all “sucky” experiences? It’s the power of their “suckiness” that makes them such awesome experiences. That is, if one can see them as awesome, instead of sucky.
This experience made me a better creator; a better spiritual teacher as well. And for that, instead of feeling sad or sucky, I’m deeply appreciative.
Question: How do you know a person never dies? Is the soul really eternal? How can you prove this?
This question leads to a kind of Unified Theory of Eternal Life. What a worthy and considerable question!
Why is it worthy? Because a person’s “soul”, All That Is and the Universe want the person to know they’re eternal. They also want them knowing each person creates their reality as they live life. Only then can one live an authentic life.
That’s because if a person fears death, or what happens after death, life gets colored by that fear. Many people fear death. That fear generates much anxiety. And anxiety blocks authentic living.
While seeking proof will reveal proof, such proof doesn’t exist in “objective” form. That’s because life (even “after-life”) is 100 percent subjective. So proof reveals itself only in life’s subjectivity. In other words, only you can prove it to yourself. And when you do, evidence you find will come through intimate, personal experience.
Being subjective, such experience won’t convince others. Therefore, proving it definitively to others won’t work. All the evidence is first-person experiential.
First things first
Physical life experience – particularly the external-seeming, objective aspects – are projections of the soul’s experience onto itself. So the being experiencing physical life experiences an experience of self projected into the awareness of itself. That projection looks and feels as an apparent “objective” reality.
Why does it appear that way?
So the experiencer can experience “more” of itself as well as fulfill “intentions” central to who and what “self” is. So seeing proof of an eternal soul first requires knowing what you just read. That information gives context to proof you’ll find. The proof, in other words, will look like life experiences. Those experiences will “prove” convincing.
You also need lots of patience. Proof rarely comes in a flash. And when it does, it is often missed or it’s bewildering or incomprehensible. Like a barely remembered dream in the morning, if you don’t know how to recall it, or replicate it, you can’t hold onto it.
But with patience, the gradual, unhurried nature of All That Is will reveal everything (anything really) you’re wanting to know.
Making proof visible instead of impossible
Next tip: you’re surrounded by evidence of your eternal nature. You just can’t see it right now. Seeing the proof necessitates orienting your perception so evidence shows up in your perception. Instead of perception showing you the absence of the evidence. The absence of evidence is what you see when you think you’re mortal. Which is why people think death is real.
“Orienting” your perception doesn’t mean “doing something” in physical reality. Instead, it means “allowing yourself to realize” what you want to know. “Doing something” and “allowing yourself to realize” represent two distinct things.
Bear with me while I continue adding more context.
One way eternal life seekers complicate matters happens when they think or believe in ways making seeing proof difficult if not impossible. The word “soul” for example, generates belief constellations that work against “allowing yourself to realize”. I wrote about this before, here.
Beliefs are communicable too, just like some diseases. They get passed on through language primarily. You’ll notice you talk to yourself almost constantly. Much of that internal dialogue confirms and reconfirms beliefs, many of which work against seeing answers sought. So the next step involves realizing how language and beliefs muddle perception, then cleaning up language and belief.
Practical example time 😊
For example, look at the following two statements:
I want to see evidence that the soul never dies
I want to be the realizer of my eternal nature
Notice the action-oriented nature inherent in statement one. It also presumes no visible evidence. The speaker wants to see what they don’t see.
This statement affirms evidence’s absence instead of affirming evidence’s abundance. The perceiver wants to see something she currently does not, the “does not” component gets emphasized above all else. It creates “disbelief”.
Notice statement two is passive. The speaker speaks to evidence showing itself to her. Further, her statement expresses desire to become something, not see something. It also affirms existence of what she wants to realize. She understands her eternal nature is a thing and she expresses her desires around experiencing that.
These subtle distinctions make all the difference.
The word “proof” is problematic as well. “Proof” is adversarial. It says “show me because I don’t believe it.” Wanting proof affirms your doubt. It also offers confrontation. “PROVE IT” is the energy of the word “proof”.
See the subtlety?
Let’s put this all together
Ok, so now you have a sense of four important premises:
Evidence you want will occur as 100 percent subjective. It will only convince you. No one else.
Desired evidence surrounds you. Wanting to create evidence or discovering it distracts you from experiencing it. You’re wanting to realize the already-existing evidence. Or better said: you’re wanting to realize your eternal nature, which already always has/is existed/existing.
How you frame your request will either support your intent or defeat it.
Your beliefs will hinder or help you become the realizer of the answer to your question.
So now, the process is simple: you simply ask for the answer in a way that supports getting the answer…then hold to knowing the answer shows itself.
What happens next: you’ll experience events confirming your intent. Things start happening showing that you’re eternal. But you must keep the four points in mind. Also, you must constantly question thoughts and reactions which will stop the evidence flow dead in its tracks.
The evidence becomes evident
For example, one day at a bus stop or someplace familiar, someone you know may join you. You’ll strike up a conversation and this person may say something – mention a newspaper or magazine article, a website, a book, or tv show – that will cause within you an “a-ha!” moment. What they say will sound perfectly timed and related to your intent. Perhaps they will mention the show God Friended Me, for example, or the Netflix show, The Good Place, both having themes in eternal life. And then one of many different things might happen:
You will totally miss the relevance between the shows (and their premises) and your request. Here Universe and All That Is gave you a clue. But your beliefs will block the connection. So you’ll say something like “huh, interesting” and let the mention pass.
Maybe you’ll think “hmm, I just read a blog about seeing my eternal nature and here is someone telling me about a TV show about god and the afterlife.” And your mind then might go: “this is a coincidence” and you’ll miss the relevance.
OR….You may feel goose pimples or a shiver down your spine and think “This is no coincidence. This is evidence showing itself….” Then you’ll get excited….You might go home later and watch either show, enjoy the premise offered and then, be inspired to casually research online the word “serendipity”….
Do something like number three and you’re on your way.
Seeing overwhelming evidence
The seeming chance bus stop encounter began the realization. But if you aren’t alert, you’ll miss it. That’s how subtle Universe works. Your job remains maintaining alertness and expectation.
Keep this up and you’ll experience all kinds of evidence. They literally surround you:
You may be invited to an Ayahuasca event or a meditation session
Someone may start talking about eternity or life extension at a function you attend
A dream might happen where you experience events implying an eternal being
More events will happen confirming real what science calls “pseudoscience”.
And then, at some point, you’ll notice old beliefs gradually shifting. You’ll move through life differently. Your changed beliefs and lifestyle reveal more serendipitous opportunities making disbelief harder:
Dreams will become more and more lucid and engaging
You’ll start to want to know what your dreams are about
You’ll start playing with this whole idea that “you create your reality” and you’ll start getting evidence of that showing up all over your life
Then, really amazing things will start happening. Things that, in the past, you would have said “that’s coincidence” or “that’s impossible” or “random” or “confirmation bias” or some other nonsense. Only now you won’t say those things because they happen so often there’s too much of them proving they’re real.
By then you’re on your way.
The rest of the path is up to your realization. Keep it up and you will eventually realize what every sincere person realizes: life and everything in it, including you, is eternal and death is not the end. It’s only the beginning of more life.
It’s so fun helping clients discover they create their reality. I love participating in that unfolding. When such people discover their manifestation power, they realize they can create what they thought was impossible. Then their lives get really fun.
Of course, everything is possible. The only things keeping some things impossible are beliefs we hold. “That’s impossible” is a self-fulfilling prophesy.
Things change though when someone discovers they stand at the center of the Universe. There they realize they create everything around them. Including all the lovers they want…or the lack thereof. 🤷🏽♂️
Stories are powerful
One client’s personal experience showed how powerful, or disempowering, beliefs can be. She started practicing with me 36 sessions ago. Last week, something happened that amazed her.
During those 36 weeks, Jennifer (not her real name) uncovered many disempowering beliefs. They included beliefs about dating, about men, about men’s intentions. But they also included beliefs about Jennifer herself. These included beliefs like the following:
I’m not good enough to get what I want
I’m too fat to get the guy I want
Men only want me for sex
I’m too old
Time’s running out for me to find a guy
I never can find the right guy I want
Taken together these beliefs created Jennifer’s reality. What did that reality look like? One where men she met wanted her for sex only. Several often called her, but only when drunk. They demanded sexually explicit texts, wouldn’t talk on the phone, and when Jennifer pushed the issue, they would ghost her. Others made promises to meet in person, only to disappear later.
No wonder Jennifer, who happens to be transgender, formed negative beliefs about dating, about men and about men’s intentions.
It’s not that her beliefs weren’t true. After all, she formed many of them from past experience. But if Jennifer wants what she wants, she can’t expect to get it while holding beliefs about what she doesn’t want, no matter how true they are.
Beliefs are powerful. They can create more of the same. Or they can create what you want.
Abraham puts it plain. You get what you look at because what you look at forms your beliefs.
Choose: get what you want or be right
Jennifer had a choice. She could talk about what’s true and be right. Or she could create beliefs and talk about what she wants and get that.
For example, one belief she had about men was “I’ll never meet a nice guy locally”. Every guy she had met, she met through OKCupid. Desperation had her using online dating. No matter how many times I told her online dating works terribly, she kept using it.
That’s because she also believed it was the only way she met men. See how beliefs create reality? Her’s about not meeting local guys had her believing she could only meet men online. So that’s how she met them. And, the men she met there showed up consistent with her other beliefs. Especially beliefs about herself as a transgender woman.
The online experience only amplified her frustration, which in turn reinforced her beliefs. Again, Jennifer can’t entertain beliefs about her past and get what she wants. Instead, she must focus on what she wants. That’s what we focused on in the ensuing 36 sessions.
It’s amazing how many people prefer being right than get what they want, which is why they end up on medications, lonely or unhappy in life. (Photo by Molnar Balint)
Evidence starts proving it works
Over time, Jennifer’s new, empowering beliefs started creating realities consistent with themselves. It was rough going at first. Often Jennifer reinforced her old ones more than energizing new, more empowering ones.
However, there’s something cool about telling positive stories. Such stories enjoy enormous creative potential. You see, the Universe wants everyone to enjoy what they want, no exceptions. So when someone lines up with what they want by telling positive stories about it, they become a match to that. Then, that person gradually starts seeing evidence of what they want showing up everywhere.
That’s what happened with Jennifer. For example, men started waving at her as she walked down the street. Every time it happened, she said, she looked behind her to see if the guys were waving at someone else. Nope, they waved at her.
Or the male barista at the drive up kiosk would chat Jennifer up, where before he would ignore her. Another time a gas station attendant complimented her nails. And another time, a male restaurant sever paid particular attention to her as he attended the table she sat at with friends.
Ordinary people chalk these examples up to “coincidence” or some other logical explanation. But there’s no such thing as coincidence and logic has nothing to do with it! Everything happens on purpose. The purpose is reflecting back beliefs one tells about what’s happening.
The more Jennifer got this, the more such things happened.
Evidence grows more insistent
Until one day while walking her dog at the local dog park, a man who also had his dog approached her. He said hi and Jennifer returned the greeting. They enjoyed a nice conversation while their dogs played. Afterward, the guy said “Oh, dude, I gotta go. I’m late.”
Now Jennifer interpreted that as the guy misgendering her. We don’t know what his intentions really were, but I told her telling such a story was not in her best interest.
“It’s better to make up a story that you feel better about,” I said.
“Like what?” She asked.
“Like ‘the guy was using “dude” like some people do. It’s just a figure of speech, like an exclamation”,” I replied.
At first, Jennifer didn’t like that new story. But after some cajoling she admitted it felt better than the knee-jerk story she wanted to tell.
I told her telling such stories would create the next evidence that would knock Jennifer’s socks off.
And that’s exactly what happened next.
Every one can enjoy a relationship that knocks their socks off. Unless their beliefs run contrary to having that enjoyment. (Photo by Jeremy Bishop)
It bowls you over
Jennifer had other beliefs not related to men and dating. These needed attention too. The combination of beliefs, what I call a Belief Constellation, creates everyone’s reality. Jennifer’s constellation included many negative beliefs about her work and her manager. Those beliefs kept Jennifer on edge, defensive and feeling like a victim.
Feeling on edge, defensive and victimhood makes one a match to situations that exacerbate feeling those ways. And not just work situations, dating situations too. That’s why we needed to soothe Jennifer’s work beliefs too.
That took a while, but the better Jennifer felt, the more she wanted to do the practice. In time, evidence at work convinced her more and more her new beliefs were working.
Her boss complimented her more and more. She gave Jennifer more responsibilities. When Jennifer announced she was looking for openings in other departments, her manager offered to reclassify her job so she could get more pay. Finally, her manager came out and told Jennifer how much she valued her and how much she wanted Jennifer to stay.
Evidence at work was bowling Jennifer over. It amazed her that simply telling positive stories could literally change her relationship with her boss!
Then one day Jennifer texted me from work telling me how a process I taught her – called PRE-PAVING – helped change her work experience. In the text, she misspells it as “preparing”:
Then it happened
Riding on that positive momentum created what happened next. Jennifer felt good about changes happening at work. So much so, she softened on the idea that she couldn’t meet men in person. She started acknowledging evidence showing she was meeting men. It’s just that she hadn’t soothed negative beliefs enough to have such men approach her in person.
That all changed rather suddenly.
A few days after a remarkably powerful session, Jennifer sent me a text. It was awesome:
Many layers prove how powerful this experience was for Jennifer. For one, she didn’t have to do ANYTHING to meet this LOCAL, GORGEOUS guy other than follow her intuition to take Rocco out for walk. Second, there’s NO WAY ON EARTH she could have deliberately sought out this guy. It could only happen this way, a perfect orchestration of her unfolding reality.
Third, the guy did all the work. He approached her and initiated a conversation. But most of all, what’s super awesome about this rendezvous, is through it, Jennifer realized yet another belief she needs to clean up:
“He’s out of my league.”
However, even though that happened, she still had an experience totally contrary to EVERY experience she had in the past.
Every encounter a stepping stone
It’s really important at the point of receiving this experience that Jennifer enjoy the experience. Negatively judging herself does no good. Neither does harsh self-criticism about not doing something she thought she should have done. Everything worked perfectly here because this rendezvous wasn’t meant to be the perfect match or the perfect lover.
What it was, was an experience clarifying for Jennifer where she is on the path to becoming the perfect match to her perfect lover. How else will she know what disempowering beliefs remain in her constellation, if she doesn’t get to see her constellation in action? This experience worked perfectly.
It encouraged her. It created more desire in her. The fact that it happened gladdened her, inspiring her to the possibility that more such experiences can happen. It was a local connection! Something she thought impossible. And it showed that gorgeous men show interest in her.
So many disempowering beliefs got a dose of positivity just through this one experience. And so long as she remains in all these powerfully positive interpretations, Jennifer makes herself a match to more such experiences in the future.
Every client gets it
I love it when these kinds of things happen for my clients. Every client enjoys this kind of progression on their way to the love, the life, their greatest desires.
Everything is possible. Including having a relationship matching one’s wildest dreams. Nothing stands in the way of whatever anyone wants other than beliefs a person tells that are contrary to what’s wanted.
Clean those beliefs up though and watch how remarkable life gets.
Life is a wish-granting jewel. No matter what one wishes for, one can have it. One only need become a match to it, then draw that which is wished for to them as they hold themselves as a match to it.
I show clients how to do that. It’s easy, it’s fun and it works. Every time. You ready for your true love, your version of the Charmed Life Jennifer’s creating? I can help.
The best way to get everything one wants in life is to pursue what’s wanted because pursuing it is joyful. This is especially true when wanting something most people think is impossible. Such as “manifesting” more money, a relationship or a better job.
That’s because most people will tell you their opinion on how to get those things. And rarely will they offer the “manifesting” path. They’ll tell you “the odds” of you “manifesting” that thing. The’ll tell you getting something that way is “wishful thinking”.
They’ll tell you to be “realistic”. Being realistic means “trying hard”. It means doing what others do. It involves focusing with the end in mind and “faking it till you make it.”
All of those ways can work. But look around at people doing it that way. It’s hard work. People hate the process. And hardly anyone gets what they’re after, because the path is so filled with struggle many or most give up on what they want. Or worse, they compromise. They settle for something “ok” instead of holding out for their dream.
Compromising is what happens when someone goes after something thinking the result is what they’re after. If, however, a person goes after something, knowing the journey to that thing is what matters most, the entire process and experience of the process changes. It’s no longer a struggle, it’s a joy. The process of doing becomes the purpose of the doing, not the means to the ends. And in that mind space, what one wants happens fast.
Your action isn’t the main attraction
Why does this happen? Because when the mind isn’t focused on the end goal, the mind becomes open to millions of avenues leading to the goal instead of the one way one thinks it must happen.
Think about it. When focused on a particular goal, say, finding a lover, usually people think of one particular way to get that lover. The main way they think it must happen has to do mainly with their taking action to “make something happen”.
But the majority of people who get what they want, especially really big things they want, hardly ever get those things through their hard work. And usually, if they’re honest when asked, those people attribute “success” to “luck” or “god” or some other force greater than themselves that made it all possible. There’s truth to their attribution. Your action is not the main attraction.
Often, these people reach a point in their “doing” where they realize they’ve done all they can. With nothing more they can do, they give up. They surrender to “come what may”. Typically, once they give up, once they surrender, that thing they want shows up. It’s not the surrender that makes that happen. It’s what happens when they surrender.
Surrender to the journey
When one surrenders, they give up actions, but also thoughts standing between them and the easy flow of what is wanted. In other words, the person no longer stands in the way of what they want. Instead, in giving up, they become a cooperative element in the unfolding.
Another way of “surrendering” is giving up focusing on the end goal and instead enjoying the process, doing what one’s doing for no other reason than the joyful doing of the doing. A client and I talked about exactly this recently. Take a listen:
I have several really big things I’m “manifesting”. They include things 99 percent of humans will say can’t be done. But I know those things on my list are as easy for me as an eternal being, with the power of the Universe behind me, to accomplish as it is to walk from one room to another. However, I must relax into the process of their unfolding, because I too have residual belief in their impossibility.
It’s not the “impossibility” of the things I want keeping them from happening. It’s the belief in the impossibility slowing things down. So for someone like me, who wants really big things showing up, I must focus relentlessly on the journey as the goal rather than the goal itself. That’s why I see, nearly every day, evidence of their unfolding.
Everyone can enjoy fulfilled wishes
Compared to what’s on my list, finding a partner or a job or whatever is easy as pie. All that’s required is giving up thoughts contrary to what one wants. Thoughts contrary to what one wants aren’t the only ones that must go though. Thoughts seemingly having nothing to do with the goal also must go. This is why it seems to take forever for people to “manifest” something.
They aren’t willing to surrender. Meaning, they aren’t willing to give up what they must to have what they want.
Anyone can have what they want no matter what it is because the Universe is a wish-granting jewel ready to deliver ANYTHING someone can formulate desire for.
All that’s required is focusing on the reason why one wants what they want rather than focusing on the thing wanted. Doing that will naturally put one in alignment with the wanted thing, so long as the reasons feel good.
If a person can remain in those good feelings, instead of thinking about how lonely they are, or how impossible the goal seems, they’ll get what they want. It’s that easy.
Feeling good is like finding
It’s easy because when a person focuses on why they want and feel good in that, the desire itself becomes more important than the fulfillment. They don’t need the thing they want, because they already feel good without it. So the desire’s fulfillment becomes irrelevant. When a person gets there, then having what they want is icing on the cake because they already feel as they will feel when what they want comes. Feeling good about what you want is as good as having it. And when you’re there, what you want must show up.
It’s not hard shifting that focus. It can happen in as little as five minutes. You know you’ve done that when you feel good right now, even without having what you want. And again, when you feel good, you’re closer to having what you want than you think.
If you want to know more about how this all works, set up a free 1:1 and let’s talk. Let’s discover how easy it is to have anything you want. It’s not as impossible as you think. All you need is more happy. Then everything in life will come on its own accord.
There’s great power in managing vibration so that one stands in a high flying state. Doing so, one can literally shape others’ experiences. One can also shape other people. A powerful example of that happened this week with a client.
This client finds himself profoundly affected by his Positively Focused practice, which spanned some four months. But this week, like many clients, he came having had a rough few days. So when he showed up to the session, he wasn’t ready for what happened.
When I help clients attain vibrational mastery, I create a vibrational bubble in which I hold the session. Every session feels the same because of this. The high vibrational state I create then hold during the session “pulls” clients from wherever they are, to where I am. That’s why, unlike traditional therapyor counseling, every client enjoys extremely satisfying sessions containing powerful insights and breakthroughs.
A compelling offer
This time, however, I brought a lot more vibrational mastery to the table than usual. That’s because I meditated prior to the session, using a process which increases one’s vibrational focus. I also used another process because I wanted to amplify the great feeling I felt after meditation.
By the time I came to the session, I was bouncing off the walls with intense, positivity, appreciation and joy. So much so, the client’s socks got blown off.
The disparity between where he was and where I was was so great, he had to join me. He literally had no choice because my mastery was so strong.
So when the client came into my bubble, his negative vibration had no place to go but outta here! 😂.
Which is why, after the session, he sent this:
Creating people on demand
When it comes to relationships, most people try to manipulate, convince, “love” (it’s not really that), bribe, blackmail or blame their partners into being someone they can be happy with. That hardly ever works. Indeed, the whole idea of “love languages” is part of the problem with relationships. Expecting someone to be a certain way so you feel better is a recipe for disaster. It’s also not loving.
Loving is unconditional. That means, no matter how a person might be, you still love them. That’s hard when vibrational mastery eludes you.
But with vibrational mastery, not only can you love a person no matter how they are, when you do, THEY CHANGE.
The best way to change someone is to come into alignment with the version of the person you want to experience. Then the person you’re with changes into that person. Vibrational mastery makes that possible.
Trying to change people through action or words hardly ever works. When it does work, it rarely lasts. It often also creates resentment. But using vibration, you can make any change you want permanent. And people love you for it.
It’s just like what my client experienced. And I wasn’t even trying!
Want a powerful relationship with those you love, those you work with and those you care about? Stop trying to change them. Attain vibrational mastery and watch how much power you have to produce wonderful results. Including creating versions of people who match your every desire.
A client echoed what many of my clients feel after learning how to cultivate a positive focus about their lives and things they want in life, including jobs, money, love, peace of mind and more.
A five-month veteran of the practice, his life transformed dramatically over this time. No wonder he’s doubling down on his Positively Focused life view, about relationships and about himself. He knows it’s the best way to get what he wants in every aspect of his life.
Furthermore, he knows the power behind why being Positively Focused works so well. It makes everything possible. Including turning around, in just a couple weeks, circumstances which had this client contemplating suicide.
Anyone can easily eliminate suicidal thoughts. It happens once someone understands then uses the power of being Positively Focused.
That’s what this client did. In a couple weeks, he no longer even thought about killing himself. Now, he’s so clear he’s god in human form, he’s glad he made the choice to connect with this practice rather than going to a therapist:
He’s right on another thing. Mass shootings in the US wouldn’t happen if people understood why emotions exist and where they come from. Ignorant of this, some get so far down emotionally, feeling powerless and insecure, shooting up a school, church or grocery store becomes their only hope at feeling power.
Such events needn’t happen. But so long as people don’t understand their internal, eternal nature, they will keep happening. So will suffering. Eckhart Tolle wasn’t playing when he talked about how unnecessary suffering can be:
Suffering: still necessary?
I love how clients get that suffering no longer need exist in their lives. I love then watching them tune their lives so their lives match stories they tell about how they want their life, instead of how it is.
The more they do that, the more powerful they get. Then the more free they get. Before long, life for them becomes adventurous. Then they get the life they knew was possible. Their life becomes the Charmed Life I write about here.
We suffer because we know, deep down, life as the great adventure. It contains everything we want, flowing to us easily. But for so many, that’s not the life they live.
I want everyone living their happiest life. Therapy does work for some. But it has a terrible success rate. Telling positive stories works 100 percent of the time. Positive story telling is one of the best kept life secrets.
Although it’s not a secret. People have shared this life approach for…ever.
Isn’t it about time you got in on the secret? If so, I can help!
A transgender client from our sister site The Transamorous Network recently came to her session feeling ecstatic. I immediately became so too. That’s because I knew, even before she described what happened, what happened. She scored her dream career.
How? Solely by thinking positive thoughts. I’m sharing this successful manifestation from my sister site (I do this often) because it offers proof that “manifesting” works, every time.
I know many will say this was a series of coincidences. But me and this client know what happened directly resulted from her learning to see the world Positively Focused. As a result, she easily came into her dream job with absolutely no effort on her part. Instead she had fun, fun, fun.
“I told my mom,” she said. “Getting work this way is 1,000 times more satisfying than going through the grind everyone else is doing.”
Indeed. All during this time, her mom forwarded my client job openings from Indeed.com, hoping her daughter would apply. But my client wanted to prove to herself a positive focus works better. I’m glad she wanted to test it, because the results were stunning. As they always are.
Here’s what happened.
Becoming a match to what’s wanted
Clare (not her real name) is on her 123rd session. It took her a while to start believing, but evidence she produced along the way roused dramatic behavioral changes. For one, she gave up online dating. She finally agreed it created more negative experiences than positive ones and those negative experiences too easily translated into negative beliefs about men. Negative beliefs about herself too. Those beliefs exacerbated her negative online experiences. That got her realizing trying to find a partner through online dating wasn’t worth it.
Then she gave up trying to “find” a guy altogether. Instead, she decided to focus on herself. She decided rather than meeting men who matched who she’s being now, she would become the “best version of herself” and, doing that, meet men who are a match to that.
It’s a standard result of the approach advocated at The Transamorous Network and here too at Positively Focused. Every experience comes as a manifestation of what the experiencer emanates. That emanation happens through thoughts and beliefs people hold about experiences had in the past, or experiences they want to have. The best way to meet the perfect partner involves first becoming a match to that. One does that by thinking positive thoughts and cultivating positive belief about a host of subjects. Those gradually change emanations one’s putting out about those subjects.
In time, one becomes a match to what they want, rather than being a match to what they don’t want. This process happens effortlessly. With enough practice, the process then happens automatically. Delight, surprise, life enjoyment and an ever-increasing desire for more of that mark “success” with the process. Oh, one also gets everything they want too!
How reality really works.
The sucky job hunt
As Clare focused on herself, a lot of resistance she held for many subjects started giving way. In the wake of all that, she discovered more peace and satisfaction with the way her life currently was. For many years, for example, Clare harbored impatience, frustration and annoyance about living with her parents on a farm in rural America.
But through the practice, she learned how to appreciate this situation. Indeed, living with her parents offered exactly what she wanted. The biggest thing was time. Her parents love her, provide for her. Even though they want her to get on with living – get a job, find a place to live on her own and make a life for herself – they also aren’t pressuring her to do those things.
I encouraged Clare see value in all that support. But Clare focused too much on what she thought her parents thought about her living there. As a result, Clare felt pressure, anxiety and impatience. Those emotions motivated her to look for a job.
But looking for a job sucks! It’s tedious, there’s a lot of rejection, and, depending on one’s self-image, it can be demoralizing. Especially when one sees how many jobs one doesn’t qualify for. In many ways, job hunting closely resembles online dating! 😂
Clare wavered between frustration and annoyance, then disappointment and anger as she sent out resume after resume to crickets and rejection.
All the while I encouraged her to give up job hunting and learn to create the job she wants. How? By telling positive stories about what she wants, instead of trying to find a “job”.
Would you jump off a cliff?
I know everyone, or at least most people, look for jobs exactly the way Clare was. And, many of those people find work that way. But it sucks doing it that way! Yes, people find satisfaction working for good companies and for good people. Good pay too. The opposite also holds up. In other words, just because everyone does something a certain way, doesn’t make it the way. Or the only way. Or the best way.
Besides, spiritual beings don’t come into a body to copy experiences everyone else experiences. Each comes to live their special, unique paradigm-busting life experience. One that would transform the world while offering immense personal satisfaction.
I explained all this to Clare, many, many times before she actually believed it enough to apply this approach to attracting work. By this time Starbucks hired her as a barista, which was great because their insurance plan paid for surgeries she wanted. She liked the job, at first. She enjoyed who she worked with and customers she served. Beyond that, insurance and a paycheck though, it offered little satisfaction.
It took about six months before Clare was over Starbucks. She wanted work in her field. Something creative. Something more consistent with her aspirations.
Week after week, dissatisfaction increased. Finally, she decided to try the Positively Focused approach.
Getting stories straight
It took her a while to find pleasing beliefs. Subjects she had beliefs about that impacted “getting a job” were many and varied. They included beliefs about work, obviously, but also about many other things.
About work, Clare needed to sooth old beliefs about her not being good enough to have her dream job. She believed such jobs were scarce. You need to know someone in order to get such a job, she thought. She also thought a person needed to live in an urban center, where creatives lived. None of these are true. They aren’t false either. But such stories create a reality that excludes getting the job Clare wanted.
Other beliefs she needed to address were about living at home, about her parents and what they thought, about why she wanted work, about the timeframe in which she “should” start working and more. As I said above, beliefs about lots of subjects affect success in any outcome. Beliefs about what’s wanted, for example, contribute only partially to what one gets or doesn’t get. Often, beliefs hindering one’s ability to get what they want have more to do with beliefs the person has about themselves. Those hinder the vast majority of people.
So Clare had her work set out for her. The main thing I encouraged Clare do was enjoy her now. Have fun, I told her. Find things she liked doing and forget about finding a job. Enjoy the fact that her parents lovingly support her. Enjoy the fact that she doesn’t really need a job.
That’s what Clare started doing.
Getting stories straight means adjusting what I say about life so that my life reflects my adjusted stories back to me. The Universe works no other way. Harness this and the world becomes yours.
Getting bored doing nothing
In essence, I told Clare “stop doing and be more”. That’s a problem for many, many people because most of us think and believe things happen as a result of “doing”.
That’s never the case though, even though it looks that way. But the way things look is an illusion. Things happen as a result of what a person thinks and believes and expects. Action is what happens at the last moment. Action, or doing, puts a person at coordinates in space and time where the desired manifestation happens.
But again, this is really, really difficult for people to get. Especially parents. They think doing nothing is doing nothing. It’s lazy, mooching, being irresponsible.
None of that is true. Doing nothing is doing something. When a person does nothing, they’re soothing negative story momentum. Stories that keep them in “doing mode”, the doing of which keeps them thinking their doing creates results.
Clare had a really hard time with this at first. She quickly got bored. Video games no longer held her interest. Movies got old. She got impatient, frustrated. We talked about these feelings and beliefs they sprang from and, in time, created new ones for Clare about those things. Those new ones allowed Clare greater ease and satisfaction with things she once liked doing.
It took awhile, but Clare found more satisfaction and pleasure in pastimes once she let go of judgement about those things, judgement, representing beliefs she inherited from her parents and society in general. Especially conservative society which harshly condemns idle hands.
Then things get interesting
One day after weeks enjoying her life, Clare came to her session feeling inspired. She had cruised Instagram this week, something she really enjoys, and her feed served up an invitation to a panel presentation on something like “How to manage production sets in a time of COVID”.
Now’s a good time to include that Clare’s field of choice, where her creative passions point her, involves working on creative production sets. Photo shoots and movie sets are where Clare feels most inspired and engaged. So when this invitation showed up, she knew it was the result of the practice.
“I knew this wasn’t coincidence,” She told me in session. “So I wanted to share it with you. I’m really excited this happened.”
I was too. It was exactly the manifestation Clare wanted. Furthermore, I knew, I just knew, this was the beginning of a series of manifestations leading to Clare getting everything she wants.
We talked about the best way to attend the event. I encouraged her, if she was so inspired, to write down every panel participant’s name and what they say. Then later, followup with each of them with an inspiring message over Instagram. I suggested she highlight something each person said that resonated with her. That resonance, I told her, offered a clue that would unfold in a delightful way.
So notice this: Clare relaxed into her life. She learned to enjoy more and more her day-to-day. She learned to stop telling negative stories about everything about her life. Then, the universe served up the perfect invitation: the opportunity to participate in this discussion.
It was perfect. But more stood ready.
Life happens easy when one takes it easy.
Momentum ensues
The next session, Clare was super excited. She reached out to all the panelists. Nearly all of them replied. Three of them invited her to an in person conversation. Long story short, one of these conversations happened on a photo set in a small company owned and run by a lesbian couple.
Clare’s manifestation was unfolding…
Clare said she could tell she impressed them. She was high flying in relating how the conversation went. She added the other conversations thrilled her too, but this one was the most thrilling.
“Go with that feeling,” I told her. And she did.
She continued corresponding with those panel members who responded to her most actively. Then, one day, seemingly out of the blue, Clare got a voice message from someone she didn’t know.
The voice message told her a corporate gig was coming up and, if she was available, the voice said, they’d love to have her join the team running the shoot.
Clare just got an employment offer!
Manifestation…happens
That same day, she put the details together with the caller. By the time we had our session that afternoon, the opportunity was hers. It came together literally an hour before our session began.
Needless to say, Clare was over the moon. She told me her mother and father both expressed pride in her getting her first paid gig, in her field of choice, with lots of opportunities to leverage this experience into future gigs.
But Clare and I both know the only leverage she needs is the leverage inherent in her power as a deliberate creator, exercised through her powerful story telling.
“I told my mom,” she said. “Getting work this way is 1,000 times more satisfying than going through Indeed.com.”
Indeed. When a person creates opportunity, it’s always more satisfying than going hunting for one. It’s much more fun seeing what one wants come to you rather than you having to go out and find it.
Whether it’s work, income, a lover, better health or happiness, nothing lies out of the realm of the possible. Unless one’s beliefs say something is impossible, nothing is.
If you’re someone lonely and longing for love, or you want better work, more money or something else you think will make you happy, there’s no better Source for any of that than the beliefs you tell yourself.
YOU are the genie in the bottle standing ready to fulfill your every wish! If you’re ready to tell better stories about your life so that your life improves, and would like some help with that, I’m here.
A delightful post script:
I finished writing this post and the next week, had a session with Clare. She came to the session overflowing with excitement. That’s because after doing the gig described above, “out of the blue” three other people called her. They all offered additional gigs, at rates 21 percent higher than the first one! One of the newer gigs is a 4-5 day shoot, meaning Clare will receive over $1400 for 4 days work!
“This sure beats my Starbucks job!” She said. “I used to make maybe $50 a day there.”
Indeed. Once a person gets in the grove telling positive stories, the flood gates open, revealing that the Universe, for sure, is pouring down everything one wants. Clare’s experience is a perfect example of that!
Question: What is the best method of the Law of Attraction? Why Do these methods work for some and do not work for others?
I’ve already answered the first question here and here. I want to focus on your second question. It’s more important.
Law of Attraction works in every case. If it worked for some and not for others, it wouldn’t be what the word “Law” implies. BTW, Law of Attraction is not really a “law”. That word suggests someone created this process by which all things must comply. No one did that. It’s always been, just like you and me.
Since Law of Attraction does apply to everyone and everything, it must be “working” for everyone and every thing (which it does). So why do some get what they want and others don’t?
Everyone gets what they focus on
It’s an extremely important question. The answer is, everyone IS getting what they want. But you must understand what “what they want” means in order to understand why everyone’s getting what they want, even those who think they aren’t getting what they want, or thinking Law of Attraction isn’t working.
The Universe doesn’t care about what a person wants. All it’s doing is fulfilling desire. It seems like those two things, desire and getting what you want, are the same.
But from the universe’s perspective, they are not.
Desire from universal perspective, is energy, focused. Getting what you want is a choice. Desire is what summons life force. “Getting what you want” is the result of channelled desire. So desire supersedes getting what you want. It is a larger concept. Getting what you want expresses a focus of desire turning into a result. Does that make sense?
Having made that important distinction, it’s easy to see why Law of Attraction seems not to work for some people. Law of Attraction is fulfilling desire. But it’s also responding to resistance, which is a kind of blocking force humans add to the process of getting what they want through beliefs that are contrary to what they want.
When Law of Attraction kicks into gear, it “knows” what a person is focusing on, and going to work to coordinate that into reality. But if a person is focused more on what they don’t want, or if they’re focused in a way that creates resistance against what they want, then they’re going to get what they’re focusing on: lackluster, or no results at all, or so it seems.
It works who don’t believe
So what one focuses on is what one gets. Not what they want. Unless they focus purely on what they want. For example, someone who believes Law of Attraction doesn’t work, and so tries to make Law of Attraction work as a way of proving it won’t work, will get results proving it won’t work because that’s what they’re focusing on. Even if they try to get what they want, but their predominant beliefs say “Law of Attraction doesn’t work”, they won’t get what they want because their beliefs put resistance in the way, which keeps them from getting what they want.
Those who refuse to test it, and just believe “it doesn’t work”, will see all around them evidence of it not working. They’ll also rendezvous with people with similar results, as Law of Attraction is drawing to them what they’re focused on.
The same is true for someone who, for example, wants a boyfriend, but doesn’t believe they are attractive enough, or smart enough, or successful enough.
Or they might not believe such a boyfriend exists, or that he exists in their local area, or if he does, that person won’t find them interesting. Thoughts matter, in other words.
Negative results are positive
When someone uses Law of Attraction and they don’t get what they want, that’s Law of Attraction giving that person pertinent information.
How does someone know where their focus is, if it’s off, and they can’t tell that it’s off? The answer: They can’t.
So this is another scenario in which Law of Attraction is working, even when people think it’s not. In this case, it’s showing the manifest-er where their dominant focus is, which is very important, isn’t it? That way, they can do something about their faulty “aim” so to speak.
So there’s no evidence Law of Attraction works for some and not others. It works for everyone. If someone thinks it’s not working, they should look at what they’re thinking and focusing on.
Law of Attraction is working. It’s just giving them what they’re focusing on. That’s not necessarily what they want.
But it is, in a way, because by getting what they don’t want, at least they know what they need to do next: focus on what they want better than they have up to now.
