The more selfish I am, the more joy I bring to other people. It’s uncanny, unbelievable perhaps, but true. That’s because the more selfish I am in living my life, the more I empower others to be that way too. And the more selfish people are, the better their lives get.
Everyone creates their reality. There are no exceptions to this. It’s why I assert with my clients that “reality” is 100 percent subjective. If it weren’t, none of what I offer my clients would hold as accurate. And life experience would be perilous indeed.
No one can create for us. No one can come into our experience and do something we don’t invite. Such statements present precarious situations for some. People in “victim mode” will argue for their self-imposed limitations, saying such statements are irresponsible. Similar people feeling equally insecure, but from a different perspective, claim such statements “blame victims”.
But there are no victims. Well, there are victims. But perpetrators and victims are one in the same. That’s because everyone creates their experiences. That is the one rule for which no exceptions exist.
We stand alone in our created realities
While some stridently disagree, others will (rightly) find tremendous freedom and empowerment in such statements. For if every person creates their reality, then each person can enjoy any kind of reality they want. The only limitations on such enjoyment are those each person creates for themselves.
Think of it. No one stands between where we are and what we want. Our experiences stream from our awareness just as automatically as our legs move when we decide we want to walk from one place to another. The mechanism of walking is exactly the same as reality creation. So it makes sense then to understand how “walking” happens, what’s involved and how to leverage that process more deliberately.
Once that happens, one discovers the fantastic nature of reality: that we each stand in our separate, but overlapping, created realities. We’re sovereign in our existence. And in our sovereignty, great joy awaits.
Great joy: that’s what I offer my clients.
Little by little, life improves
Now, the great thing about physical reality is, nothing happens instantly. What we have happened gradually. It came into existence as an unending stream of manifestations. So too will that which we want. To get what we want, we must know it won’t happen at once. Like our life as it is, the new life will come gradually.
The uninitiated don’t understand this. So they wobble in their focus. Then they get wobbly results. Or more of the life they already have. But the initiated learn to hold fast on what they desire. They don’t wobble in their focus. As a result, their life gradually resembles or reflects, everything they want.
Getting there should happen effortlessly. But because most of us forget this life way, we’ve cultivated habits running counter to that effortless life; that Charmed Life I write about constantly. Showing clients how to soothe such habits forms the primary steps of my client work.
The power of selfish living
But no one needs me to discover joyful living. All one need do is adopt new habits and hold them over time. New habits aligned with outcomes people want. Abraham recently offered guidance on this in an email:
It sounds easy. But for many, it’s not. That’s why people like me exist. I offer support for folks. Through a client relationship, I see things about people they can’t see. I use that insight in service, gradually pointing out, then offering alternatives to disempowering ways of being.
In time, everyone gets that for which they came. Some get more than expected, to their great delight and wonder. I especially enjoy working with those clients. That’s because their delight and wonder amplifies my version of those feelings.
And that’s why I do what I do. My purpose is selfish. In serving others in this way, I serve myself. I amplify my own focus and practice, further cultivating beneficial habits. Habits which get reflected back to me in my own created reality.
As a result, I enjoy the Charmed Life. So in sharing my Charmed Life experience, I get more of that. While also helping others develop their version of what I enjoy.
Is there really a better life than that? I don’t think so.
Western culture worships a false idol. It’s called hard work. Look around. So many people on average spend upwards of half or more of their time awake working. Some dedicate far more of their waking hours to working hard.
Americans in particular are known for their workaholism. A client of mine on vacation in Spain talked with someone, a Spaniard, who described her opulent and leisure lifestyle. In doing so, she said “Americans live to work. We Spaniards work to live.“
There’s no honor in Americans venerating working hard. If we knew more about how life works, our work life preoccupation would dramatically decrease, with no corresponding decrease in production, believe it or not.
Indeed, the easy life carries far more productivity potential. That’s because when one takes it easy, following both intuition and passion instead of doing what others expect of them, remarkable things happen. And they happen because them happening expresses nature’s grace for all living things.
Runaway success is natural
Take a look at the paradox described by “working hard“. Many people work very hard in their lives and barely get anywhere. The working poor are a great example. But so are many of the middle class. Many people in the middle class struggle mightily working hard and just barely cover their means. Or they get far enough to amass material pleasures. But since many middle class people finance such things, they end up working even harder to pay off credit cards, big mortgages and car loan debt.
Others enjoy a smattering of success evidenced by promotions, vanity titles or a real supervisory role. But those “successes“ usually lead to more work as well.
And when it comes to runaway success, an even greater paradox exists. Some of the most successful put in hardly any work at all and find success near immediately, while others work very hard in the same field and get comparatively nowhere.
Take the case of Sir Lewis Hamilton, the first brown-skinned Formula One driver. He is described as a “prodigy“ race car driver. From a very early age, his parents saw his instinctual attraction to racing. Everyone saw it. So everyone supported him as he rose far beyond others. Others working equally hard, and some working even harder.
Hamilton could easily do behind the steering wheel what others rarely or never could do. Indeed, his “hard work“ was more about further developing his natural gifts, his passions, not struggling to achieve “success “ or accomplish anything.
Something else must be happening
I was just about to write “not to diminish the effort Hamilton put into becoming a skillful driver”. But my desire to write that evidences my own indoctrination into our collective distortion; the distortion that “hard work” is the key to success. If it were the key to success, if it were instrumental in things going the way we want, why are so many working so hard not successful?
Which leads me to the following. Something else must be happening that allows some people to succeed with little effort and others, despite lots of hard work, hardly ever get anywhere. This is the case for something larger having more influence on one’s success than how much effort or action one dedicates toward that goal.
Why is it some people who work so hard achieve comparatively little?
I assert the answer has nothing to do with their hard work. Instead, it has far more to do with their attitude.
But even that is too superficial. It’s less about “attitude“ and more about resonance, or lack thereof, one feels for whatever it is one decides is “success“. One’s image of oneself, what one believes is possible, and what one chooses to do from those perspectives shapes everything.
Action of any kind means comparatively little.
The easy life for all
That resonance giving rise to inevitable success feels a certain way. And that feeling indicates a gradually emerging life that, initially, feels better than what it feels like when working 40 or more hours a week. It feels like freedom, adventure, positive expectation and empowerment on a consistent basis.
Most people experience such feelings infrequently or not at all. Such experiences explain why so many struggle or live mediocre lives or lives of compromise. Such people haven’t cultivated a resonance atmosphere within which success comes easy. They’re too busy trying to get there by copying what others do: trying to get there through action and hard work. They won’t slow down and get in touch with that which will make their life easy. They think the easy life is being lazy. So the Charmed Life I describe eludes them.
We all enjoy free will. All That Is wants us focusing our time and action living the easy life. That’s because doing so adds to or fulfills that which we each as individuals came to fulfill. And in that fulfillment, All That Is becomes more.
People who struggle contribute to more too. But how many of those people – were they in their right mind instead of the mind that has them indoctrinated into hard work – how many of those people would trade what they have for the easy life? I would argue that, in their right mind, everyone would make that trade.
That’s because everyone knew that’s the life they would live before coming into the world. That easy life. The life Jesus proclaimed in his sermon on the mount. I wrote about this two posts ago.
Nature wants you happy
Instead, so many of us choose lives of struggle. We all have free will, as I’ve said. We are all also eternal. So eventually, each of us, as individuals, learn to give up the hard life for the easy one. For many, that takes several lifetimes.
But for a select few, it can happen in this lifetime. By “select few“ I don’t mean to imply that someone else, like some god, blesses the lucky ones. The select few select themselves. They are those who connect with paths such as the one offered here at Positively Focused.
And when those people plug-in, their life becomes the easy life. In time, they leave hard work behind.
Many of the struggles we see in the world stem from people working hard and in doing so becoming discouraged and bitter. They’re disconnected from who they knew themselves to be. I suggest we give up all of that. And when we do so, we will realize a global society based on the Charmed Life I advocate.
When that happens we can give up worshipping the false idol that is hard work. Then get on with living lives we came to live.
The best way to create a better, happy life starts with learning how to do nothing. When people discover the power of doing nothing, life really starts taking off. In a short time, it not only gets better, life feels happier.
Most people instead get caught up in the “doing disease”. They think happy, better lives come from doing things that will, supposedly, make them happy. But what they find is, all that doing leads to a whole lot more doing. And rarely does the doing make the person happy.
Before they know it, the person’s at the end of their life, regretting they spent so much time doing as well as not doing what they could have done. Doing is the dis-ease that can rob one of life.
So many think all we need “to do” is do more of what others are doing and we’ll find happiness. So that’s what we do. We work hard, sacrifice, put off joy now for joy later…
I know that path personally. I worked almost 30 years before I realized the secret to happiness was doing less.
Doing is drudgery
Before that realization, doing had me doing what everyone else did. It worked. Sometimes. Looking back, though, all that hard-earned money, lofty positions that looked good on paper but took their toll on my personal life satisfaction, wasn’t worth the happiness I enjoy now, doing a lot of nothing besides attending to my spiritual happiness.
It’s really crazy how so many people, especially Americans, tie their happiness to work. While it’s true work can be fulfilling, that fulfillment depends on landing work that feels fulfilling. Maybe that’s why 50-80 percent of people hate their work. So what’s the answer? Where does happiness happen?
I suggest it lies in the heart and mind, not in an external situation. Which means, of course, the difference between those fulfilled at work, doing, and those hating what they’re doing lies in what they’re thinking about what they’re doing.
The best way to change how one thinks first comes with understanding how one currently thinks. That’s where becoming Positively Focused starts.
Until a person figures out their thinking patterns and habits, it’s too easy to stay trapped in the doing the disease, trying to create a different result by doing the same things.
I’m glad I found the way out of all that. The way out being doing nothing. It seems crazy, but it’s true. Here’s why.
You match what you’re getting
First, the reason so many seek happiness through doing, yet fail to find it, is because they’re trying to get something they don’t believe they can have. Or they’re looking for it in the wrong place. I talk about this with every client. A person can’t find something they think they can’t find. That’s the case for keys, lost gloves and, frankly, a happy life.
If someone thinks life isn’t fun and easy, they can’t experience the fun and ease of life. No matter how hard they try creating that, it will evade them. A person just can’t create outside of their existing beliefs. And what a person believes often lies hidden in thoughts they’re thinking so often, they can’t consciously perceive the thoughts when they think them.
Insecurities proceed us all
The fact is, if a person thinks life is a struggle, people are out to get them (or don’t care about them), or that their life has no meaning or other similar thoughts, the insecurity or anxiety such thoughts trigger tells the thinker what they’re thinking about life, people or the meaning of life is inconsistent with how life actually is.
What’s more, those thoughts will create life experiences consistent with them. Life will occur as a constant struggle, people will be predatory and life will feel meaningless. And once such thoughts create life experience consistent with them, momentum behind those thoughts is so great, those thoughts continue creating life experience on their own. Until the thinker generates momentum in a different direction.
This is why life seems “the way it is”, like some objective reality. Instead of the subjective reality life really is. Life is a subjective reality under direct control of the person experiencing the reality.
Instead of taking control though, people become victims of that auto-created life. Which means becoming victims of their uncontrolled thinking processes. They try harder. They do more, push, struggle more, thinking if they do all that, they’ll finally get what they want.
It doesn’t work that way. Life gives what you think about. Not what you want.
Doing it different?
Doing nothing begins an important process. That process reverses momentum created when a person keeps doing the same thing over and over, while expecting different results. When someone calms themselves, relaxes and focuses inward, powerful processes get underway even though it seems like nothing happens.
And the more that person relaxes into doing nothing, the more effective they get. That’s because every person receives guidance through their intuition, their Inner Being or Broader Perspective. Doing nothing tunes one into all that timeless wisdom.
What really happens is, by doing nothing, the person calms down noise in their head. That way they start hearing clear signals their intuition sends all day, every day.
In time, the person realizes some profound insights. Like this client:
Uncovering such insights takes a while. And this is the challenge. So many people in our lives tell us doing nothing is lazy and time wasting. But it’s not that. It’s a profound state of being which tunes one back into their deeper knowing.
But if you listen to society, parents, educators and all those loud mouths in the peanut gallery, you’ll hear “stop being lazy”, “work harder”, “success is in the struggle”.
It works but it’s tough
Such approaches work. But do you really want to struggle through life? I don’t. I’d rather enjoy life while seeing my life bringing me everything I want with little effort.
People who struggle claim it’s worth the struggle. They look at and display scars they “earned” on the way to their success. I say give that approach up, especially when it comes to finding happiness.
Instead, figure out how to instantly become a match to the happiness so often sought but not found. When it shows up, you will be a match to it because the instant you create it, you ARE a match to it. You’re happy. Stay in that and a happy life becomes yours.
A better way exists. It starts with doing nothing, which really is doing a lot. Learning to do nothing transforms life. My clients know this. It’s time for you to know it too.
A lot of people find anxiety relief through medications. Nearly all those people don’t realize they don’t need medication to rid themselves from anxiety.
That’s because anxiety is a blessing. Left unchecked though, it can become a curse. It can enslave one in discomfort. So much discomfort the only choice that person thinks they have is relief through a pill.
The medical profession is only too quick to oblige people who suffer from anxiety. That’s why almost 20 percent of Americans find themselves with anxiety “disorders”.
But anxiety gets labeled a “disorder” needing “treatment” because so many don’t understand the benefit anxiety brings to those with it. Now, I already can hear the rebuttal:
“Easy for you to say,” some anonymous reader may offer. “You don’t struggle with anxiety.”
Well, I respond, listening to me might be a good idea then. Because you’re right, I don’t. Or if not me, take the example of a client who just today instantly caused their anxiety to disappear.
How emotions benefit
She came to her session complaining about sleeping poorly the night before. We explored the reasons and the main one was a “general anxiety.” I explained why anxiety shows up for her and suggested she could benefit from the benefits her anxiety offered.
We talked about that briefly, then we dove into an exercise which brought her near instant relief. I’m sharing that exercise here. But first, here’s why anxiety is beneficial.
Anxiety, like any emotion, tells humans something they must know. If they want fulfilling, happy lives, the must know what emotions tell them. But if you ask ten random strangers (or strange friends 😊) why we have emotions, i.e. what their purpose is, you won’t get good answers. Most people don’t know why emotions exist.
Emotions give us clues about how to get everything we want. I talk about this and how to use the clues with clients every week. It takes convincing, of course. That’s because other people convince us they know better than our emotions about what’s right for us.
But for those who use their emotions correctly, charting a path to happiness is inevitable. That’s why emotions – including anxiety – exist. They help us discover our happiness. They also light up the path to everything we want.
Negative emotions such as anxiety offer far more benefit than positive ones. But when used incorrectly or not at all, they can spell trouble. And when people mask them with drugs, their benefits get masked too.
How to get the benefit
The key to unlocking those benefits looks like using emotions for their intended purpose. That means using negative, or unwanted, emotions to chart a course to more positive, better feeling ones. That’s the purpose of the exercise I gave my client.
It worked near instantly. And, she could tell it worked that fast. Looking at her face and reactions, it was obvious.
The exercise involves a series of statements that begin with acknowledging the unwanted emotion then moving through that into better feeling emotions. Statements made are declarative, succinct and include increasing levels of emotion as those emotions show up.
My client asked that I make a recording as an aid for her so she can use the recording to practice. Once I did it, I realized readers of this blog could benefit too. So, here it is free of charge. Simply click on this link. It will direct you to a google drive where you can download it to your computer or phone.
The first minute or so offers instructions, then the remaining eight minutes offer the exercise.
Don’t be fooled
As simple as this may sound recorded, the exercise contains great power. Used alone, anyone suffering from occasional or mild anxiety can eliminate such experiences from daily life. Used in conjunction with other practices I offer in my Positively Focused sessions, even those with chronic, medicated anxiety can find so much relief over time, they can eventually get off their medication.
It’s hard when so many people give so much advice about things while not really understanding the purpose and origins of such things. Emotions are one such thing. Without understanding them, doctors, psychologists and psychiatrists do people a disservice.
I realize they’re doing their best and many sincerely want to help.
Of course, there are severe conditions existing where putting people on medications provides needed relief. And from there, a person can eventually perhaps discover ways to better manage chronic anxiety and other unwanted emotions, such as depression.
But for the vast majority of anxiety and depression sufferers, there are very good reasons why such experiences happen. They don’t have to happen. But unless one understands why they happen, finding the way out remains elusive.
Don’t be fooled. Anxiety needn’t be a constant companion. Discover your own inherent, natural relief from anxiety. Then use it for its intended purpose.
Then you’ll find yourself appreciating anxiety for what it is: a blessing. Not a curse. Want to know more? I can help.
It’s so fun helping clients discover they create their reality. I love participating in that unfolding. When such people discover their manifestation power, they realize they can create what they thought was impossible. Then their lives get really fun.
Of course, everything is possible. The only things keeping some things impossible are beliefs we hold. “That’s impossible” is a self-fulfilling prophesy.
Things change though when someone discovers they stand at the center of the Universe. There they realize they create everything around them. Including all the lovers they want…or the lack thereof. 🤷🏽♂️
Stories are powerful
One client’s personal experience showed how powerful, or disempowering, beliefs can be. She started practicing with me 36 sessions ago. Last week, something happened that amazed her.
During those 36 weeks, Jennifer (not her real name) uncovered many disempowering beliefs. They included beliefs about dating, about men, about men’s intentions. But they also included beliefs about Jennifer herself. These included beliefs like the following:
I’m not good enough to get what I want
I’m too fat to get the guy I want
Men only want me for sex
I’m too old
Time’s running out for me to find a guy
I never can find the right guy I want
Taken together these beliefs created Jennifer’s reality. What did that reality look like? One where men she met wanted her for sex only. Several often called her, but only when drunk. They demanded sexually explicit texts, wouldn’t talk on the phone, and when Jennifer pushed the issue, they would ghost her. Others made promises to meet in person, only to disappear later.
No wonder Jennifer, who happens to be transgender, formed negative beliefs about dating, about men and about men’s intentions.
It’s not that her beliefs weren’t true. After all, she formed many of them from past experience. But if Jennifer wants what she wants, she can’t expect to get it while holding beliefs about what she doesn’t want, no matter how true they are.
Beliefs are powerful. They can create more of the same. Or they can create what you want.
Choose: get what you want or be right
Jennifer had a choice. She could talk about what’s true and be right. Or she could create beliefs and talk about what she wants and get that.
For example, one belief she had about men was “I’ll never meet a nice guy locally”. Every guy she had met, she met through OKCupid. Desperation had her using online dating. No matter how many times I told her online dating works terribly, she kept using it.
That’s because she also believed it was the only way she met men. See how beliefs create reality? Her’s about not meeting local guys had her believing she could only meet men online. So that’s how she met them. And, the men she met there showed up consistent with her other beliefs. Especially beliefs about herself as a transgender woman.
The online experience only amplified her frustration, which in turn reinforced her beliefs. Again, Jennifer can’t entertain beliefs about her past and get what she wants. Instead, she must focus on what she wants. That’s what we focused on in the ensuing 36 sessions.
Evidence starts proving it works
Over time, Jennifer’s new, empowering beliefs started creating realities consistent with themselves. It was rough going at first. Often Jennifer reinforced her old ones more than energizing new, more empowering ones.
However, there’s something cool about telling positive stories. Such stories enjoy enormous creative potential. You see, the Universe wants everyone to enjoy what they want, no exceptions. So when someone lines up with what they want by telling positive stories about it, they become a match to that. Then, that person gradually starts seeing evidence of what they want showing up everywhere.
That’s what happened with Jennifer. For example, men started waving at her as she walked down the street. Every time it happened, she said, she looked behind her to see if the guys were waving at someone else. Nope, they waved at her.
Or the male barista at the drive up kiosk would chat Jennifer up, where before he would ignore her. Another time a gas station attendant complimented her nails. And another time, a male restaurant sever paid particular attention to her as he attended the table she sat at with friends.
Ordinary people chalk these examples up to “coincidence” or some other logical explanation. But there’s no such thing as coincidence and logic has nothing to do with it! Everything happens on purpose. The purpose is reflecting back beliefs one tells about what’s happening.
The more Jennifer got this, the more such things happened.
Evidence grows more insistent
Until one day while walking her dog at the local dog park, a man who also had his dog approached her. He said hi and Jennifer returned the greeting. They enjoyed a nice conversation while their dogs played. Afterward, the guy said “Oh, dude, I gotta go. I’m late.”
Now Jennifer interpreted that as the guy misgendering her. We don’t know what his intentions really were, but I told her telling such a story was not in her best interest.
“It’s better to make up a story that you feel better about,” I said.
“Like what?” She asked.
“Like ‘the guy was using “dude” like some people do. It’s just a figure of speech, like an exclamation”,” I replied.
At first, Jennifer didn’t like that new story. But after some cajoling she admitted it felt better than the knee-jerk story she wanted to tell.
I told her telling such stories would create the next evidence that would knock Jennifer’s socks off.
And that’s exactly what happened next.
It bowls you over
Jennifer had other beliefs not related to men and dating. These needed attention too. The combination of beliefs, what I call a Belief Constellation, creates everyone’s reality. Jennifer’s constellation included many negative beliefs about her work and her manager. Those beliefs kept Jennifer on edge, defensive and feeling like a victim.
Feeling on edge, defensive and victimhood makes one a match to situations that exacerbate feeling those ways. And not just work situations, dating situations too. That’s why we needed to soothe Jennifer’s work beliefs too.
That took a while, but the better Jennifer felt, the more she wanted to do the practice. In time, evidence at work convinced her more and more her new beliefs were working.
Her boss complimented her more and more. She gave Jennifer more responsibilities. When Jennifer announced she was looking for openings in other departments, her manager offered to reclassify her job so she could get more pay. Finally, her manager came out and told Jennifer how much she valued her and how much she wanted Jennifer to stay.
Evidence at work was bowling Jennifer over. It amazed her that simply telling positive stories could literally change her relationship with her boss!
Then one day Jennifer texted me from work telling me how a process I taught her – called PRE-PAVING – helped change her work experience. In the text, she misspells it as “preparing”:
Then it happened
Riding on that positive momentum created what happened next. Jennifer felt good about changes happening at work. So much so, she softened on the idea that she couldn’t meet men in person. She started acknowledging evidence showing she was meeting men. It’s just that she hadn’t soothed negative beliefs enough to have such men approach her in person.
That all changed rather suddenly.
A few days after a remarkably powerful session, Jennifer sent me a text. It was awesome:
Many layers prove how powerful this experience was for Jennifer. For one, she didn’t have to do ANYTHING to meet this LOCAL, GORGEOUS guy other than follow her intuition to take Rocco out for walk. Second, there’s NO WAY ON EARTH she could have deliberately sought out this guy. It could only happen this way, a perfect orchestration of her unfolding reality.
Third, the guy did all the work. He approached her and initiated a conversation. But most of all, what’s super awesome about this rendezvous, is through it, Jennifer realized yet another belief she needs to clean up:
“He’s out of my league.”
However, even though that happened, she still had an experience totally contrary to EVERY experience she had in the past.
Every encounter a stepping stone
It’s really important at the point of receiving this experience that Jennifer enjoy the experience. Negatively judging herself does no good. Neither does harsh self-criticism about not doing something she thought she should have done. Everything worked perfectly here because this rendezvous wasn’t meant to be the perfect match or the perfect lover.
What it was, was an experience clarifying for Jennifer where she is on the path to becoming the perfect match to her perfect lover. How else will she know what disempowering beliefs remain in her constellation, if she doesn’t get to see her constellation in action? This experience worked perfectly.
It encouraged her. It created more desire in her. The fact that it happened gladdened her, inspiring her to the possibility that more such experiences can happen. It was a local connection! Something she thought impossible. And it showed that gorgeous men show interest in her.
So many disempowering beliefs got a dose of positivity just through this one experience. And so long as she remains in all these powerfully positive interpretations, Jennifer makes herself a match to more such experiences in the future.
Every client gets it
I love it when these kinds of things happen for my clients. Every client enjoys this kind of progression on their way to the love, the life, their greatest desires.
Everything is possible. Including having a relationship matching one’s wildest dreams. Nothing stands in the way of whatever anyone wants other than beliefs a person tells that are contrary to what’s wanted.
Clean those beliefs up though and watch how remarkable life gets.
Life is a wish-granting jewel. No matter what one wishes for, one can have it. One only need become a match to it, then draw that which is wished for to them as they hold themselves as a match to it.
I show clients how to do that. It’s easy, it’s fun and it works. Every time. You ready for your true love, your version of the Charmed Life Jennifer’s creating? I can help.
The best way to get everything one wants in life is to pursue what’s wanted because pursuing it is joyful. This is especially true when wanting something most people think is impossible. Such as “manifesting” more money, a relationship or a better job.
That’s because most people will tell you their opinion on how to get those things. And rarely will they offer the “manifesting” path. They’ll tell you “the odds” of you “manifesting” that thing. The’ll tell you getting something that way is “wishful thinking”.
They’ll tell you to be “realistic”. Being realistic means “trying hard”. It means doing what others do. It involves focusing with the end in mind and “faking it till you make it.”
All of those ways can work. But look around at people doing it that way. It’s hard work. People hate the process. And hardly anyone gets what they’re after, because the path is so filled with struggle many or most give up on what they want. Or worse, they compromise. They settle for something “ok” instead of holding out for their dream.
Compromising is what happens when someone goes after something thinking the result is what they’re after. If, however, a person goes after something, knowing the journey to that thing is what matters most, the entire process and experience of the process changes. It’s no longer a struggle, it’s a joy. The process of doing becomes the purpose of the doing, not the means to the ends. And in that mind space, what one wants happens fast.
Your action isn’t the main attraction
Why does this happen? Because when the mind isn’t focused on the end goal, the mind becomes open to millions of avenues leading to the goal instead of the one way one thinks it must happen.
Think about it. When focused on a particular goal, say, finding a lover, usually people think of one particular way to get that lover. The main way they think it must happen has to do mainly with their taking action to “make something happen”.
But the majority of people who get what they want, especially really big things they want, hardly ever get those things through their hard work. And usually, if they’re honest when asked, those people attribute “success” to “luck” or “god” or some other force greater than themselves that made it all possible. There’s truth to their attribution. Your action is not the main attraction.
Often, these people reach a point in their “doing” where they realize they’ve done all they can. With nothing more they can do, they give up. They surrender to “come what may”. Typically, once they give up, once they surrender, that thing they want shows up. It’s not the surrender that makes that happen. It’s what happens when they surrender.
Surrender to the journey
When one surrenders, they give up actions, but also thoughts standing between them and the easy flow of what is wanted. In other words, the person no longer stands in the way of what they want. Instead, in giving up, they become a cooperative element in the unfolding.
Another way of “surrendering” is giving up focusing on the end goal and instead enjoying the process, doing what one’s doing for no other reason than the joyful doing of the doing. A client and I talked about exactly this recently. Take a listen:
I have several really big things I’m “manifesting”. They include things 99 percent of humans will say can’t be done. But I know those things on my list are as easy for me as an eternal being, with the power of the Universe behind me, to accomplish as it is to walk from one room to another. However, I must relax into the process of their unfolding, because I too have residual belief in their impossibility.
It’s not the “impossibility” of the things I want keeping them from happening. It’s the belief in the impossibility slowing things down. So for someone like me, who wants really big things showing up, I must focus relentlessly on the journey as the goal rather than the goal itself. That’s why I see, nearly every day, evidence of their unfolding.
Everyone can enjoy fulfilled wishes
Compared to what’s on my list, finding a partner or a job or whatever is easy as pie. All that’s required is giving up thoughts contrary to what one wants. Thoughts contrary to what one wants aren’t the only ones that must go though. Thoughts seemingly having nothing to do with the goal also must go. This is why it seems to take forever for people to “manifest” something.
They aren’t willing to surrender. Meaning, they aren’t willing to give up what they must to have what they want.
Anyone can have what they want no matter what it is because the Universe is a wish-granting jewel ready to deliver ANYTHING someone can formulate desire for.
All that’s required is focusing on the reason why one wants what they want rather than focusing on the thing wanted. Doing that will naturally put one in alignment with the wanted thing, so long as the reasons feel good.
If a person can remain in those good feelings, instead of thinking about how lonely they are, or how impossible the goal seems, they’ll get what they want. It’s that easy.
Feeling good is like finding
It’s easy because when a person focuses on why they want and feel good in that, the desire itself becomes more important than the fulfillment. They don’t need the thing they want, because they already feel good without it. So the desire’s fulfillment becomes irrelevant. When a person gets there, then having what they want is icing on the cake because they already feel as they will feel when what they want comes. Feeling good about what you want is as good as having it. And when you’re there, what you want must show up.
It’s not hard shifting that focus. It can happen in as little as five minutes. You know you’ve done that when you feel good right now, even without having what you want. And again, when you feel good, you’re closer to having what you want than you think.
If you want to know more about how this all works, set up a free 1:1 and let’s talk. Let’s discover how easy it is to have anything you want. It’s not as impossible as you think. All you need is more happy. Then everything in life will come on its own accord.
Early in his sessions, a client from our sister organization, The Transamorous Network asked “Are you saying that if you tune your vibration, you can never have contact with negative people?”
“Yes,” I said.
It’s hard believing EVERYTHING is possible. Until some things a person thinks impossible start happening. Such is the case with this client. His life filled with all kinds of people connections. Some were positive, cordial, even friendly.
But others were downright hostile. Especially his encounters with people he knew well. This client attributed the latter encounters to the fact that “I basically have been a dick my entire life.”
“Being a dick” though is a story/belief. Everything in physical reality comes to us based on our emanating vibrations. Stories about life, thoughts and beliefs all carry vibrations. So how people react to us – and how we react to them – tells us a lot about what’s going on with our vibration.
Or rather it can, when one learns how they create their reality.
Evidence comes when invited
Which is what this client started learning. Early on he still kept experiencing less than happy encounters. All the while, I stood steadfast, knowing everyone creates their reality. “Reality” includes people we meet, date, marry. We even create our family members, including our parents and grandparents.
This client’s vibration still needs work. But he’s receiving early signs convincing him my assertion’s accuracy. It’s not actually my assertion though. It’s a universal law.
How do I know he’s receiving early signs? Because people around him are experiencing what he’s talking about. Including me. So do lives of my other clients.
For example, this week, while talking with a Positively Focused client on his 100th session, the client brought up something very interesting. Take a listen:
The moment he said this, I knew sharing this with my Transamorous Network client would be a great idea. I wanted this client’s permission first, so I sent the clip to him asking to share it.
That took a couple days. In those ensuing days, I had a remarkable, similar example. It was as though the Universe was driving the point home.
While walking through my neighborhood park, I passed two people, a man and woman. They walked hand-in-hand immersed in conversation. Even so, the guy looked at me. At that moment, I stood fully in my high vibration. I met his gaze with an ear-to-ear smile and a twinkle in my eye.
I made a lap around the park. Then, as I turned a corner, the same couple approached.
“Excuse me, excuse me,” the guy said.
“Yes?” I replied.
“You have the greatest smile,” He said.
What confirmation! But also, the moment that happened too, I knew sharing it with my Transamorous Network client would make his day.
He creates his own evidence
Sharing these experiences, I knew, would soothe the his resistance allowing his life to prove that he too, can create such a reality. One where he never meets negative people ever again.
Little did I know, he already was there. I shared what happened with him via text. What he wrote back didn’t surprise me at all:
This client is on his 35th session. He needed some prompting to realize he already is producing evidence he once thought impossible. How did he miss it before this? His negative focus. That’s all.
And that’s the thing. While people focus on all the negative things happening in the world, thinking focusing on the negative things is how negative things get solved, there’s a TON of positive things happening. Negative things resolve themselves when human consciousness focuses on the positive things. That’s because human consciousness is an amplifier.
Whatever it focuses on, gets bigger.
Everything is possible
Is it possible to never have negative encounters? Of course! Even better: it’s possible ONLY to have great encounters with people. When you’re a match to great encounters, that’s what you’re going to attract. Living as a match to great encounters means you, yourself live so high flying you only offer great encounters.
And when you live from there, the only people you’ll meet are those matching that way of being.
It’s lovely knowing this, but it’s even better experiencing it. For in the experiencing, one really gets that if this kind of thing is possible – if you can create other people as the versions of them you want to experience – then ANYTHING else is possible too.
I prefer saying EVERYTHING is possible. Because it is!
Some people think when practicing meditation or other manifestation process, that focusing on the big things – manifestations like jobs, money, and relationships – are the goal.
But it’s really the tiny things, those little, moment-by-moment realizations, that make the big things reveal themselves. And without those little things, the big things don’t happen. That’s because the prime objective of such a practice is joy, not manifestations.
For example, a client realized this recently as he advanced in his Positively Focused practice. He’s a musician, and as he thought about his upcoming practice one day, he made a remarkable discovery.
“Before my practice session,” he began. “I had the thought ‘well, what am I going to work on today?’ Then I thought ‘oh that sounds so depressing.'”
“So I said to myself ‘I’m just going to enjoy what happens.’ So I just started improvising and really got interested in this one particular thing and off I went.”
He continued. “What happened was I put the emphasis on enjoyment, and ended up enjoying working on something that needed working on, because of the enjoyment, rather than working on something I needed to work on, which would have been boring and unenjoyable.”
It seems this little realization isn’t much. But don’t be fooled. Such little things are precursors or harbingers of big things. And the more someone focuses on these little things, especially one’s feelings, the sooner bigger things happen.
In this client’s experience he learned that a joy-orientation instead of task-orientation creates outcomes just as powerful, but much more enjoyable, than task-orientation. It’s way more fun too!
The pay-offs are infinite
This kind of awareness, putting joy first, pays huge dividends. The greater one cultivates such an awareness, the more they realize we all live submerged in a sea of blessings, all happening specifically for our enjoyment.
This is the Charmed Life I write about. The experience of life as a moment-by-moment joyful experience. Were eveything one wants happens…effortlessly.
The Universe wants us all living in joy. That’s why discovering it feels so good. This client shared more of his unfolding experience later in the same session:
“There’s been a lot of moments,” he added. “Just in the last couple of weeks, where I’ve deliberately put my attention on the fact that me and society in general are all being pretty much taken care of all the time,”
“Aside from the amazing cosmic set-up allowing all this to happen,” He explained. “Even at the societal level [we’re taken care of].”
He went on describing things he realized indicate this. For example, even simple things, inventions like the rear view mirror, he said, make life so easy for everyone.
“All the things we take for granted, yet they’re made out of compassion the benefit of others…everything, everything is geared up to help each other. It’s amazing!!!”
We live among treasure troves
Indeed, these little things, like roads, traffic signals, standards and conventions, and inventions like rear-view mirrors, reveal how good life is. But only to those willing to take time to appreciate what’s really happening.
With these inventions, every one of us may move through life in relative comfort, ease and joy. We can pursue all kinds of activities. Activities bringing us satisfaction, pleasure and fulfillment.
Afterwards, my client and I marveled in his realizations. And we marveled for a purpose. Because by focusing on these little things, focusing on them and appreciating them for the blessings they are, our perception broadens until life reveals its secrets.
In every life instance, every waking moment, we stand among treasure troves. Troves everyone enjoys, or takes for granted.
But when one focuses on these little things, recognizing and appreciating them, they soothe resistance born of bogus beliefs about life. Those bogus beliefs make the troves invisible. Meanwhile, these little things, things bogus beliefs make impossible to see, add up to larger blessings. They add up to things we desire, like more money, better work, peace and happiness and, yes, even love.
Castles and buttons both seen easy
Over time though, as resistance gives way to a positive focus, one discovers their place at the center of the Universe. There the Universe reveals its conspiracies. There are co-created processes happening all the time that deliver to everyone everything they want.
The revelation transforms human consciousness. It creates in the individual an unshakeable certainty of one’s eternal, invincible and blessed nature.
Only those who line up with what they want get this gift. The giving of which comes through becoming Positively Focused.
Focusing on the little things is the first step. These little things Abraham calls “buttons”. Once they become visible, seeing those things we really care about, the greater manifestations, gets easier. Abraham calls those greater manifestations, “castles“.
But again, perceiving accurately the buttons unfolding in order to see castles unfolding one must cultivate that chronic positive focus. When cultivated, nurtured and maintained, resistance born of negative beliefs fades. Then, like my client, the Positively Focused person sees the bewildering reality of physical reality: the Charmed Life.
From there, buttons cause a giddy delight. Your gaze fills with them. Then and only then, riding on the momentum of evidence your Charmed Life exists, your castles start showing you steps leading to their unfolding. Like this other client expressing his wonder at how well the practice works:
Are you ready?
So by deliberately focusing on life’s positive aspects, one gradually lives a chronic state of experiencing buttons lining a path leading to castles. The bigger, full-blown manifestations waiting for everyone in their version of the Charmed Life exist. The question is, are people ready to experience them?
Whether you are or not, I love being chronically Positively Focused. Like my clients, I see more and more evidence of unfoldings consistent with what I want. Nothing is off limits. Everything is possible. I create a life rich in abundance of all kinds.
It’s gratifying seeing my clients get there too. And when they appreciate getting there, I revel in their appreciation.
For as they do that, it confirms my own process, my own practice, my own expansion. Then our sessions become what they ultimately are: opportunities to revel together in the unfolding or our creation-rich Charmed Lives.
Everyone lives in the past. That seems like nonsense, but bear with me as I describe why that is. With just a little Positively Focused practice under your belt, clients realize how accurate that statement is. But if you don’t see life through Positively Focused eyes, “everyone lives in the past” sounds like nonsense.
But it’s not.
The reason everyone lives in the past is because they, through science and traditional education, learn a screwy perspective. We’re all taught “the present” is where we live. Things that happened “before” – that’s they past, we’re told. Things that haven’t happened – that’s the future. So people strive to live in the “present”, while sometimes referring to this commonly accepted past and future.
The best, and most satisfying way to live lines up with breaking free of traditional, common knowledge. Stepping out of traditional, commonly accepted knowledge, turns hum-drum, ordinary, uninspiring lives into the Charmed Life I write about.
Why change perspectives?
It seems we live in the “present”, in the “now”, our current experience. Birds fly about. Dogs bark. Cars whoosh by. Winds blow through trees. Yep, that looks like the present.
From a universal perspective though, this is not the present. This is the past. It represents ideas – thoughts and beliefs – that have manifestED. From a universal perspective, which is the same perspective your Broader Perspective has, humanity’s commonly believed “present” is not the present or the now. It is the past. It’s manifested.
Why is this so important? How does one benefit by changing perspective?
It’s important because every human is a creator. They create by observing, then drawing conclusions about what they observe. Conclusions, thoughts, desires, preferences…they all represent the same thing. That same thing represents cosmic focus, which channeled, moves all of creation toward fulfillment of that conclusion, thought, desire or preference.
That means, when a person looks at what people commonly agree is the present, which is past manifestation, and they conclude randomly about that, they create more of what’s manifested.
“No” means “yes”
So if a person or a group doesn’t like what they see, and they rail against that, they create more of that. Pushing against anything in the manifestED means giving attention to and focus on that. Again, attention begins the process of creation. It doesn’t matter if “attention” one gives sounds like “I don’t like this”. The person giving attention will get what they don’t like.
The Universe doesn’t understand English (or any other language). It only understands vibration. Attention is vibration. It doesn’t matter if you look at something and say “I don’t want this”. Your vibration of attention, whether you like what you attend to or not, tells the Universe “give me more of this”.
This is why things like racism, wars, political division and such continue long after people want something better or different. Everyone’s looking at what’s happening, then concluding in ways that create more of what they’re looking at.
In other words, they live in the manifested past.
Such things take so long to change because humans also stand opposed to what they want, even when they think they are standing in alignment with what they want. Those wanted things are coming and will manifest, which is why, often, future generations benefit from what previous generations wanted. While those previous generations die off in a state of not getting what they want.
Then what’s a better way?
People creating their lives consciously know the commonly known present moment is actually the past. They spend little to no attention there. Instead, they stand in the Unfolding Present, the Moment of Becoming, as Seth calls it.
What is the Unfolding Present?
The Unfolding Present is the no-space space from where the new, the manifestING emerges. It is the instantaneous now, each now moment, fresh and full of creative vitality. And it’s a place one can experience with practice, just like they now experience the commonly-believed present moment, which is the past.
Now all moments contain creative vitality. But the Unfolding Present holds incipient creative vitality. It is the fountain from which creation springs. The Unfoldling Present exists someplace other than physical reality. Which is why a Positively Focused practice is necessary. Ordinary people cannot perceive this “now.”
Figuring it out
This “space” that is the Unfolding Present is a state of being. It’s the state in which children dwell before they’re indoctrinated into “growing up”. Some call it the “flow state”, others call it imagination.
How I prefer describing it is that place in which one knows one’s desires are done, and from that knowing, one relaxes into the IS-ness of being. That being-state feels WONDERFUL.
Figuring out how to be in that state is hard to grasp, I know. Now you can see why a Positively Focused is required. A person must figure out how to get there. It isn’t easy.
But getting there is inevitable, because that’s the basis of everyone’s Broader Perspective state. And everyone’s Broader Perspective wants them experiencing the real present moment, the Unfolding Present or the Moment of Becoming. Most don’t get there until they make their after-death transition. That needn’t be your fate though.
The Charmed Life
The reason your Broader Perspective wants you there is because it is from there that all you want unfolds. Whether conscious of it or not, the Moment of Becoming or the Unfolding Present shoots out of you, turning the ManifestED into something else.
For most people “something else” looks like exactly what they’re looking at or focused on. Which is why the commonly accepted “present” looks stable. It’s also, as I wrote above, why social change happens slowly.
If one remains unconscious of this state, the Charmed Life remains concealed behind random creations, those manifestations springing from the Moment of Becoming that look a lot like everyone’s commonly accepted present or even the commonly accepted past. That’s why car makers, for example, often “renew” models they created for the first time decades ago.
Become conscious of this state though, and your foot comes off the brakes. A new momentum reveals itself, as well as a new way of perceiving. Then your Charmed Life reveals itself to you. From there, you discover, or rather rediscover, childhood wonder.
The world looks fresh, new, constantly. And, you also perceive your desires unfolding. As you focus more there, you give attention to that. As I wrote above, attention begins the creation process. So attention on what you want, instead of what you don’t, creates what you want, instead of more of what you have.
When you perceive that always happening, you live the Charmed Life while standing in its Unfolding. Nothing beats that.
A personal advanced example
This morning as I’m writing this, I’m thrilled with an experience I enjoyed coming from nonphysical. I came to at about 4 a.m.
Laying in bed, I perceived dreams wherein I taught myself an advanced version of what you’re reading about. In the dream, I felt deep satisfaction while standing in the “now” that contains all my current desires. Some of my desires are extraordinary. Some others represent experiences I know will thrill me as they manifest more.
But what I got in the dream state, then amplified while awake in bed, was standing in the fulfillment of those desires is the Moment of Becoming. And when I “stand” there, I don’t feel excitement, or thrill. Instead, I feel a calm, stable knowing. A knowing born from seeing my desires surrounding me, fully manifested.
This state of awareness makes me a match to my FULFILLED desires. Thinking about them as though I want them, as though I don’t have them, has me standing in the manifestED space. There, I can’t have fulfilled desire because if I still want them, I’m focused on the fact that they aren’t there/here.
As mentioned, it takes practice being in a body while focused on and living in the Unfolding. But I assure you, the feeling that comes with being there, fully-tuned to one’s Broader Perspective and living witness to one’s Charmed Life is, unmatched.
My experience with it lead me to offer what I’ve experienced to others. Now that a stable of clients produce their version of my results, their results confirm and amplify my own. Nothing matches this life, where my spirituality not only is my income, it also generates profound wonder of All That Is.
You can have this too
Two of my clients have begun the intermediate practice. They are blown away by experiences they had with earlier stages. Those stages and results they produced acted like positive feedback loops. I wrote about this upward spiral before.
When a person discovers this practice, then practices it, early results are instant. But they’re not so convincing because humans get trained out of understanding what’s introduced. Nevertheless everyone gets them, which is why I offer my money-back guarantee.
But those results kick off a process that’s one-way and inevitable. In a short while for some, a while longer for others, those initial results turn into more obvious results.
Taught how to see these, the client gets excited. Then they want more results, so they do the practice more. More practice amplifies their results, which means more and more convincing results happen.
Before long, clients stand convinced the Charmed Life is real. And the more they reach for it, the more it reveals itself. In time, the client is ready for more advanced practice.
Everyone comes into the world knowing the Charmed Life awaits them. But few get there because they accept indoctrination from others who are oblivious to what’s going on.
That’s ok. It’s usually not fatal. But that does lead to mediocre lives.
PS – this post flew from my fingers after using the bathroom. I had felt the impulse come while in the bathroom and, because I practice following such impulses, I experienced delight watching this post flow. Thanks for reading it. I know you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed is manifested unfolding.
Every Positively Focused client gets the clarity and power and joy promised through the Positively Focused practice. It’s guaranteed or they get their money back. No one asks for their money back though because everyone gets great results.
I love it when clients rave about their results. Their experiences amplify and confirm my own, which is a great fringe benefit supporting my own Positively Focused practice.
Case in point: recently a band-new client expressed pleasure with results he received from a process I offer in client sessions. What’s really cool about his experience is, this happened after only one session.
This is why I guarantee the practice works. It’s also why clients tend to stick with me once they start. The practice works. It delivers exactly what I say it does. And so, it’s no surprise clients send texts like the one above.
Gradually they discover life on their side. They also discover they stand at the center of the Universe. Then their life improves. It becomes the Charmed Life they knew it would be when they decided to come into a body.
From that point forward, their life fills with self-fulfilling desires. The more that happens, the more fun the person experiences. Then something really cool happens.
They stop being human and become the super human they were before they forgot who and what they are.
I love helping people rediscover their creative power and joy. It brings me joy. And it amplifies what I know about myself.